I have found this site helpful mainly because I now know I’m not alone.
I’ve always been depressed, since my parents split when I was 4 but I’m now 23 and I dont have anything to show. I had dreams to ve a musician and let them die.I came up with this idea to kill myself (the word suicide disgusts me) about two years ago but my future roommate convinced me better. I convinced myself that it was because she had feelings for me and I could find meaning in life by taking care of her and her child. our relationship got more intense, but […]
I got kidnapped by a friend yesterday, and somehow ended up in Wal-Mart (of all places) watching in horror as my sister Toni tore into some poor kid for asking if she was my mom. She’s only five years older than me, but…yeah. “Awkward” does not begin to describe that mess yesterday.
So, anyway, she storms out, leaving me and Dee to apologize and pick up the pieces and try to make a graceful exit. Then we come back here, and I start getting phone calls from my husband’s family. Apparently, to “punish” me for having the gall to look too young, my sister had called […]
lets start here u see i lived in texas till a year ago im 19 now so i just graduated highschool when that happened. so we moved to arizona and my mom picked up drinkink now she has fallen more and more into alcoholism to the point where just this night she hit me in my messed up back with a pipe and then proceeded to call the cops now shes gonna wake up tomorrow im gonna show her the video i took and shes gonna do what she always does shes gonna deny it and walk out the door then she will come home […]
My big brother is one of my “newest friends” we never really got along but last fall it all changed. My mom knew i would always cut, then one day she told my brother about the marks on my arms(there pretty big, i like to burn the skin and cut it out) when my mom told me i didnt know what to think, i wrote a long note of how i would stay up at night to see him and make sure he got home safely, he always got in trouble with the […]
I was always in the dark, but continuely fighting
Always afraid to fall asleep, and to let my head rest on the pillow
Living was and is hard, all the pushing, punching and biting
And still I sat there watching her beaten, he laughed like it was a joke
I held her, she held me
We were a very disfunctional family
When he took me from bed at night, he kept me in his room
Crying from hurt and fright
A young girl, from age three to age five
Abused and knew he was sick […]
Before you decide to take your life, imagine who will find you. Imagine them walking into a room, and seeing you just hanging there. Whether it be your little sister, little brother, mother father, grandparents, a friend. Imagine what will happen when they find you. No, they will not say “Finally, they’re gone.†No, they will not say “I’m happy they did that.†No, they will not say “I never loved them anyways.†They will die. Their hearts will break. They will hurt, more than you […]
Bieng Bi-Polar is hard for my young friend Gwen not many people understand her like I do.Its hard to have your over at my house and currently were dating which is also complicated. One day in the morning she said that she was going to die today being bi-polar I thought it would blow over but I never thought I would be in for such a big treat Room 224 2nd hour Mrs.**** she hated us that teacher did she would pick on me cause I was the jokester and Gwen hated it she stood up for me and got in trouble I always thanked […]
DON’T END YOUR LIFE , DON’T GIVE UP , REACH OUT TO ME.
Before you decide to take your life, imagine who will find you. Imagine them walking into a room, and seeing you just hanging there. Whether it be your little sister, little brother, mother father, grandparents, a friend. Imagine what will happen when they find you. No, they will not say “Finally, they’re gone.†No, they will not say “I’m happy they did that.†No, they will not say “I never loved them […]
Latest news from me.Â
Sumer the Moron
Sumer is back and I wish I could visit him and rip his arms and tongue out. Posting nudes on a site to help alleviate peoples problems caused by rape, abuse, and many other mishaps of life. That’s messed up. I just wonder, is it true that he’s insane? He’s smart, but also stupid. He’s a troll and an idiot. Even I’m not that far gone. I understand his mistrust of America, but attacking the weak? That’s just shitty man. We go here to cope, not to learn about washing machines and nudist colonies. (sad to say, I had “researched” […]
I come from a decent family and did not suffer a tramatic childhood. However it was not perfect. There was poverty. There was social services and cops. There was divorce and suicidal thoughts. What are we here for? To keep working, smile at eachother. If you don’t desire possessions then you don’t desire money. If you don’t care about money then you don’t care about a house,car,family ect. So why try? 40,60,80,100 years on this earth to make and work for what you leave behind? Why wait? I care too much about my family to make them look for my body. I care to much […]
I fuked up. About a year and a half ago I became addicted to painkillers I’ve been on suboxone for the past 6 month’s my wife found the suboxone pills about 4 months ago so I came clean and she left me and took my 1yr old daughter with her and is using my past drug problem against me to get custody and prevent me from regularly seeing my daughter I also got caught shoplifting about a month ago and during my addiction I used my corporate credit card for work to take cash advances to pay for my pills work found out fired me […]
“Step one you say we need to talk,
he walks, you say sit down it’s just a talk,
He smiles politely back at you,
You stare politely right on through”
If only they would listen…
If only I could go back in time, to that night. Cherry. She jumped off the roof of a hospital. She drank until she found courage to swallow those pills. Called the cops on herself. That is what amazes me the most. Why had she called the cops? Why? If she was just going to go and jump off that building? I just want to go back in time, know […]
hi all.
someone (me) took my username, so I used my username as my password. anywho.
some idiot told me to call the suicide hotline about a month ago, and I’ve called it before, and from many different states in the USA. this was about a month or year ago. I really do forget.
I tried to kill myself for about 5 years maybe ten. I stopped trying to kill myself about 4 years or maybe 3 years ago now. Now I bounce in between states, jail and doctors offices. it’s great don’t get me wrong, if I had a gun I would shoot hella stuff, but I […]
iv been unemployed for 4years plus and my gcse are rubbish and there no chanc of my life improveing iv applyed to go back to collage iam hopeing they take me back. i do jui jitsu to help me stay up but my coach is hardly there and the students are rubbish there no other gyms in my area ether. my brother younger 2 years is a marine and all my family rave on about him and my gf is an A level student and is joinin the raf as a medic she is sucsessful i get 40+ hrs a week of no human contact. […]
one guy, me, and love. the battle in life, love controls us. i never wanted to disaprear so badly until he came along… i love him. i want him but i cant have him, maybe thats why its all gone down hill.. i slit.. i cry.. everynight.. i never thought that growing up and falling inlove was so hard.. i was inlove before and told myself not to fall ever again… but then it happend, he made me feel like i could, like he would catch me.. we broke up because i was upset.. i got kicked out of my moms and house and […]
i dont think i cant do this anymore,i have to phisically confide my self inside my apartment or i will run, i will leave, and the cops will catch me, the only way people wont be able to control me anymore is if i kill myself,they will never let me off commitment,i will never get to move to california,i cant live like this for the rest of my life,all i think about is california, or getting recommited then taking sleeping pills and laying on the rail road tracks,and no the train driver would never know he hit me cause it would be dark outside,im going […]
since i was little, iv been everywere,lived in city after city, putting myself in placements so i could get away from the abuse,even wen noone wanted me,never could fit in,well i started running from treatment facilities and group homes,everytime they put me in a different city, i had the impulse to run,i would run so fast, i felt free, like noone could catch me,most people couldnt,im in my own palce now later on,i still have that adrenalin, i crave it, feeling the rush is like a drug to me,i love big cities and looking at all the tall buildings and everything around me,its like i […]
Hi there I checked into a nice hotel on the waterfront in Eastbourne to plan to grab a taxi to Beachy Head. Unfortunately I got to the cliff edge and was approached by the dreaded Chaplains who then proceeded to call the Police and I was put in a cell for 7 hrs “for my own safety”. Which was not a lot of fun. I was searched and detained. The cops were super pleasant and felt good that they had saved my ass. The police in Eastbourne are all oddly good looking and it was like a scene form csi NY.
I then was assessed by […]
i follow every single rule in place for me, why can i get out of the fucking system? then you get these lucky bitches who get off and they are in no shape or place to be and they go and do drugs or illigal shit,while im working my ass off, i want to run far away,but the only people that would even look for me is the cops,im 21 years old,i feel like a slave, slaves had to fight for there freedom to and thats exactly what im doing,i want so much in life that the average person that walksd past me gets, that […]
your entire life your told your crazy, while the ***** telling you that you are, is beating you to death in your own pool of blood,slamming your head into walls, floors,edges of bunkbed frames,doors,beating you in your privit parts, waiting untill your in the bathroom sitting on the toilet then she walks in and beats you there,tells you that you are nothing every single day of your life, meets guys off the internet, within two weeks, she moves in with them, and you find out , that they are child melesters, and your worker and your teachers that you tell every day dont ever do […]