I framed this at work yesterday and just love it. Cant give artist credit cos unknown to me. Once again pictures have to speak for me. (Was going to post this morning but ran outta time).
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cant
I’m not even sure if I can tell what is real anymore. The last year is a blur. I lost my wife. I quit my job. I lost my drivers licence. And now I cant even walk.
Recently I picked a fight with the wrong guy who broke my nose and then my leg when i was on the ground. As I am getting the shit kicked out of me I yell “KILL ME” at my attacker who immediately stops. Him and his friends back away as I black out.
I wake up in extreme pain. My foot is pointing the wrong way and I call an […]
Its been a while since ive been on here. I was feeling more positive for a while then it all went to shit. There is something really wrong with me. I subatage my life on purpose. Maybe im looking for rock bottom. Since the last time i posted i took a little trip back to jail. My dad likes to call it summer camp in polite conversation. Lol. I was fighting a serious charge for class x home invasion in illinois which gives you 6-30 years in jail. Last time i couldn’t tell the truth. Not when what i wanted to say could have been […]
Fuck this world ! Fuck its creator! Fuck this reality !! None of us asked to be here !! We only die when we have something to live for but you can go all ur life jus wanting the peace of death nd will never get it !!! So fuck this world cant wait for it to blow up!!! #wherethefuckisarmageden
I’ve been battling depression since the age of 13. In my community depression is seen as a sin. So I developed an outer shell that showed the world all was well. At 33 almost 34 married to a loving wife and 2 beautiful daughters, how is it that I can be so blessed yet so empty? Why do I consider death as a reprieve?
People, when I have broached the subject tell me it’s all in my mind, I opened up to my wife and she says she’ll help but is indifferent towards me now. I’m not even hanging on by a thread and up […]
Had to ditch visiting my mum today cos I cant leave the house. Shes going thru a rough time but I still cant help her. Now im sitting hear hating myself, racked with guilt. The spiral begins. Been repeating this pattern for sooo long!!
Why can’t I be left alone why I cant be just left alone . I am once again being tortured by every one my mother my father my in laws im tired… Im telling my self not to cry … Every wants to control my life …..my husband dosent want to go home because of my parents …I just cant be left alone cant tell them I wanna go to utah becuse there gonna flip why why why . cant cry stop it . I dont know what to doo so lost ….cant even get a chance to fix my life …..Im not a big […]
First off Im not saying that people here should be out there enjoying life, if they can great.
What I am saying is that in my mind, I have come to realize more and more that there isnt much wrong with the world, I just cant enjoy it.
There are people out there with good friends that they can connect with, or even the strangers that they meet. They can be creative and set goals, be satisfied with what they accomplish and fine with what they dont.
I dont think I can.
I am a mess of emotions and wrong thoughts. A sadist that sucks at life. If I […]
Can i stop talking. My words are useless. I am numb and cant love even if i wanted to or when i done before
They say it gets better and I want to believe that. I have fought with depression for so many years I hardly remember before I had it anymore. Yes there are times when I dont feel like blowing my head off. But time after time the feeling comes back. It seems to be my brains “go to” thought whenever Im even the slightest bit upset. I have tried depression medication…. Many kinds…. But they dont seem to do anything for me but make me a tired zombie. I stopped trying to find one that works about 8 years ago.
My husband cant grasp why I feel […]
NO home
family out of sight
tears shed
on this cold, dark night.
A razor
a deadly kiss
who wouldve known
it would end up like this.
A new year
the same shit
always sad
feeling worthless.
Had it up to here
cant go on
have no where to go
I dont belong.
and then she agreed to talk to me, like she did yesterday…..
and same as yesterday…..Nothing….
cant win for losing…..
and I was doing so much better…..
there are times when i feel completely numb and there are times when i feel as if nothing can bring me down. i am caught in a place where i cannot figure out how i truly feel. i am so sick of feeling like i have to block out my emotions because others around me cant understand it. i constantly feel alone, lost and out of control. i just need to know the reasons why i feel the way i do…
Just came from work, and im wondering how funny things are you know.
How pointless can we get, how hard it gets when one way that you can get conforted to live is that you know that you can die tomorrow somehow, this is sad, and deep, and it hurts.
How hard is to keep going when you got no proof of nothing , when you know that you can be great or nothing, but the only thing that u are sure is: u failed hard and you lost the light, is not only a loss, is even worst, is part of you, the living part?
And to help […]
I haven’t been here in almost a year. I had lost my family and just could not cope. I got lucky and saved my marriage, kept my family together. I was instantly ok again. Well, it didnt last. I guess I have issues. I fucked it up again. This time there’s no fixing it. Now I see why suicides peak around the holidays. The thought of missing my family at all, let alone for Xmas, is terrible. Ive pretty much made up my mind. I dont even care about the method anymore. Im just worried about what happens to the dog, who gets what stuff, […]
My life is more or less over. I don’t want to write my story, my brain just stopped working altogether.
From what I tried to discover, there is life after death, we just cant know what it is. So the only thing is belief that the next life will be better, nothing else. Dont panic.
It’s 4 AM and I havent slept a wink. I’ve been having trouble falling asleep lately.
I just passed the time cutting and burning myself. I still cant fall asleep.
Fuuuck! I hate this!
I have Aspergers syndrome.
I am a girl. Its not that visible. I am supposed to be very high functioning. The more I realize my struggles and my differences in contrast to other people.
I am pretty much down.
I just cant navigate through relationships. I cant let go of people. I still love somebody whom I loved five years ago, who moved, who I dont see anymore…etc. I make people mad. I make fuss of things that arent important. For normal people. I have just ruined another relationship of mine, because I was too pushy, too needy. I just dont seem to do anything right. Even weird […]
I. Am 22year old lady.i am so depressed that I dont want to live anymore.before I wanted to die soon but by natural death and was a no to suicide always but now I have no choice left.i am 5 6 tall 38kg..u can guess how thin I must be..and its irritating when always people tell how thin u are
ver and over again..and they keep on telling you will never get a guy if u don get healthy..and whatever I do I don’t put on weight.next thing is I am very silent I have seen many other silent people but I am tooooo silent than […]
this song …..
this is about suicide, this is about me, trying to take that step…
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