so when I was 9 I started getting bullied really badly I eventually only had two friends and that was that, all I had on my schedule was crying, being bullied, and crying. then when I was 10 i thought things were getting better but they just4 got worse, my grandma started dying and I loved her dearly. and i missed a few days of school cause i was at the hospital with her. people started to leave me alone a bit and I even started to get more friends. but that didn’t last long. in 5th grade this girl came to my school […]
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Grandma
I know I already did, but this time, I’ll do it in songs! How fun! Hahaha. Anyways, we’ll start from when my grandpa died, and my dad almost died: Hello by Evanescence. I can’t explain how it relates, but that’s what I always listen to. Next up, when my dog died. My Last Breath by Evanescence. Again, the events of her death really go along with the song. After she died, I found a song that I would sing when I missed her. It’s: Goodbye My Friend by Linda Ronstadt. Then, my grandma went insane and hates me. For this, I kinda think of Imaginary […]
I understand that it seems like I just want to kill myself or whatever when a guy is  mean to me, but that’s just part of it. I’m already right at the edge. I’ve gone through seeing people die since I was 4. I didn’t understand it then, but I did at 8, when my grandpa died. He died right in front of me. Of course, that messed me up. Then I only had one grandparent, because my other grandpa had pretty much disowned my family after the death of my grandma on my mom’s side (the death when I was 4). So all I […]
My great grandma died 2 years ago and i think its hitting me the most right now more than it did when she actually died i hate to say it but tbh i really didnt care when she died and now i look back and remember the good and bad days we had together i kno my mum really misses her we talk about her alot i write her email adress every day it always sends back and says it was an error so i dont really kno if its a waist of time or if she is an angel and gets to read it […]
(**imagine any name**) And I am 11. I am female, and attend Middle School.
I remember,in 2007, when I was 6, I had just gotten home from school. I was happy, and I thought nothing would get in my way. That all changed the next day, Saturday. I had learned about death when my Uncle died. He died in 2004. Strangley, I remember everything. At he funeral, everyone was eating, and drinking lemonade, after honoring him. I was crushed. My older brothers best friend? My best friend? I would never see him again. I cried every night. He sed to help me sleep too. He […]
So number two, my grandad.
I’ve already mentioned him briefly but I shall give you a bit more detail.
He was always ill, but it never seemed to phase him. I think in total he suffered 2 strokes, 1 “mini” stroke, a heart attack, several ongoing illnesses and probably some other things. For about the last five years he has been in about out of hospital and nursing homes for people recovering but he never really did recover. As well as being ill we think he had dementia, he often forgot where he was, who we were and even our names. That hurt, a lot. But anyway […]
Hey I’m new to this but there are some things I need to get off my chest. I’m sorry if I offend anyone or just generally upset/piss people off.
So I’ll start from the beginning.
From a very young age I didn’t really have a “normal” family. My parents divorced when I was a few months old so for a couple of years it was just me, my mum and my brother. My dad was always in my life, more so now than he used to be, but still he was around. When I was about two we moved in with my stepdad. He has two sons […]
Honestly. I have such a broken heart, even if I’m 13. Who the fuck cares? I can’t feel loss at “such a young age”?? You try living my life, see what YOU think this is. I’m not weak. I was weak once. But I grew up. That’s right. 8 years old. My grandpa died, I had to grow up. Within 5 minutes, I was completely mature. I had to be. My grandma just lost it. I had to take care of my little sister. Of course, I was barking orders, but I had to. I pushed the feelings down. I was a drill sergeant for […]
I have grown closer to my mom but she broke that bond yesterday when you yelled at me about my grades. I have a step-dad and I hate him, I know it is a strong word but he has made this family worse than it already is. My brother always puts me down and he always gets the highest preaise cause he is smarter and he get good grades, he is in 4th grade. This family means nothing to me anymore and the only person I really love is my grandma cause she loves me and she cares about me and she doesnt bring me […]
Finally, weekend! I don’t quite know if I really like it or not, but it just sounds nice 😛 Today was a busy day for me, because I went to my grandma. I really didn’t want to, but after long talks with my parents I let myself be persuaded. We went by car, we never do that because she lives like 1,5 Miles away. The reason was that I am afraid to start cycling, because I haven’t in 2 months because of a knee injury. Still we stayed for only half an hour, I really didn’t liked it. All the questions from my grandma like: […]
My life has always been messed up. The earliest memory I can remember was of my mum holding one of my arms and dragging my out the front door of my first home and my other hand reaching out for my dad who stood and watched. I was screaming and crying. I didn’t want to go.
I’ve lived in many homes since my mum and dad got divorced. And mum has had many boyfriends. One was Gavin who had a son. They were really nice at first but I got scared of Gavin. One day during one of Their arguments I was hungry so I […]
Yesterday I went to a family Christmas party on my mom’s side of the family.
Two years ago this party was something my entire family attended, all 5 of my sisters and I would go together, with our parents. We were all there every single year, together.
However since that time, everything has changed. My 19 year old sister was kicked out of my family when she was 17 causing my parents to accuse anyone trying to help my sister of taking sides. Because of my parents choices, I wasn’t allowed to see my sister, grandma, aunt, or cousins, except for once or twice a year. […]
I can’t get this feeling to go away. I feel bitter, I feel lost, I feel helpless.. I want to drink myself into a coma. I try so hard to make everyone happy even though everything is literally falling apart all around me. My best friend’s sister died 3 months ago in a drunk driving accident, she was 19.  even though we weren’t that close, she was still like an older sister to me. and I have never seen someone so young and so beautiful be so still and so lifeless. she didn’t even look like herself at all.. it haunts me everyday, all I can […]
I haven’t been here for a while. And honestly, when I came back, I wasn’t expecting much of any attention. I nearly thought this was going to be like facebook, with people saying ‘oh u shuldn’t b sad all the time u shuld b happi!’ but no.
Instead? People are supportive. Encouraging to live, not die. I was wrong about this place. Maybe this is a new leaf being turn? Or some sort of phrase like that, I don’t know..
But for those who are/may be concerned, life has gotten to a standstill. I’m neither happy nor sad on this year’s holidays. Maybe it’s for the best […]
The shooting today.. 20 kids dead… 6 adults it brought up so many memories, that may have even no relation.
First the shock that someone can hurt kids so innocent.. then i remember my past 2 people hurt me.. when i was so young.. to innocent to protect myself. At their entire control, my life was basically in there hands…
Then i thought of how these kids would suffer 5-10 years from now. Like i do today, the symptoms of my PTSD have cause severe depression, anxiety, insomnia, psudo siezures, multiple persanality disorder, and bipolar. I agree some of these may not have been a direct result, […]
is this site real, its my first time here. today 20 children were murdered in ct, usa. it is very sad to hear this happening. christmas is almost here and i have no money, i have 3 beautiful daughters that i cant afford to feed let alone buy gifts for christmas. i lost my job in november i have terrible credit and im behind on my rent. i have tried so hard to make things good and i always lose everything. im not suicidal but im very ready to go. i have nothing to live for, i look forward to sleep so i can dream. […]
My parents started to fight ever since I could remember. Â My father was abusive to my mother, not to me though. Still he screamed at me, kept me up all night telling me I was just a kid. HE broke chairs, smashed the house, broke my stuff, and hurt my mother very badly. I joined drama class at school, and he told me I couldn’t act. He crushed my dreams, and makes me feel worthless. All of my school days I have been bullied. The called me names, took away my jacket when it was cold, called me a lesbian, a wore, a fucking loser, […]
my mother just wants to take everything away from me. she put my other mom in jail so now i have no where to live cuz i sure as hell aint living at home! my grandma said that she was gonna move in with me in January so i dont have to live with my mom
Im actually kinda happy right now which is really really wierd for me haha. Im happy cause im in an amazing relationship with this amazing guy 🙂 hi lifeishorrible <3 haha but at the same time im worried about my great-grandma whose 100 yrs old, ses in the hospital and it doesnt look like shes gonna make it….i guess you cant have happiness without an equal amount of sadness