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by Roak 8/22/2013

written by Roak

At the risk of identifying myself to anyone who knows me..

I had a woman come up to me a couple weeks ago and casually,comfortably,awkwardly tell me that she had followed me off a city bus a couple years ago in a snowstorm after exchanging smiles. To clarify, she was beautiful in the way that i like. The whole experience was so wholly unexpected…. thatÂ I honestly questioned whether or not i had imagined it

Kind of sobering.. I found it easier to believe that i had suddenly become delusional enough to imagine this.. than it actually happening.

So she asked me if i remembered her… If i […]

8/22/2013 0 comment

Anxiety

by Lover4evr 8/6/2013

written by Lover4evr

In 3rd grade, I was told by my doctor that I had anxieties. I was going home from school everyday sick to my stomach due to my constant worrying. My father hadn’t contacted me in awhile and it was the first thing that had me worried so bad at a young age. I was making myself really sick and I’d have panic attacks. As I got older, I struggled with more teenage problems. My anxieties were at an ultimate high. I’m sixteen years old and can barely drive a car because I get worried about everything I’m doing and I have a panic attack and […]

8/6/2013 3 comments

Reaching Out

by RUG 8/2/2013

written by RUG

Why do we reach out to those that have harmed us?

Is it somehow an innate desire inside that they will change and see the error of their ways and realize that after years of degrading us, we’re actua lly worth something?

Dad used to scold me for my self-worth being low, but he kept contributing to it by making fun of my weight, or my bleeding issues. Â How could a Registered Nurse be so cruel, knowing, as a biology major, that the health issues I have are pretty severe?

The truth is, they weren’t severe because he didn’t want to foot the doctor bill. Â Years later, they’re […]

8/2/2013 1 comment

How I felt 3 days ago

by Shaynax 8/2/2013

written by Shaynax

Trying to kill myself was the best thing that couldâ€™ve happened. Because if I hadnâ€™t tried to and if I hadnâ€™t failed, I wouldnâ€™t feel the urge to change how I felt and I wouldnâ€™t have gone to Four Winds. It was tricky, I had just enough of the Nortatryptaline to go into coma but I just ended sleeping for a straight 48 hours. I then didnâ€™t leave my house for an entire week and was drinking so much, I decided physical pain would have been the answer to everything. I cut the word help into my arm and cried myself to sleep that night. […]

8/2/2013 1 comment

i dont even know.

by JKburnett 7/22/2013

written by JKburnett

I don’t have to much screwed up in my life but i still feel like i serve no purpose and every time i think about it i know that there’s gonna be someone whos happy that im gone. but every time i think this i remember my life a year ago. at that time i was on so much bullshit. I judged people on how they looked and i just walked around acting like i knew everything and just didn’t care and didn’t see and deep meaning in life and just treated it like something that was a joke. then the week of my birthday […]

7/22/2013 0 comment

Imagine Suicide.

by idkanymoresorry 6/22/2013

written by idkanymoresorry

Wanna commit suicide? Imagine this.

You come home from school one day. You’ve had yet another horrible experience. You were bullied, teased, etc. You go to get your blades, pills, rope, anything. You go get that suicide note that you wrote forever ago. You thought you would never use it. So did everyone else. You cut yourself so deep. The blood won’t stop. You take 5 extra pills. You tie the rope around your neck. You tie it to the ceiling fan. You’re dead. There’s no going back. Your parents get home from work, your siblings home from school. They call your name like a normal […]

6/22/2013 6 comments

you’ll find them â™¥

by smiling 6/18/2013

written by smiling

in my last post I wrote that I found this special person who helped me a lot in my life. he’s the reason I can write this. I won’t know what happened if I hadn’t met him.

some people say “you’re lucky to find someone like him” “I won’t find THIS person” and so on.

but you will find a person like I found him. there’s a special person for everybody out there.

what will happen if you end your life? you can’t see so much beautiful things: think how beautiful you’ll look in your promdress or even your little sister, the moment when you look in someone’s […]

6/18/2013 8 comments

I Can’t, Anymore.

by quiet_hearts 6/12/2013

written by quiet_hearts

I am 25 years old. I have always had problems with depression, with self-harm; I’ve attempted suicide twice, and I promised myself that the third time would be the last; I won’t mess it up, next time. The third time will be the end.

The third time is all I can think about lately. I have lost everything, these past few months. Two years ago, I moved 1000 miles away from home; away from all my family, who spent my entire childhood abusing and neglecting me, and away from all my toxic friends that only dragged me down into their messes. I wanted a fresh start; […]

6/12/2013 2 comments

The Truth About Me

by TheTruth 3/18/2013

written by TheTruth

I’m that guy that has been shit on more than anybody knows. Early days as a kid I was harassed daily and tormented by fellow classmates because of my mothers crack addiction. The only reason they knew was because their parents did drugs along with my mother. Was born with a bad foot which pretty much opted me out of any sports or doing well as I could. Shyness throughout the years was difficult to deal with as I learned to talk to females and learn what they wanted and what they saw. My father has been in prison all my life and haven’t read […]

3/18/2013 1 comment

I wanted to reply “yes”.

by hazelleyes 2/1/2013

written by hazelleyes

I feel drained.

All my energy is being drained by that dark hole I so often talk about.

To whoever said it will get better, well fuck you, cus it doesn’t. It just keeps getting harder. And I keep getting weaker.

My bestfriend today texted me “did you die?”. And I know she didn’t mean anything wrong, whatsoever (she doesn’t know how I feel or how badly I want to die), she was just saying that cus I hadn’t said anything all day (well, given that I woke up at 8pm, it’s understandable). But, as I looked at that text I just wanted to reply “YES“, and I […]

2/1/2013 12 comments

Suicide seems so convenient.

by sono_libero 1/31/2013

written by sono_libero

I have nothing to look forward to.

I have it all planned out.

It would work this time.

I have no friends.

It was confirmed yesterday.

Do you remember several weeks ago when I said that I hadnâ€™t killed myself because I was afraid of disappointing two people?

My art teacher and my track coach.

But I have ruined that now.

And I have disappointed both of them.

Neither of them have any particular interest in me anyways.

I have no idea what to do with my life.

No one to help me.

No one who genuinely cares.

No one who has said that they love me in a long, long time.

It would be so easy.

Easy and […]

1/31/2013 3 comments

complicated feels man..

by b1urr 1/17/2013

written by b1urr

i’m the type of person who hesitates to kill myself because i still have faith that maybe something good can happen. so i make a little agreement with myself; if nothing happens, if i’m not ever happy, within 2-3 months, i will die. every time i’ve done this i’ve met a wonderful person who seemed to be capable of being a good enough friend to make me decide to live an extra 3 or so months.

now that i’m with my girlfriend, this something goodÂ will nearly always be present which means i’m “safe” for a bit (or forever if she stays with me that long). but […]

1/17/2013 6 comments

I’m not exactly sure what to say

by opcomeback 1/13/2013

written by opcomeback

I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m so lost and it’s such a long story I don’t know where to begin. There’s this boy and I’ve known him for a little over a year now. We became very fast friends and I told him everything. The first day we ever really talked I told him everything. I was sexually abused as a child, I was raped multiple times by a man I called my grandfather. He told me his life story, his troubled past with his parents, his horrible past relationship. We talked every day, all day. I moved to his city and got […]

1/13/2013 5 comments

Numb

by mysmilecoversalot :) 12/29/2012

written by mysmilecoversalot :)

Yesterday I went to a family Christmas party on my mom’s side of the family.

Two years ago this party was something my entire family attended, all 5 of my sisters and I would go together, with our parents. We were all there every single year, together.

However since that time, everything has changed. My 19 year old sister was kicked out of my family when she was 17 causing my parents to accuse anyone trying to help my sister of taking sides. Because of my parents choices, I wasn’t allowed to see my sister, grandma, aunt, or cousins, except for once or twice a year. […]

12/29/2012 1 comment

As my username suggests I’m back.. going to post my story again..

by ImBack 12/27/2012

written by ImBack

Well I think its time to tell people why I cut and why I think Iâ€™m depressed. It starts off like all the rest, happy family, with money, love ect.. When I was about four years of age I was working in the farm with my daddy and my sixteen year old cousin, my dad left to get some food for the cattle, I was sitting on a lump of hay. My cousin comes up to me and starts fingering me. It was not a good experience for me and I couldnâ€™t get him to stop. I think he would have gone a lot further […]

12/27/2012 2 comments

I need help….

by XxFalse.SmilexX 11/6/2012

written by XxFalse.SmilexX

I have been depressed before. I know what it’s like. I have even cut before but nothing has ever hurt as bad as I feel now. I cut again for the first time Sunday night. I hadn’t cut for at least 3 years before, my mom found out and got me help last time. I won’t/can’t let her find out again. I want help but I don’t want to disappoint my mom again. I don’t hate my life I just hate what I a having to deal with. I don’t want to die but I am tired of living. I am not someone who deals […]

11/6/2012 10 comments

I’m done.

by loreildarksky 11/2/2012

written by loreildarksky

I can’t help it. I just can’t stand it anymore. I’m so alone… There’s no one for me. No one to care, no one to help, no one to even just see.

My friends have been ignoring me, and I don’t know why. I know I’ve snapped a few times, but they have too. And now, one of them, one of the two who mean the most to me, hates me–at the very least. I want to say is was because he wouldn’t communicate with me. I feel like he’s blaming me for everything that happened, and I hate it. I get blamed for enough […]

11/2/2012 1 comment

Time is ticking.

by jjgirl13 10/25/2012

written by jjgirl13

Does anyone else feel pathetic posting here? I do, every time I do.

Well, I’m past due. Way past my date of expiry. I have it set up that if I don’t reply to a text by the end of the day, the cops are going to come busting through my door. And the cops have done that already twice this year, it’d be too embarrassing if I were alive to greet them. Last time they came by, I had three of them stomping around in my room, snooping, while I stared at the traces of vomit that had dried up on the hardwood floor, hoping […]

10/25/2012 8 comments

The Big Day

by help wanted 9/16/2012

written by help wanted

Well today’s the day. Sunday. The planÂ was to end my life tonight. Leaving a couple different notes addressed to different people. I’ve wanted to do this for a long time. Planning since the beginning of the school year, which started August 27, the day before my birthday. The plan was to wait until after my parents went to sleep, then go do it. My method is not the mostÂ preferred method out there, in fact many people hate it and think it’s like THE WORST one. But I have my reasons and I have tried twice before, failing obviously. Waking up in a hospital room surrounded […]

9/16/2012 16 comments

New uderstanding

by balancedhope 7/30/2012

written by balancedhope

I went crazy yesterday.

Â Mom brought home the one who irrates me so. We had an agreement that I would get advanced warning we she was bringing him home. Yesterday she had left a message on my phone. I had be working in the barn and hadn’t had my phone with me.Â There’s a longer story but I ended getting upset and lost my ability to talk and think straight. I tried to contain myself/felt an explosion inside. Ended up mucking up two of my belongings(silently with no audience-it was the best I could do).

Today, he’s back again. Today there was not even a call before. […]

7/30/2012 0 comment

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