Junk fucked grunge and grime and became punk in time followed by this dope laced rhyme is blue lips and rolled back eyes with a rope tied tight you might find the right side of life when every body is done crying at your funeral they go back home and do the same thing as you but they don’t understand the point of view you had and why you choose to tie ropes to rocks and throw those hopes over the beam tied real tight so you could kick the chair from under your feet in the same place under that bridge you used […]
Does any one use heroin and feel like they finally don’t want to kill them self? I do. When I get clean from it and I’m sober, I want to die again. What’s the point of me getting sober if I still want to die? Why not just keep using heroin and running from my suicidal and self destructive tendencies? At least that way I’m still alive for the selfish fucks that insist I don’t kill my self. But they’re not happy enough that I’m still alive, they don’t want me on heroin. But they don’t understand, the heroin preserves my life. I’m alive because […]
My parents never talked to me and dismissed my problems because they are too perfect for their kid to have flaws I guess. I am a weird kid. I never kissed a girl, never had friends, never had a childhood and I guess I never grew out of it.
A new employee at work is a girl who is the friendliest person I ever met. On her first day she introduced herself to me and she seemed genuinely interested about me and she was smiling. She always smiles. Few days later a coworker told me that she said that I’m smart and nice.
She is my cure […]
I’m not doing it now. But I always have a plan. When there’s no one left to give up on me but myself, I’m gong to do it.
I’m a little bit new to this whole blogging my feelings thing, but i can’t keep it to myself anymore. I hate myself, i dont know how or wen i did, or i think maybe i always have. I dont think ive ever been happy. When I was really little it was me my mom my dad and my little brother. I always try and remember my childhood as being happy and i’m always that one person to point out the good in any situation, but it’s time i tell the truth. My dad was a rug addict. my dad did crack and cocaine and […]
It destroys you
I am 18 years old, I am a recovering intervenes drug addict , I was shooting up morphine and oxy cotton when I was 16 resulting in shooting up heroine at 17 , just months ago I came to Nova Scotia to become sober , in all honesty I travelled from one province to another to make some money selling my ass for some cash, it turned bad and I ended up showing on my Aunts doorstep , strung out begging not to send me back to newfoundland. where the depth of my addiction began , Eventually things began to change around here , I would […]
I explained in my last post how many of my problems are congenital: that i’m extremely stupid, unattractive, physically undeveloped, and have no personality. The pain from this reality is escalating and i’m becoming increasingly angry at the world for it’s lack of empathy. For example, I’ve been to the cinema twice in the past two weeks and on both occasions people sitting opposite have laughed at me and called me a spastic/retard because of the way I stare at the screen and snicker repeatedly at funny moments because I’m too afraid to talk. I’m sick of sales assistants and security guards who glare at me […]
I am only 25 but I feel like suicide has become the only option for me. I want to share my story with you and I hope you’ll give me an honest response on whether it suicide seems acceptable in my case.
My life has always been fucked up. My mum was schizophrenic and an alcoholic. From the post natal depression she was deemed unfit to care for us and I went through several foster families who abused and physically attacked me. She died from liver poisoning when I was 5. My dad took my brother and I in for two years but we lived in […]
I guess I shouldn’t really feel abandoned, as I still have all of my family and they’ve been right by my side since day one.
This is my first post on here, so excuse me if I’m not correct in going about it.
My boyfriend died two days shy of a month ago. It could have been a suicide, it could have been an accident. Seeing as we were both highly sexual people and I found him hung up on a door with a belt around his neck and his pants down, auto-erotic asphyxiation doesn’t seem to be out of the question. But he was suicidal and […]
I always envied and despised stupid people around me. Why do they get to be happy? Why was I always told being smart is a good thing?? It’s not a good thing. Being smart is a curse. The smarter you are the more socially awkward you are. Especially being a smart kid. Stupid kids become stupid adults and they are the ones that get to enjoy the meaningless pleasantries of life. Being smart sucks. The dumbest stupidest assholes have the most friends and screw like damn bunnies. Why can’t I have 500 friends and screw 24/7…. It’s a curse. being smarter than 9/10 people is […]
Love is after us 24/7 . But in the end ,you ended up in Hell…if
you make that fault mistake ………………… but mine you ,you’ll
 still be in Love. I am Human but I bleed just like everyone
else. When she has her trying days, I listened to the rocks and
stones that come my way. Â Is this Love? Love is who you,
Surrender too. Whoever ,you think you where. That’s when
ever thing changes, when Love, comes knocking on your
door. Love blinded you to a Fault, it Trust everything. It has
Faith in honor, without question. Believing is to convince
your mind, that the heart in your soul is safe  ,and that […]
FUCKED FOR CASH
V1-
Cum splattered face
Wash away the taste
Fake a slutty smile
And bend over now
Give yourself up
For a couple bucks
For your next fix
From your fucking pimp
V2-
Caught in a web
Where everyone is dead
But walking, fucking
Making money
Take it in the ass
Oh so bloody
Pitiful waste
Prostitution
Chorus-
How did we
End up here?
Hooked on coke
And fucking queers
Make more money
Giving head
In an alley
Mostly dead
V3-
Did you ask for this?
Heroin cysts
Black eyes from guys
You fucked last night
One too much
Raped and fucked
Left alone
You have no […]
I read that when you have an orgasm that it is impossible for you to feel any pain, i had this idea that the moment you reach orgasm would be a good time to stab yourself through the heart or jump by hanging, when i cum it lasts for well over 1 minute which might be ideal for the athame through the flames..
I read this scientific study of what happens to the human brain when a person is having an orgasm & in the brain scan the studies showed that the […]
I’ve recently started truly considering ending things.
I met the woman of my dreams and fell head over heels in love with her. She was beautiful and amazing and felt like the woman I felt I deserved. So like an idiot I rushed foolishly into marriage with her. And immediately after getting married she changed into a totally different person. She started having conversations on her phone with guys talking about how they wanted to hook up with her and she would go along with it. So we ended up arguing and fighting about it but she took it way beyond just a fight. So she […]
I lost, I give up now. How much more can I take? you keep pushing me, never have I ever feel so defeated, you won. I heard it’s so easy to OD, just heroin and alcohol, right? such beautiful peaceful departure, no more of this agonizing pain. I won’t have live my life anymore, for it is such a misery and so lonely, now and forever. Why do I have to put up with this if I don’t want to? Isn’t it at least my choice to want out? Why is suicide so bad? Why do you think people who committed it or want to […]
I dunno. Life man. I’m so burnt out on this shit. In the past I made a lot of mistakes and now they are finally catching up with me. I have never been happy, but I try. When I was younger I was the fat kid and everybody picked on me. So I had no friends. Then I went to college, did a bunch of drugs, and ended up in a psyche ward. I got my shit together after that and went back to the university. Then I met a girl. Well, I loved her, […]
So I’m know I’m not the only one who is actively wishing and hoping that my life turns around soon and I magically become happy, or simply find a few real world (offline) friends to ease the feelings of loneliness….and yet while waiting for this to happen, wouldn’t mind if my life would just end.
I do not want to “commit suicide” though, because I know the pain this causes from family experience and I don’t want my family to know I was selfish enough to do that to them. Â But drugs – well an accidental overdose isn’t QUITE the same. If I overdose on pills, […]
Ive been mixing alcohol with heroin and tying a bag around my head. at first my bag was too small so id fall asleep with it off. i got a bigger bag (30 gal) and managed to fall asleep with it on. I apparently took it off while unconscious. Idk if i should tie it tighter or abandon this method for something preferable. id jump but i live in a very flat city. maybe i should just do a ton of heroin. its pretty nice. hard for me to keep down a proper amount of alcohol tho so im quite discouraged
I’m about to od on heroin, sorry I never got to know any of yall, but I wish u all the luck in the world. It’s this or fosterhome all my relatives are now dead and in another country. I might as well die too, peace. xoxoxo
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