I try to be a really good person. I enjoy doing things for people, especially strangers, to make them feel good. I hugged a random girl crying on the phone the other day. I’ll compliment random people’s outfits, makeup, or hair when I get the chance and overcome my anxiety. I have a friend I met at college named Jess and she is the nicest, sweetest person I think I know. I wonder what made her that way. The fact she helped me out when I needed it most, barely knowing me at the time. She’s pretty much always there for me. She drove me […]
God is boring . boring God .
why human’s imagination & fantasy is better than God boring reality ?
why God is boring ?
I hate this world . I hate this life . I hate life .
This world is so boring , boring world !
This life is so boring , boring life ! life is boring .
Why movies , games , anime / manga, & fantasy / imagination is better than this world / better than life / real life / real world / reality ?
everyday life is the same : wake up, eat, go to school/work, boring, then go back home, […]
I have been severely depressed for several years. I began to think I was bi polar because it would be unbearable for a few months then it would be manageable for a few months then unbearable for a few years etc etc. However apparently with bipolar you get to feel maniacally happy for a small period of the time. Lucky bastards. I broke up with the first person I ever truly loved, due to an occurrence of cheating (on his part) which broke me. Up until this point, I had been getting better. Slowly becoming more active and happier. He managed to destroy my entire […]
So you think you have had a bad life? Well let me give you some insight on what a bad life is…I was conceived by a teenage girl with a teenage boy, of whom she does not know who my father may be. She had planned on having me in her bedroom closet, and then who knows what would have happened to me.
After discovering that my egg donor was pregnant, my grandparents forced her give put me up for adoption.
I cant ant say anything really terrible while I was a child, other than being molested by my “brother”.
I was a rather strong willed child, with […]
I know it shouldn’t matter, but seeing people around me happy, fulfilled, able to handle their finances, their relationships, their lives, it just makes me feel even worse.
I had been feeling better earlier in the year, but seeing other’s succeeding while I continue to fail has sent my back down. I had to delete my Facebook, because it only depressed me.
I have lost everyone that ever mattered to me (save for a few family members and a friend in another state). It is abundantly that others who I thought I was important to don’t care about me or need me at all.
I have long ago […]
Hello SP community!!!! How is everyone doing today?? I hope you all are as well as can be expected……….. I know that those of us that even come to a site like this are not in the best Mental Health and if you are anything like me you really don’t have too many (or maybe none???? I know I fall into such a category…..) good days. But I can wish it for you and perhaps something can come along and make the day a little more tolerable and a light of hope-if nothing but a spark-can help you make it through one more day. So, […]
Recently I decided to take matters into my own hands and end my life. I’ve set the date (New Years Eve) the time and the place. I have even decided who I want to be present. The thing is, I am not actually that suicidal. I just understand that I have no further use on this planet. More people need to come to this realization. I have been kicked out of school and have a pretty crappy future because of a lack of new options for my life. I’m far too intelligent to work at McDonald’s or Wendy’s forever and quite frankly it is beneath […]
Someone right now is leaving their apartment
Looking down at the street, wondering where there car went
Someone in the car sitting at a signal
In front of a restaraunt, staring through the window
at someone right now with their finger in their teeth
Who could use a little floss right across the street
there’s somebody on the curb who really needs a jacket
spent half the rent at a bar getting plastered
Now he gotta walk fourteen blocks
to work at a shop where he’s about to get fired.
Someone right now is looking pretty tired
Staring at a laptop trying to get inspired
Somebody living right across the street
She wrote the best things she’s written […]
Sigh.where do I begin…I need help from someone to tell me what is so wrong with me?? Every time the clock hits 6 pm I start to feel very depressed and I don’t know why…no matter how hard I try it will always be there sharp at 6 pm…right I feel very useless 🙁
Waking up from a failed suicide attempt is one of the worst feelings I have experienced in my life. Twice. Why can’t I just die? I would gladly give my life to save someone else if I could.
I want so many things in life. I want to be the one that makes a difference. I want to be the person that will be there for you no matter what. I want to be someone useful. I want to be liked and accepted. I mean, who doesn’t? I want to fit in. I want to be happy.
I want a normal life with a normal family. I wish I had someone I could call mom. Have someone to call dad. I never had a dad growing up so it makes me want one even more. I see girls with their dads and those are […]
I keep bouncing back and forth on what to think of you. I want to see you for the person you really are. How you avoided me and just walked away when you saw me, how you didn’t come in to pick me up from the police station, how when I pushed you away physically when we were having sex and obviously was uncomfortable, but you kept going, and finally rolled over annoyed, sleeping at opposite ends of the bed, how you probably had sex with other girls while you were doing “business” and crawled back into my bed every single night. The thought of […]
“We’re all just floating around, waiting for someone to walk on water.”
I’m pushing 40 and have never gotten to just hold someone, or had a real romantic relationship. I’m too ugly and disfigured for anyone to get close to. I’ve f–cking had it.
I am not fit for this world. my whole life I have been ‘that weird kid’ with maybe one friend at a time. I was never properly integrated into the chaotic social structure inside which resides any and all hope of being happy, and it is because of this that I am approaching the end…
I have been thinking about suicide for as far back as I can remember, but it was only recently that I got serious and began my new hobby of noose-tying. I know a lot of people on here say they are ‘horrible people’ and all that, but for me I think […]
Been browsing for a few days now and finally feel like posting. This is the first time in my life I am seriously considering actually going through with suicide… I am not quite ready for talking openly on here but it would be nice to talk with someone who also uses the site to kinda “show me the ropes, (nooses?). anyways.. I am on omegle right now and if you want to come find me, put ‘suicideproject.org’ as an interest/keyword and lets see if you can see me!
p.s. I hope this is ok to do and if not just let me know. Not trying to […]
Above are a few of my older shots repurposed or recycled to make one piece.. Is that what I am? Am I just something that someone forgot about? It’s like whatever put me here found me and decided that I could be used to take everyone’s shit. Have I been repurposed? I used to be proud of who I was.. Not so much now..
A flower destroyed for its fragrance
A singer being forced to dance
A branch broken to cause pain
Water released to go down the drain
All of […]
In conversation, I constantly have to guess what emotion I’m supposed to feel, then try to act it out as best I can. I’m very afraid of being discovered in my callousness and indifference. When something bad happens, it’s scary to think that someone might find out how little I feel for others in their misfortune. Joy, of course, is completely absent.
When others are feeling emotion it seems like a curious and alien thing to me now. It’s like watching someone perform a physical feat of strength that I’ll never be able to do. I used to feel emotion in a normal way, but I […]
The first time i was raped i was seven. i didn’t grow up with a father figure around, and i guess wasn’t shown love so i honestly thought that this was how somepne showed you they love you. I’ve been raped three times sinse then. By ‘friends’ that i obviously trusted to much, by my uncke.. all my life I’ve been classified by numbers whether it be how much my hospital bill was, what grades I’m getting or how much i weigh. a few weeks ago i was shown that I’m worth $50 cause that’s how much someone paid to rape me. I’m so […]
I don’t understand myself or anyone or anything. I want someone to talk to that understands. But I don’t feel that anyone else understands me or anyone or anything either. Maybe I feel this way because I don’t understand. I’m confused