How much suicidal are you?
Rate 10% to 100%
(10% for least and 100% most)
How many times have I heard that a suicidal person is selfish if he/she kills him/her self? That makes me so angry, because I know the pain, the years of unending pain, that leads one to attempt suicide. When I hear things like “you’ve hurt so many people who care about you,” I want to scream “what about a pain that drives me to want to die.” Doesn’t that mean anything!
Does anyone else on this site relate? I’d like to read your input.
depression anxiety suicidal insomnia paranoia self harm BPD Adha are done
🙂 how is everyone
Well, It’s been a long 26 years that I’ve been alive… I have accomplished nothing of value. I do not contribute to the betterment of society. I am selfish and I know it. I lie and manipulate the people I care about most. I’ve lost every love I’ve ever had due to my mental illnesses.. I’ve been trying to get better, I really have, but it’s just too much. I go to group 3 days a week, then I have my ACT team 4 days a week, my psychiatrist every 2 weeks, one on one therapy once a week. My body is filled with prescription […]
I came across something really neat. You should think about it as well.
“Suicide is not chosen; it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain.”
“Well, you’re still reading, and that’s very good. I’d like to ask you to stay with me for the rest of this page. I hope it means that you’re at least a tiny bit unsure, somewhere deep inside, about whether or not you really will end your life. Often people feel that, even in the deepest darkness of despair. Being unsure about dying is okay and normal. The fact that you are still alive at this minute means you are […]
What happened to suicide?
What happened to everyone?
It’s like I’m in Jr. High.
Where did the heart go?
Diversity?
This place isn’t home.
My family gone.
I’m tired of watching as everyone focuses on juvenile topics.
When there are people like me, and others that need more attention than others.
Yet everyone doesn’t care.
They say they do.
If they really did, then I don’t see it I haven’t for several weeks.
See, people like me are left in the shadows as everyone parties.
When that one heart felt, blunt comments could save one of us from falling off the edge.
You say you miss someone when they trun up missing, but do you really?
If they come back […]
Is it a good part? Should it be listened to? It’s very unrealistic and naive but it’s hopeful. Last I checked hope was a good thing.
The other part is a realist and knows that history is a good predictor of the past. Being on a downward spiral points further down.
in short, I’m suicidal with a fantasy of breaking free and becoming something great
Do I have to spend my life trying to try? Trying to fix things? No. Wrong question. But yes, being alive is being hopeful. Hopeful? Even though life eats you up all the way from the inside before it even begins to show on the outside. I’m talking about the scars you have from letting blood, because that makes sense; you cut yourself and blood escapes the crease that separates what binds the skin together.
Nor the bags under your eyes caused from endless sleepless nights or disturbed sleep caused by misread and confounding dreams that make you want to avoid sleep, one of the only […]
If a miracle happens before a years span and I’m magically stable and no longer suicidal. I plan on adopting him.
I feel like I’ve exhausted the people I can talk to. I’m just boring people with my suicidal state now and I’m scared of driving people away.
I talk to friends. I rant on social media. I feel like I’m just wasting time talking to volunteers of hotlines. I post here. None of it makes me feel better or is cathartic in any way. It’s just something to do because my brain won’t let me do anything else.
Fuck me.
I live for sweets. It’s one joy in my life out of few. I don’t care if it’s bad for my teeth. I’d rather endulge in sweets throughout my life. I’m eating frozen moose tracks yogurt. My breath already smells funny. The yogurt is old, I’m not sure how old, but it has a little freezer burn. But I don’t care.
It’s cold tonight. It’s storming, raining and hailing. I eat ice cream and sich when it’s cold or nights like this. Isn’t that weird I hate ice cream in the summer. It melts so fast.
Besides this, I’m waiting to hear from a friend. He is […]
I’m so alone, and it’s one of the most painful things to know that I will probably always be alone. It just hurts.
23 hours left. (I’m sorry I’m going to post so much.)
Suicide Project. The name in it’s own.
Have you ever thought about is? Suicide project. That name. It’s cleaver. I would like to believe that it is that for a reason. For a purpose.
We the people of Suicide Project are almost like lab rats. Being watched. Just a group of people struggling with what is simpily death. I imagine someone is observing us. Seeing how we react to each other. How we help each other. What it’s like to be suicidal. Or you can look at it this way.
We are an ongoing project. As long […]
It’s been years since I was suicidal- and when I mean suicidal- I will do it, not just think about it. I’ve always been sad or depressed, and have always thought of death. But this is different. When you come to a point when you’re completely broken, you’ve lost everything, when you can’t even take a good breath of air bc your lungs and your body is so fucked up. When you’ve got nothing but a future of struggles and pain and torment waiting for you. When you’ve got NO ONE in your life- except for some nameless faceless people […]
I feel like I do everything wrong. I don’t even understand why I exist.
I have choice but to be suicidal. The razor blades are my only friends.
Fuck this, fuck life, fuck existence, fuck everything.
Bye.
I’m astounded I never heard of suicide project before, seeing as I’ve fantasized about, planned and studied suicide for many many years. Whenever I dare to get close enough with someone that I might actually feel happy, they sense my deep depression and ask the inevitable – are you suicidal? That doesn’t satisfy them, no. They have to go further. How often do you think of suicide? That’s when they flee.
The bonds I need in order to cease feeling suicidal are not available to me until I’m no longer suicidal.
And around and around we go.
I’ve been suicidal for almost 21 years, since I was 20. I’m not feeling anything right now. I am hopeless. I live in a vacuum. I think about suicide because there’s no other solution that I can believe in, not that I believe in suicide either. I’ve posted before about my history, but I’m not sure what from it could have kept me from being where I am now.
hey everyone. I’m new here but I have been trying to commit suicide for the past few years. I can’t remember the last time I was not suicidal. I’ve had a lot of traumatizing hardships in my life but I do not want to type it out because it would be too time consuming and exhausting.
I don’t think I have it in me to go over the details as to why I really want to and need to end my life. I wanted to go by the route of cyanide poisoning but I’ve been researching a lot on how to obtain it, and it seems […]
Whatever it is. ….. I can’t …..
I feel like… I’m not depressed enough. Does that make any sense? Like, I’m not suicidal enough to be here. I don’t fit in.
I’m not numb. I feel. I feel a lot. I can’t describe it though. Sad, yes but not that sad. Angry, a little. I guess, well… I feel like a radio stuck between 2 stations. 2 different songs alternating, making no sense and a shit load of static.
The fuck is emotional static?
Don’t you ever feel numb all over, for no apparent reason? Welcome to the feeling of depression..
I honestly don’t know what to start with, so let me just say this:
Most of myself (my dark, depressing and suicidal self) actually wants me to kill myself, but I don’t think I have the guts to even do it. But I always think about what will happen, and how I wouldn’t have to suffer anymore.
But the (I hate using this word) normal side of me thinks about who it would hurt, and then I’d feel guilty and would want to seek help. But most of […]