I just called my insurance company… but I had a strange connection with the operator that answered. He made me feel a million times better. We were laughing and joking for like 10 minutes and he was actually a bit unprofessional and he kept saying how unprofessional he was being. It was cute. It was nice. Is it weird that I almost wanted to tell him to call me? Is it desperate? Have I reached that point where I’m desperate? lol. I’m not going to be modest, it’s not as if I can’t find a man if I want it, but it’s hard to find someone with my […]
Tag:
nice
i try to help other people though their struggles because I have no idea how to help /save myself helping other takes away my pain for short time and is a distraction I like all you guys your strength give me strength when I’m in the darkness fighting the demons
“were in the same game just different levels same hell just different demons ”
would be nice to get to know everyone we all try to support each other though the struggle and you guys have supported me in my dark hours
im not saying we will beat this I’m not saying things will or won’t get better […]
I hadn’t intended to write something funny, but I felt so pathetic I felt ridiculous… and I had to laugh at myself.
Chain of events, but I will try to keep it as short as possible. So my doctor…never mind. Just know that I was so frustrated I started getting dizzy at work and had to hold back tears but that was really okay since I was just about to leave the office, and my friend suggested a psychiatrist. I was so RAARRRR I said it’d probably be the same… and he told me it wouldn’t. So I listened to music on the ~1h drive back […]
I should be happy, right? My birthday is soon and I’ll be 25… Fuck that! I don’t want to live to 50, let alone 25. This urge is getting worse. I want to take a knife, cut open my stomach and rip my damn guts out.
This turtle I’m eating tastes nice… like gluttony.
… so I was sitting on the couch listening ta triple J enjoying a nice coffee, right, and I’m nice and relaxed so I just put my head back and I had a sip of coffee in my mouth and when I went to swallow it I noticed a little bit of trouble like I just had to move my head (and with it my neck) down just a little bit in order to swallow, and it got me trying to drink down this drink with my head held all the way back and I just couldnt do it without the little bit of forward, […]
So it’s holy week and i’m going home to my hometown and leaving the city for awhile. Ive been really difficult lately, ive been acting mad all the time ad im just so full of spite, i dont like it. i dont like being mean. but im just so mad. i failed school, it was supposed to be my last term but i fucked it up (after dropping out from a nice school and being in college for a total of 6 years and now my younger sister has graduated ahed of me and already has a nice job and a nice car) so my […]
I know this for many years but I constantly forget it. When I was 16 I wrote a poem about wearing a perfect mask being perfect on the out side as I died inside.
And I forgot that all I am is a doll for famliy do what they want when they want it. My husband I am toy for I enjoyment that’s all ,my in-laws A robot.
I should be dead the amout of Close calls should have left me dead .
But I realized a long time ago I am worthless shell who has to be dead inside to make everyone happy. Cry myself to sleep […]
so last night thought iv had enough of this shitty life so I swallowed a bunch of pills layed down hopening for a nice send off but
guess what woke up in the hospital pale looking like shit then get home to find out the medic took the rest of the pills so I some how need to get more then and try a different method
After my test tomorrow with the piza place thay interviewed me this week. And I say good bye to my dog, write or type or video recored everything im done. Im fucking done. I cant handle this anymore. Im not going through this again. Im not going to be homeless. Im not goint to be jobless. Im not going to be carless. Im not going to suffer being alone. Im not going through this. I cant take it! I cant fucking take it! I hate myself! I hate everything! I HATE MY LIFE! Im done im fucking done!
IM SORRY SP! IM SORRY EVERYONE! IM SORRY! […]
To play a game or something? I think it would be nice to think of an interactive game to play on the forum. Something to get our minds off of things.
We can do mad libs?
I will start, you will need to fill in these blank spaces first. Then transfer them to my short story. Copy and paste so we can all see what you came up with?
A Name _____
A Time _____
Adjective ______
Noun ______
Name again (the same as the first) _____
Verb ending in ing _____
Verb ending in ing _____
Noun _____
Noun _____
Verb _____
A Place _____
Another place _____
I woke up next to a name, today at a time. I’m thinking […]
As phantom says we got dealt the shit hand by God where did we go wrong or what did we do to piss God off ? is it a test of strength ? Test of faith ? I don’t know but it is some bull shit right here
maybe with lived a high life before this life ? Maybe I should start going back to church ? Or maybe we live in hell and we go heaven when we die ? That dose make suicide sound nice if people who commit suicide and go to heaven it’s a sin I think ? But who cares ? […]
Does love really exist? I’ve wondered this many times. When I’ve dated guys and felt nice around them. When I’m with my grandma. When I think of dad. But then this feeling of emptiness comes along, and i hated it. Is that what love’s supposed to be? Emptiness? Why? Does mom feel like that when she thinks of me -if she ever does-? I hope not. I want her to only see the small good things I’ve done. they’re not so many but they’re something. Right? giving up my freedom wasn’t nothing, Right? God! If I had a dying wish it would be to hear […]
I wonder how suicide project would look if it was a real place like a lil town or room would it be a fun place were we don’t have to wear masks everyday and just be who we are handing out razors to people who self harm walk around with our scars out without question ? A place were we get our medication at noon lol or would it be like we in a mental asylum with no guards ? Or would it be a place were we can find a suicide partner Laugh talk about all our problem for hours then at midnight blow […]
Something dark has brought me back to this place, suicideproject just can’t be erased from my mind even after years. Ive had this ongoing struggle of unhappiness, and I can’t see to win the war.
even now a little older, and have a respectable career happiness hasn’t come. My job as a firefighter has only made me numb to seeing what death really looks like. Pulling half of bodies, limbs and charred remains from houses, mangled bodies from vehicle accidents, spraying off the walls of the people who spattered brains all over
Every once in a while you might save someone and make a difference, but did […]
So I did a bad thing. Today is my boyfriends birthday and I was scrolling through facebook and saw a post from a friend of ours who I think over steps her boundaries with him.
It was a happy birthday post, however it wasn’t good. It basically said “you’re not at uni, you don’t have a job, you don’t have any hobbies and you don’t leave your room. Maybe this is the year you’ll do something. Happy birthday my lover and my friend”
Tell me what part of that post isn’t appropriate! That, in my opinion, isn’t nice. So in a fitof misery and anger, I went […]
I decided last night to sleep on it and I’ve decided, I think today is the day. Thank you all for just being here; it was nice to be able to talk about my feelings somewhere.
I’m afraid but I know what I have to do. I’m only 15 and I know I am missing important things in my potential future but I can’t care anymore. I am most sorry about the scene this will cause and the people I’ll be hurting, but I just don’t want to live anymore and they’ve got to realize it’s for the best.
I hope all of you feel better, you […]
wouldn’t mind drifting off to a nice deep sleep and not waking up the thought is so calming no more stress or to worry about anything anymore just the peaceful silents I do shit in deep thoughts and what happens after we die ? Reincarnation ? Complete nothingness ? Who knows
Hi SP,
It’s been a while since I posted here, but I just wanted to let you know how I’ve been doing.
You may remember a post that I put up in October called ‘About a Girl’?
Well, it turns out that this girl I’ve liked since September likes me back, and it’s one of the best feelings ever.
We’ve been on a date, and we have another one planned for this weekend. So yeah, I’m pretty happy about it.
It’s just nice to know that someone sees me as a nice person, especially when I can’t see it myself, and it’s been really nice […]
UGHH.
I’m so tired.
So drained.
My best friend is moving Friday and the guy I have feelings for might be in jail.
How nice..
I’m only a junior in high school yet so much bullshit surrounds me.
The other day I went for a haircut. I asked for a pixie. I told the stylist I wanted it longer in the back, with lots of layers. She gave me what looks like a boy’s haircut. It’s not feminine at all. I’m so dadgummed miserable with it! I hate it! This is to be my last haircut, as I will soon be making my exit. I had wanted my hair to look nice for that, as weird as it sounds. I was going to color it as well. (It’s mostly grey.) I’ve had many haircuts in my life where the stylist ignored my wishes. […]