I hate that I am overweight and that especially lately I comfort eat a hell of a lot. I hate my appearance -the fact I have naturally curly hair is a curse, I wish I had a cuter nose and a generally more feminine looking face, my appearance is top of my list of reasons of why I want to die, I hate the way women are treated in society in general-mainly valued for appearance and that fake beauty is valued more than natural beauty seems a lot of people find a woman’s un made up face unacceptable, I hate how weak I […]
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I used to think I was just lazy but after reading about depression the majority of the symptoms describe me perfectly, I really wish I had a will to live and be motivated to do things, problem is I lack self motivation, I only live for my boyfriend and family, majority of days I hope I just die in my sleep…
Been lurking on this site for a while. I have suffered from anxiety and depression since I was about 12. I really struggle to make it through the day because the thoughts are so bad . Probably sounds pathetic but my appearance is the main reason I want to die it’s become really hard for me not to check myself in the mirror frequently am especially self conscious about my hair which to me always looks crap no matter how hard I try , even when I get it done by a professional it still doesn’t look good enough to me. I have been to […]
Have you ever heard of feral children???
Feral children are those who have been adopted and raised by animals, which means even if they are brought back to societythey will always been impaired people why?
“Feral children lack the basic social skills that are normally learned in the process of enculturation. For example, they may be unable to learn to use a toilet, have trouble learning to walk upright after walking on fours all their life, and display a complete lack of interest in the human activity around them. They often seem mentally impaired and have almost insurmountable trouble learning a human language. The impaired ability to […]
I thought about writing a poem examining the similarities of dancing and typing (writing). However, it’s impossible to wring out a dried sponge. Hahahehehoha… Anyone up for scrambled eggs? I’m sure my brain is just as scrambled and just as tasteless. It sucks living in both the past and the present. A world of reality and fantasy every single day… Every goddamn second! Even as I type, the responses are being predicted or would it be lack of? I’m not sure I even care, maybe I’m just trying to prevent myself from banging my head into the wall over and over… My head hurts and […]
I just can’t do this anymore. I’m tired of being the running joke, the punch-line. I’m tired of the battles, of the constant warfare. It shouldn’t be this difficult… it shouldn’t be a competition. Yet there are people in my life that are evil (for lack of a better word). I’m tired of my happiness being destroyed because others feel I don’t deserve it. I’m tired of being tired.
After the holidays I am swan diving. I only hope that seven stories will be enough. I plan to write DNR on my chest just in case.
Hello everyone. I am new to this site. I wanted to share my views on suicide, as I feel very uncomfortable discussing this kind of thing with people I know in real life. I don’t want them to worry about me. I also don’t want them to try preventing anything that might prevent me from doing the ultimate deed. I felt I needed to at least share some of my views with others, so here I am now.
I guess I should tell a bit about myself. I am a 23-year old male nihilist, that is someone who believes there to be no inherent objective value […]
The wind bit and pulled at her skin, tearing through her jacket and into her bones. But she was already cold. No, not from the weather- her soul was cold. And tired. Oh so fucking tired. She felt the chill in her heart and figured wandering about outside would chill her body to match. Dusk had settled on the hills, the light dimming rapidly as the northern wind snapped its icy jaws on her now-red cheeks. As her heart cracked, she stumbled, tears rolling down her face. But she couldn’t feel them. See, she was numb. Inside, and out. The earth was wet, but she […]
I got Fallout 4. I have had it for 4 days now and haven’t played it. I haven’t watched a new movie in … wow I don’t even remember the last movie I watched. Must have been well over a year ago. I have no interest in anything anymore. I did some research and found that it is one of the many symptoms of depression that I definitely have. I will spend an entire weekend doing nothing and then hate myself on monday for wasting it. Anyone else suffering from a complete lack of interest in things you used to be passionate about?
She stands alone in a world that is not always fair. Her soft, blue eyes look out at the world with an innocence akin to that of a child. She is not a child, however, she just isn’t as jaded as myself. “Why can’t you accept me for me? I’m not her, and I never will be. Don’t you see that I’m trying my best to make you proud, and maybe I could succeed if only you would let me.” The constant comparisons, loss of individuality, having to live up to an impossible title. Maybe that is where the compassion comes from. From the place […]
Well… I fucked up my first year of college, so I’m cleaning up the mess. I panicked and stopped going to class. Failed almost all of them due to lack of attendance. BUT. I start CNA classes soon. It’ll only take a couple of weeks, so I won’t have time to flip shit before it’s over and there’s no pressure to be so vastly intelligent. As long as I can take care of these people, I’m good. I know I can. I’ve been helping the CNAs that work in the same building as me for quite some time.
I feel so stupid most of the […]
Alrighty loves, here is today’s positive post challenge. Post something that inspires you, whether it be a piece of art or a name of a loved one or a book, movie, piece of music, etc. I am hoping that with this post, those who lack inspiration and beauty in their lives will find something here. Good luck loves 🙂
Hello everyone…I haven’t posted on here for a while. I sincerely apologize for my lack of absence…I said I would try to help people but I just left. I thought I was better…but I’m not sure anymore. I’ve been always feeling like I’m never good enough. I’m not good enough for school, I’m not good enough for my family, I’m not good enough for the ex girlfriend I still love, I’m not good enough to for anything. I don’t know what to do. It’s handicapping me from doing anything I want to because I’m positive I’ll screw something up as usual. I keep trying to […]
but i dont know how.
cant bring myself to figure it out.
my total lack of motivation knows no bounds.
sit here. sit here. sit here.
i wake up but I never truly wake up.
What at I mean is that my eyes open and my mind is awake to the idea of knowing it’s a new day and I need to get up. But my body is physically drained. My mentality is dead. My heart is tired and my motivation to get through another day is just nowhere to be found.
I am just so exhausted.
I have a job which I love but the motivation to get up is just…. I can’t. I hate it. My feet drag, my eyes water, I’m so tired, always. And it’s not a lack of sleep […]
and it is depressing the hell out of me.
the last few days it has been cloudy, chilly, and raining off and on. i actually really like fall, but i’m light sensitive, and a lack of it can make me more depressed & lethargic. no, i don’t own a light box and i can’t get one unfortunately.
i really want to enjoy this fall, but so far i can’t. i’m just really down. it’s coming up on the one-year anniversary of when my family broke apart, and i’m not taking it well. though it’s better having some distance between now and when it happened, and though that […]
I’m contemplating, stewing, thinking, and I can’t see any exits. I’m poor; well-educated (I have two Bachelor’s degrees in different fields) but not in the right fields, too old to retrain in a new field, and crushed beneath a depression that I can’t get out from under. Soon I’ll be evicted, and my car will be repossessed; I’m in arrears on both, despite working every day. I can’t afford my anti-depressant medication. I can’t afford therapy. I’m divorced, have been for a while, and haven’t been on a date in years (not for lack of trying, but I’m a bit heavy, and I have the […]
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about my friend who – surprise surprise – killed himself. It’s been over 3 years since he left. I was so crushed and felt SO guilty for about a… month. Yeah, it took me only like 30 days to get over the fact that somebody important to me died and that I might have actually pushed that important somebody a little towards the edge. Guess I’m one cold-hearted motherfokker. But despite not really giving a single disco dancing piece of poo about this once-so-tragic-but-not-anymore occurrence, I can safely say that I will never forget this little drama boy.
But hey, […]
I am tired. Have not slept much in days or weeks or months. Seems like i keep reinjuring shoulder/neck injury from last accident where they hit my car. I am just tired of it all, the memory loss, thr cognitive and iq drop, the injuries, constant nightmares and not sleeping. I just want it all to end. I cant get medical, dental, or psych help here, for psych they don,t preform any tests written or physical so i dont know where i stand withe cognitive function loss and iq loss. Dont know whats going on […]
It’s mysterious,
the day you change,
suddenly feelings are engulfed by darkness,
and it feels as if you’re carrying a darker shadow than usual.
You wonder if people notice,
but you don’t think they can,
until you get that one person who says “Why are you so different all the time now?”
and you realize that everyone has noticed,
they’ve just been too polite to say anything.
You curse yourself,
but how could this be your fault?
This isn’t something you wanted,
this isn’t something you can change.
You swallow down the pills,
that numb your brain, feelings,
yourself.
To please you parents, your family, your […]