Tag:

inside

accepting the monster inside

by Alan Ominous 2/16/2016

written by Alan Ominous

Faced some harsh truths this weekend. I’m probably just as, if not more heartless than I perceive those around me. The deep angry hatred for everything is growing. I’m conflicted. How can I be so full of hate and be so empty?

I’ve committed some unspeakable atrocity. In the name of self righteous vengeance. The sad reality, I’m not capable of hating anyone more than I hate myself.

My, wife, surely abuses me. But I guess I deserve it. I’m a terrible person. I’ve done and do despicable things. I have nothing good to give anyone.

I tried to kill myself long before her. I will again whether […]

2/16/2016 6 comments

The modest, empty shell.

by Kay-Kay 2/12/2016

written by Kay-Kay

Do you ever feel like there is nothing left for you to do,
That everything inside of you has been let go of and you can’t fix yourself anymore than you have tried?
Believing in yourself had an expiration date for me; the day I was born.
Or maybe it was the day I realized I could never be a kid in my family. That I would always have to be some part-adult to take care of the adults around me. And with all of this responsibility I lost myself along the way, I was eliminated and there was no telling to what I had […]

2/12/2016 0 comment

hopeless

by Alan Ominous 2/8/2016

written by Alan Ominous

Really just feel stuck against a wall. I’m joined to someone who wants to fix me. Sure my emotions can be intense. Ups and downs, but I’m OK with that. I have my vices and quirks. I’m OK with those too. They continually force me into shoes that don’t fit, then go off when I express discomfort. They bleed all the joy from the little things in life, they work diligently to prevent the bigger ones. Then mock my misery.

They sit me down for “serious time” to get to a deeper level of understanding. History has proven that just refills their arsenal to use against […]

2/8/2016 8 comments

Questioning loneliness

by Moneypenny 2/7/2016

written by Moneypenny

So why does that strange feeling of loneliness is so powerful and confusing?

Lots of people here relate to it.

But sometimes we can be alone and by ourselves without it hurting us, without it even matter.

And then agaim we can be surrounded by people and yet feel we are doomed by the solitude inside us.

What is it all about? How can it make us feel so bad, so wrong, so worthless?

2/7/2016 14 comments

Feb 1 2016

by 6loody 2/1/2016

written by 6loody

Hello,

Hopefully your having a ok day, but if your on here your probably not feeling good, I feel so dead inside, ever since my girlfriend broke up with me 3 weeks ago, I’m so unhappy, report cards came out Friday, I’m not doing any good and ugh, life is just so hard. Everyday I get older I see how screwed up the world is and it disgusts me, and I want to start up a Youtube channel but I don’t know if I should, on there I’m thinking to upload skate boarding videos, skits, Q&As and things to help out my future audience with life

Share how […]

2/1/2016 1 comment

Patterns

by DaylightFades 2/1/2016

written by DaylightFades

I feel terrible for pushing him away; for the way I push and shove and keep him at a distance.

I’ve done this dozens of times. He won’t let me do it to him, he says. I laugh because they all say that.

I self-destruct. I don’t know what to do with my pain, and so I turn it back on myself. I make them leave, then I tell myself I deserved it, that it was bound to happen.

It’s been three months. Three months of calling me beautiful, inside and out. From stopping my wounds from bleeding out with his bare hands. Telling me he can handle […]

2/1/2016 2 comments

Protected: Dam Broke Tonight

by whiskered-fish 1/31/2016

written by whiskered-fish

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

1/31/2016 26 comments

Dying Inside :/

by Counting The Days Until I'm gone 1/30/2016

written by Counting The Days Until I'm gone

Though outwardly I may appear to be happy really and truly, I’m dying inside. There’s that one straw that breaks the camel’s back or so they say. If so.I welcome the straw and the harbinger of death. Waiting patiently for that straw. Then I’m gone and I will not suffer anymore.

1/30/2016 2 comments

e m p t y

by darkest_souls 1/29/2016

written by darkest_souls

i feel empty

i feel nothing

i feel like nothing

there’s a void

a hole

and i don’t know how to fill it

how to fill this hole inside me

so deep

and dark

i feel no fear

i feel no sadness

i feel no happiness

no life

who am i???

1/29/2016 6 comments

Protected: sometimes, when i was little,

by whiskered-fish 1/28/2016

written by whiskered-fish

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

1/28/2016 2 comments

tempt…

by nonexistingsoul 1/22/2016

written by nonexistingsoul

Yesterday I was at the condo unit of my friend with some blockmates. We decided to hang out there. They have 3 doubled deck. I lay down on the top bed near the window. I tried opening the window but they were mad at me. Maybe they know that I might jump out of the window. They know how crazy and mad I am. But I told them I wouldn’t jump. Not yet. And they let me open it but they were guarding me. I opened it and took my feet out. I looked down. I was very tempted to jump. It’s like I can […]

1/22/2016 2 comments

HELP ME

by Lawli 1/22/2016

written by Lawli

I spend so much time daydreaming it’s like I live another life inside my head. I have daydreamed for as long as I can remember, all through primary school and I’m now in High school (15 years old). It has never bothered me that much in the past, I mean it would keep me from missing a lot in class but I never thought it was really that bad – until now. Now I just feel like I have another life inside my head, at first it didn’t cross my mind but now it’s stuffing up my head. I want it all to stop, I […]

1/22/2016 2 comments

Maybe..

by nonexistingsoul 1/21/2016

written by nonexistingsoul

I finally finished reading My Heart and Other Black Holes by Jasmine Warga. After reading it, it makes me rethink about suiciding. It makes me think that maybe I can be fixed back again. That maybe I can recover. That maybe I can still be saved. But I think what I’m feeling right now is just temporary. I know tomorrow I’ll be depress all over again. But I know somewhere deep inside me, I’m begging to be saved from this black hole.

1/21/2016 3 comments

To that point

by justanothergirl09 1/10/2016

written by justanothergirl09

On Wednesday it was Challenge Day.

I had turned in a permission slip so I was called down to the gym.

When I walked in I was terrified. I only knew one person in there and she had her own friends so it was like I was alone. Everyone sat in this big circle in the middle of the gym. I thought we would have to talk in front of everyone. I cringed every time they said we would play a game.

As time passed, (I was still scared but not as much) we were told to get in our assigned groups. In the beginning of that activity, […]

1/10/2016 2 comments

Friends called me a psychopath today

by blank-clutter 1/7/2016

written by blank-clutter

I am trying to keep it together and not express anything that would show how angry and sad I am all the time. I feel like I have terrible thoughts and urges but Im trying to keep it all inside because I dont want to hurt anyone. Today during dinner my roomates were having a conversation and I was thinking I wish I could participate better. I wish I could have a proper conversation and be engaged like normal people are. Instead I was just playing with my napkin. I eventually started ripping and tearing it. They pointed out, you know psychopaths do that, then […]

1/7/2016 8 comments

I feel so alone

by kbking6 1/6/2016

written by kbking6

I feel so alone, no one to talk to, no one to understand. I am going insane with my resent brake up.. She left me for another man and had no same in saying she has slept with him multiple times already.. I can not face this pressure and anger building up inside of me. I am crazy about this girl and always will be, but she has just shut me off.. Can’t wait to die

1/6/2016 9 comments

The 13th House

by Zetsumei 1/2/2016

written by Zetsumei

Hello, everyone. This is a short play about fear and its meaning. The first act is called Reckoning.

The curtain rises and Zetsumei is seen sitting in a chair and is drinking something in a wine glass while reading a newspaper illuminated by a single light. He then takes out a cell phone and calls several people about a new attraction that opened up recently. The light slowly dims as Zetsumei smirks while the wine glass slips from his fingers and breaks on the ground.

The next day Zetsumei is seen staring at a cliched haunted house attraction then says, “Hello, everyone” before turning around. Zetsumei sees […]

1/2/2016 3 comments

I’m so sad

by nicole123 1/2/2016

written by nicole123

I’ve been in bed all day . I feel absolutely nothing.

Except sadness . I wish I had people that loved me , friends .

Anything to make a light brighten inside me .

I can’t stay home any longer. I think I am going to go downtown and get coffee and see if people are playing music . I love it down there . In the arts district. People just play jazz on the streets. No one pays them any mind except me .

That’s how I feel. No one pays me any mind .

Today is hard . I wish my time was up.

1/2/2016 7 comments

4:28 am

by nicole123 1/2/2016

written by nicole123

I’m writing this and it’s early as fuck.

I can’t sleep. I just made a grilled cheese too an it was great. Early in the morning is when my thoughts are crazy.

I was thinking about how I feel like the day I die my soul will finally find peace . It will be a relief . I’ll finally get to rest. I wish the day could come sooner.

I was also thinking about a afterlife . I wouldn’t say that I believe in God , but I believe in something . I hope there is something after this world . Maybe this life is hell? There has […]

1/2/2016 3 comments

I feel like a terrible person

by blank-clutter 1/2/2016

written by blank-clutter

I feel terrible inside myself and I don’t think it’s going to go away. I feel like I’m just a bad person who generates negative and bad thoughts. I’ve seen people in bad situations, depressed because something bad has happened to them, but inside they are great and positive. They would want good things for themselves and other. I don’t feel like something like that. I feel like I’m the thing that causes all the problems that are in my life. Im the bringer of bad energy and I truly wish I was never born 🙁

1/2/2016 5 comments

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