Tag:

brave

I’m Angry

by Ylem 4/24/2016

written by Ylem

Angry at a certain someone, but still feel okay.
Here’s what a supposed friend of mine said to me a few days ago. Since I’m an internalizer as my therapist calls it, it keeps playing over and over in my head and pissing me off all over again.

I used to feel so sad for you and your family. I’d pray for you guys, for God to comfort you and give you strength. Until I realized you don’t want to get better. Now I feel so sad for your mother, for all she is going through because of your “illness”.
You strike me as one person […]

4/24/2016 12 comments

Trying to be brave

by chelle428 4/12/2016

written by chelle428

So if you follow my posts then you know that I have very severe self harm scars on my arm and that they are a great source of stress in my life. I’ve been working on covering them with makeup and even though they are still visible they don’t look quite so bad. I’ve been doing my best to heal them and help their appearance. It’s been almost a year since I last cut.

I’ve always been terrified of friends or boys I like seeing them. I decided tomorrow I’m going to go out without covered for the first time in a year.I will probably wear […]

4/12/2016 5 comments

To Blue Tinker Bell…

by HERE4UOK 3/30/2016

written by HERE4UOK

Hello All –

Sorry I’ve been away for a while.

I just have been dealing with the recent loss of a truly dear friend and member of one of the groups I volunteer at.

She is deeply and terribly missed by all of us left behind and not a day has gone by when I haven’t thought about her. “If only…” thoughts plague my mind and tug down my heart, and as much as I understand that she is now free, that she’s now relieved of all her problems, DAMN IT THIS HURTS SO MUCH..!!!

14.

Too young.

I don’t know if to think she was too young to give up, […]

3/30/2016 2 comments

by LetItGo 3/6/2016

written by LetItGo

when it happened i was yielding
waiting waiting waiting
for someone to come i didnt know it yet
i didnt realize i was waiting grasping on to each breath like it was going to be my last
it happened so gradually i never once closed my eyes and shouted the word no
people take that as acceptance as if its such a black and white matter it is gray space and static it is no opposite there is no box holding me in or leaving me out
my hurt is not romantic nor is it happy hurt it is not hurt that i cry […]

3/6/2016 1 comment

Why?

by okatonshadow 9/29/2015

written by okatonshadow

The questions everyone has been asking for a while now is “why?”. So, I’m now going to tell you why.

Humans are idiots. I’m not saying we should all die, but humans are idiots. If you have something big to live for, goals, dreams, whatever, go for it. But I don’t. The only thing keeping me up right now is my family, and that doesn’t feel like enough anymore. I move all over the place, so I don’t have any concrete friends. My favorite thing to do is read, because I can be taken into another world, and because books have a definite ending. It’s the […]

9/29/2015 7 comments

the time is now

by anu 8/26/2015

written by anu

hi….I just wanna tell u some thing
is there any one understand the meaning of life in this world….but still I am not……I think it’s meaning less……
my family, my friend… hates me a lot….
before some days I tryed many times to kill my self b/c am not brave to do this
but Now the time is coming………

8/26/2015 2 comments

I hate it

by Chelseamx 8/20/2015

written by Chelseamx

I hate my life. I hate being alone. I hate people. I hate my face and my body. I hate that I’m not brave enough to kill myself.

8/20/2015 3 comments

Unsure

by Enough2015 8/12/2015

written by Enough2015

I found myself here while googling suicide by carbon monoxide poisoning.

I’m almost 40 years old. I have always thought of suicide but never brave enough to do it. Some people really don’t belong here on earth and I know I am one of them. As I get older I realise it will happen, just don’t know when. I don’t want to die, I just don’t want to live anymore.

It is winter here and I’m hearing on the news about accidental carbon monoxide deaths, like bringing in a charcoal bbq to keep warm.

I thinkk this is my preferred method. Has anyone had a failed attempt?

Ah crap. […]

8/12/2015 17 comments

–

by One Million Masks 6/18/2015

written by One Million Masks

You know, I’ve always been quiet; I don’t get heard because I’ve never said a word that I thought people might actually listen to.
You know, I’ve always been forgettable; I blend into walls and make myself small, and people don’t often even see me– they believe what they want to believe and I get lost in the mystery of who are we talking about?
You know, I’ve always been gentle; no one gets hurt because the only pain that lurks around me gets buried in laughs and pulled-down shirts, because no one besides me deserves to gain new scars.
You know, I’ve always been […]

6/18/2015 6 comments

Naivety is a disease.

by AarinaDaae 1/27/2015

written by AarinaDaae

I should have known. I was stoic before I, really, met you. I was made of stone…granite! Nothing could break down these walls…then you came along. You changed me, somehow. You did everything right. You were nearly perfect! You were formal and appropriate. I convinced myself that I was being ridiculous. Why was I keeping you at a distance? I gave myself permission to let you into my heart and to see my soul…

HOW COULD YOU? I LOVED YOU! YOU MADE ME LOVE YOU!

Now where am I? I can’t eat without feeling sick. I go to bed with my last thoughts on you….and I wake […]

1/27/2015 1 comment

why continue?

by itdoesntgetbetter 1/19/2015

written by itdoesntgetbetter

I am in the process of planning a way out of my miserable existence. I am not some teenager suffering angst or going to kill myself over a boyfriend or failed relationship.

Life continues to shit on me and recent events have just proven it yet again. It does not matter what I do or learn, how I try to improve myself, who I know or meet, I am just fated to lose in every way imaginable. I’m almost 50 and have finally accepted it’s never going to be any different. There is no hope.
I’m giving myself a certain number of months to get everything […]

1/19/2015 3 comments

………………………….

by lostandconfused17 11/20/2014

written by lostandconfused17

I sit here on my own. Just waiting for someone to realize that I am an island. I wish someone would be brave enough to row out to sea, just to stumble upon me. But instead I sit here, alone and deserted. Minutes, days, months pass without human contact. Just me and my thoughts, swirling around like a hurricane. They batter my mind like wind against a wall, they tear me up by the roots and toss me around like I’m nothing. I guess I am nothing. If an island is never discovered, did it ever exist? I kind of doubt it.

But I will sit […]

11/20/2014 2 comments

My Invisible Family.

by Good Adjective 8/24/2014

written by Good Adjective

My Invisible Family. My Fallen Foes

Crammed into a room with no corners, no ceiling, no floor.

There was nothing but us, scared, blind and ready for war.

It was the last time I saw Shannon, my long lost twin sister.

She was sexy and sensitive and smart,

but I was swifter.

The last time I saw Josh, my long lost twin brother.

He was brave and bright and brought joy to all,

but I was tougher.

I am the hero knight sperm who rescued my imprisoned princess egg but I am also said damsel in distress who waited […]

8/24/2014 4 comments

Woke Up Screaming

by FearOfLosing 6/28/2014

written by FearOfLosing

I woke up screaming early this morning from a bad dream. In the dream, I was traveling down a road with my dog when a large black bear appeared at the end of the street. My dog, being the brave little idiot that he is, charged the bear. In the dream, I was screaming at him to come to me so that I could protect him from the bear. Of course, he wouldn’t listen and the bear was snarling and swiping at him with his huge paws. I was terrified that the bear was going to kill my dog.

I finally got my dog away from […]

6/28/2014 22 comments

by LetItGo 5/19/2014

written by LetItGo

Would you go?
To my funeral I mean
If I got the courage
To kill myself

If I knew you in person
You would meet my parents
And my sister
Though she’s a bit mean

When I die
And they put me 6 feet under
And a grave on top
Of the earth for me

If you visit my grave
Not saying you have to
But if you do
Please don’t bring flowers

Unless they’re fake
I like carnations then
They remind me
Of Valentine’s day

I never got a carnation
But I always gave them
To my friends
Because they never got them either

I also like roses
Red to […]

5/19/2014 3 comments

Just, tired.

by stranger_to_the_unknown 5/6/2014

written by stranger_to_the_unknown

I’m just tired.
I’m just sad.
I’m just angry.
Today at school, some Christian told me i wasn’t going to heaven. Just because i don’t believe in Jesus. I do believe in God, though. But she doesn’t seem to understand that. Then after that, a friend of mine told me she had gone to the guidance office with one of my other friends. Extremely concerned on what happened, i asked why. They told me, it was for me. Some “preps” were talking about me behind my back, during gym today. They were saying that me and my girlfriend weren’t really in love, that we were […]

5/6/2014 4 comments

WHERE DO I FIT IN?

by Hospital For Souls 4/20/2014

written by Hospital For Souls

I’m tired.

Life’s for those who can handle it.

Not me.

Suicide is for those who are brave enough to bid farewell.

Not me again.

So where do I fit in?

I’m closer to suicide. The pills, fast trains, slim blades, deep oceans – I don’t want to be here anymore.

I can’t endure anymore pain.

4/20/2014 14 comments

by wishthingsweredifferent 4/10/2014

written by wishthingsweredifferent

I want it. I want it so bad today. More than I’ve ever wanted it. To take the pills. I want them all. A sweet, beautiful mixture. The one that can end it all. No more pain, no more stress, no more hurt. I want it. I want it all to be over. Do I reach for them? There they are so close at hand. I have the solution to all my problems yet I am afraid to solve them. Always wary of the end results. One day I won’t be. One day I’ll be brave and end it all. One day I’ll […]

4/10/2014 1 comment

Suicide…

by CrimsonDream 3/16/2014

written by CrimsonDream

I think about it all the fucking time. It would be easy to end the pain, suffering, and self hate that I feel daily. No more depression. No more cutting. Just ignorant bliss. I don’t know what will happen but I do know it would be better than the misery I live now. I can’t live with myself. I am “living” in a constant hell and it’s killing me; it’s actually slowly driving me insane. So the question is how will I do it? There are so many different options; hanging, suffocation, drowning, slitting my wrists, overdose, jumping, electrocution and so much more. I’ve written […]

3/16/2014 4 comments

I gave up…

by Engeltje 3/11/2014

written by Engeltje

So I haven’t been here on SP for 1,5 month I guess. It’s because I’m doing really bad. In that time I quitted school, had an intake with 2 mental health institutions, going to start therapy next week, got a cat (it’s really a sweetheart and I’m so glad my parents agreed with a pet), and yeah, the only thing I do is sleeping and sitting. Not going outside anymore, see nobody. Actually I have no life anymore. And the thing is: I don’t give a f*cking shit, I don’t care.

Last week, I grabbed my knife and started to cut, made a cut on […]

3/11/2014 2 comments

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