Sometimes I just feel like I’m drowning in a endless pool of pain, & Horrible thoughts, and no one can see me struggle.
Tag:
drowning
I still have no idea what to do. I want more than anything to see my baby boy grow up. But this pain…I’m drowning. What did I do to deserve this. I didn’t want this. I was there for our baby when he wasn’t. Now he wants every other holiday…why didn’t he does this before the baby? We waited 3 years. As soon as we find out were expecting he all of a sudden hates me? What did I do? I didn’t want this. Holidays without my baby? I don’t know how to do that. I can’t do that. I feel selfish. I don’t want […]
For everyone out there who is struggling with suicidal thoughts and/or depression, I just want to ask you a question. Have you ever felt like this a drowning feeling? Because if I am the only one, that would be good information. Thanks.
So, I thought that KNOWING would help fix me – turns out, I think I’m drowning instead
i coudn’t manage it. all I did was cough and sputter. i guess i’ll have to think of an easier way
How I felt before
I see vivid colors of mossy greens and scarlet. Mysterious and wonderful lands. Flying through clouds, Purple jungles, diving into white water. Yellow wind. Beautiful people who laugh.
Then I wake.
I wake,and everything goes static. Its all gray. And I can’t breathe. Or think. I want to close my eyes and sleep and drift away into calm dream. Return to the clouds. The purple jungle. just lay in my bed and pull the white covers over my head and forget there ever was a place outside of my mind.
But I’m trapped.
I’m poisoned.
I’m drowning.
I’m drowning.
I’m drowning.
it is […]
I’m choking on the familiar cold in the air.. My lungs are beginning to shrink with every new breath I take.. I feel the tingling of the frost beginning in my fingers.. And I’m afraid.. Something I know so much of.., yet not enough knowledge could jump start my mind into the painful realization that I’m drowning.. Drowning in the sea and sun.. The water is suffocating but I see nothing but ice above me.. Preventing me from taking another fresh breath of a beautiful nothing called air.. And at that moment I begin to sink.. But I know the sun will melt the ice […]
Okay, so here it goes. Im nearing an ultimate moral downfall now. Ive went from fastening belts on my neck or swallowing a couple of pills to straight forward assaulting myself. I entirely despise my whole life. Life has caused me nothing but pain and suffering. Each day I struggle to wake up properly cause theres just no reason to go on doing things people usually do at all. I have closed myself inside my cage. I dont usually talk, Im not socializing anymore. Been abused in school, first sexually when I was 13, then bullied and some physical violence too. Parents beat me up […]
I went four months without feeling depressed. The waves started rolling in this past week and now I feel like I’m drowning under water. My chest hurts with the weight of the water and my lungs have filled with the ocean. The life that I had in me is being pulled out like salt dehydrating a body. Before long, I’ll just be another leaf floating in the sea.
I don’t know what to do
I’m drowning in love, sadness and pain.
I need to get out, I need to breathe.
I am so fed up, I dont even know if it is me or if it is the people around me. I just feel like sleeping and just not waking up. I dont know if it is because I stopped going to church that the feeling of my heart drowning is hurting more. I hate my life. I just want to jump off a cliff and see who actually misses me.
If it all worked out we would live in a different house.
We would live in a different town.
This is a brand new start; clear body, broken heart.
I’ll come visit you when I get the chance.
Breathing’s not easy when you’re underwater.
I am drowning and you’re keeping me under.
Close your eyes, sleep outside. it’s warmer than in here.
I’ll be fine, I’ll run and hide. I wish I could stay here.
You’re still in my head. my mind’s convinced that you never left.
I’m counting down till I see you next.
I still compare everything to your silhouette.
How can I forget what is […]
Feeling so alone right now. Been a deeper funk than usual the past couple of days and can’t get out of it. I want to be alone but I’m also lonely. I’m just drowning in my thoughts. I can’t shut my brain off. All i want to do is cut.
Hello everybody who may be reading this,
I just cannot stand life anymore, anyplace I live it’s the same… I’m just drowning down, deeper every day and I feel so alone… I cannot even get proper sleep anymore and I’m just able to cry… It’s tiring and depressing.
I cannot take it anymore. This year I have experienced the loss of two friends, my grandad and my closest friend. I cannot cope with any more loss. Nobody cares that inside I am drowning and cannot cope all they see is themselves and all my mother can talk about is the one loss she has experienced this year. Anything I say is wrong and I am a failure I just want to die
everytime i close my eyes, it´s like i dont know.. im drowning in my own thoughts… it´s like im a prisoner in my own mind.. does anyone feel the same here?
It comes in waves, I close my eyes, hold my breath and let it bury me.
I’m not okay and it’s not all right; ¿Won’t you drag the lake and bring me home again?
I’m not technically suicidal. I just wish I were dead. The relief. Or someone else who is normal. I am bipolar and I cannot be genuine in relationships. I cannot date. I keep myself to myself on my personal time. My best friends are all those I had as a young child. I was always funny (what fucked up person isn’t the funniest?) At work I am the funny hard worker. You’ll never see me bring depression or sadness into the workplace. No one would have a clue I’m drowning in my own ego. My friends don’t know anything. One actually complimented me just last […]
I’ve heard somewhere that people with some form of disability usually end up having dysfunctional relationship. Not because their physical disability, though it’s a factor too, but because of their world view. they usually misconstrued “hanging out”as real romantic affection. this usually happens when there is a deep seeded inacceptance (if that’s a word) of themselves. And when someone lends a helping hand or acts sympathetic, they feel as though they have finally found a person that is better than them(only in the sense that the person is accepting), and so, worthy of their love.
what I’ve found about myself is that, because I am…highly […]
I’m running late
The meaning of life is fading away
The thoughts of suicide is overwhelming
I’m dead i just forgot to stop breathing
I’m drowning in my own thoughts
I’m an empty shell, I’ve lost my soul
everything is going away
everything is taking away
I’m loosing it all
I’m starting to fall
Who can be my savior
Oh wait i’m already lost
y.t