I knew my best friend since the 1st grade, I instantlly knew we were going to be best friends. We’ve done everything together up intill middle school, we got put on different teams and we kinda just lost our bond, i tried to make is work but it felt like she didn’t want to be friends anymore so I started hanging out with other people and I asked her why she doesn’t want to be friends anymore and she said because I hang out with other people more than her. Around the begining of the year I started getting depressed and suicidal thoughts and she […]
Tag:
pain
I want to die, now or tomorow I don’t really care when but as soon as possible, please.
I’ve wanted this for so long now… but i just cant bring myself to do it. I’ve planned it out, and it seems so simple and quick, but i just cant do it. I want to die…but at the same time I don’t. I still have things I wanna have the opportunity to accomplish. However some of these things will take a really long time to do, and i just don’t want to wait because meanwhile I’ll just feel sadness and pain… I don’t want those feelings anymore.
What […]
All i see is pain. Do i want to die or just for the pain to stop? Is there a difference? Is there any other way?
I want to share with you a story about my father. I want to share it because my depression is deeply affected by my family relations. The pain and hurts created a Pretend Girl who has been so very sad, so very alone and so very confused. Geee, a build up like that, who could turn away? 😉 I also want to share it because I think we are here in this crazy world to help one another. I want to share my story/stories and if you see part that can help you, I’d be so glad. I am going to write, to publish, to […]
Hi, My name is stefan and I?m 31 years old. I made many mistakes in my
life and caused pain to a lot of people. I?m absolutely sure I will end
up in hell after committing suicide. I realy like to talk to other
people that know for sure they will end up in hell.
I?m blind so most parts of this site are not accessible for me. So
please answer me by email. my email address is: stefan@deds.nl
Best regards, Stefan.
I know the truth I don’t have anyone and never did I just annoy people and ruin things I miss being hugged and talked to anywhere I was I hate hating myself when I die no one should come I’d prefer it I’m unfit for anything I deserve this pain this constant loneliness I can’t let ***** men suffer in silence I’m sorry to my blood line what a disappointment I’ve been my whole lif
I’m so exhausted and lonely. I am so alone. I just want to cut open my wrists. All I do is have pain. Fb’s come and go. No family. I guess god wants me to come home? i don’t know. all i see is a bad future. where i live is such hell. a woman actually posted a “go away” sign on her door. i can hear the new neighbor laughing thru the walls. wish she would shut up, wish i wasnt crying. i dont know how to keep doing this. tried to call a friend, she’s always busy. this is not a life. so […]
I’m a med student.
I’ve recently started cutting – just yesterday in fact – and it hurts. I’d gone and bought carpet blades and tested it, but the feeling when the blade cuts across kinda makes me cringe. But the aftermath – the little pinprick of pain that follows, is amazing. It’s constantly there, and I can FEEL it.
Does it get better? I want to feel that pain, but the starting part just kinda puts me off. It’s he constant pain that makes it so worth it. I’d woken up this morning and added three more cuts, but like I said, the starting part isn’t that pleasant.
I’d […]
I’ve been battling depression for 1 year 3 months and 12 days now. Ridiculous as it sounds I lost my virginity, and it… broke me. To you guys who have casual sex with your girl/boy friend, I carry no judgment on you guys. But my purity was everything to me. And I have destroyed it with 93 hook ups in the past year.
Losing my virginity made me feel hopeless, and I got depressed and suicidal on 3 accounts. I’m happy to say I have been free of depression for a little over 3 months now (woo-woo!). I’m proud of myself for making it this long, but… […]
Hi, My name is stefan and I?m 31 years old. I made many mistakes in my
life and caused pain to a lot of people. I?m absolutely sure I will end
up in hell after committing suicide. I realy like to talk to other
people that know for sure they will end up in hell.
I?m blind so most parts of this site are not accessible for me. So
please answer me by email. my email address is: stefan@deds.nl
Best regards, Stefan.
Hello, my name is Kills and here’s my brief story. I’m currently 24 and have had severe Crohn’s disease for 11 years. Not only that I have a chemical burn on my genitals. I’m in pain many times throughout the day and am not really able to have a sexual relationship. I take medication for Crohn’s but still have a lot of flare ups. As for the chemical burn I have seen many doctors but haven’t received any beneficial medication or alternative remedies. This has extremely effected my quality of life and am very very serious about ending my life. Thanks for reading and have a good night.
Kills.
i write the moon for you
the sad silver part
you thought would never shine
for you
i write the waves for you, soft currents
i know your pain is so immense
the moments they rejected you
let the waves wash healing waters
over all of you
let the moon cast away the darkness
with its silver beauty
forked tongue not of death but licking you clean
let the honey wash and heal you
i know this road is bitter
trust me, my darling
and some day let every word you could never utter
be spoken
like beauty
pearled
I hate business !
I hate money !
I hate capitalism / capitalist !
The main reason is because business kills creativity & ideas . money kills creativity & ideas . capitalism / capitalist kills creativity & ideas !
There are a LOT of good ideas , creativity , imaginations , inspirations , dreams , & even good deeds that business / money kills ! simply because of a petty, shallow reason “it doesn’t make a lot of money or profits ! ”
money makes the world unfair ! business makes the world unfair ! capitalism makes the world unfair !
plus , the world becomes a boring […]
I just want this pain and loneliness to go away. I feel trapped. My depression is getting worse. I want to be gone already but im afraid to kill myself. Everytime I try to attempt suicide I fail. I dont know what to do for all this pain to go away. I hate myself and everything in this world. Why isnt god helping me? I ask for help but my life is actually getting worse.
Hi, My name is stefan and I’m 31 years old. I made many mistakes in my
life and caused pain to a lot of people. I?m absolutely sure I will end
up in hell after committing suicide. I realy like to talk to other
people that know for sure they will end up in hell.
I?m blind so most parts of this site are not accessible for me. So
please answer me by email. my email address is: stefan@deds.nl
Best regards, Stefan.
Hello to you all. I am DarknessIncarnate. This is not my real name but my tale is real I can assure you.
How do I start? I suppose it started when I was in Primary. In my years in my primary school I was never able to make any friends asides from two people. One had the surname of Holmes and the other of Dell. Let’s call them H (for Holmes) and D (for Dell). My first friend was H, and we never really were that far apart from one another. We were close friends and always enjoyed more abstract, imaginative games. Often involving crossing together […]
Hi, My name is stefan and I’m 31 years old. I made many mistakes in my life and caused pain to a lot of people. I’m absolutely sure I will end up in hell after committing suicide. I realy like to talk to other people that know for sure they will end up in hell.
I’m blind so most parts of this site are not accessible for me. So please answer me by email. my email address is: stefan@deds.nl
Best regards, Stefan.
So I got arrested yesterday for heroin possession and trespassing, I have an abscessed tooth causing untold amounts of pain, I’m close to losing my job, and might have to go to prison in 12 days. Suicide has never seemed like a better option.
I am starting to realize how down hill im going. I no longer feel the hope that i use to force myself to feel. Things use to seem beautiful to me, even when they went wrong. Now i feel as though i have no limits. No limits on substances or how much pain i will willing take on to myself. I dont have boundaries anymore. i dont have any typical eating disorder but i had so much built up anxiety i was going days without eating, i was weak and sad but physically didnt want food. I have the same thoughts of the same things […]
It’s been a long time since my last post here. I like to think of that as positive improvement, yet for some reason, during my breakdown today, coming here was the only thing that made the tears stop flowing.
I’ve been feeling a great deal of pressure lately. My sister has been struggling with anxiety and depression for a while now. The past 2 years to my knowledge. This year it got really bad. She stopped going to choral practice and missed a lot of her senior year. She simply stopped doing anything that used to matter to her. So I convinced my parents to send […]