I have decided that its my time to take a break. I’m taking a break from just everything. If you thought I was reckless before then now is the time to let go. I’m done with it all. IÂ will try suicide again. I will do whatever the hell I want because I’m dying anyway…so what the hell does it matter anymore? All the friends that I have (which is few to none) don’t even know. My life is so useless…I deserve all that came towards me in the past couple years. I deserve the pain. But now I can’t fight it anymore so I’m giving […]
Tag:
Suicide
i should be happy. i’ve got a great girlfriend, i’ve got a few good friends, i’ve got my cat..
i’m not alone, so why do i feel this way?
no matter how many times someone will tell me i’m worth it or that suicide is never an option, i can’t help but think, fuck you. seriously though, fuck you, to everybody who thinks they understand, to everybody who won’t listen when i tell them they don’t understand. i feel so alone because nobody really knows me, only i can know myself, who of which i can’t even fully comprehend. so yea, people can tell me i’m worth […]
Why??!! Why??!! Why does everybody always say that I’m happy, and I’m funny and laughing and stuff?! Do they really don’t see that HUGE mask I wear most of the time??? It’s just so crazy. Today too, I was at the part-time therapy (monday till friday from 9am till 3pm) and the group and the therapists thought that I was happy and that everything was okay, and so on. And that while they know I wear often a mask and that it goes really bad with me right now. But how hard I tried, they wouldn’t believe me I’m feeling really bad and that all […]
By:EmoCookie
Oh suicide
I cant stop thinking about it at the moment
I want to cry but hold it in
I want to cut but  something is stopping me
Something tells me that
That it wont stop me for that long
I couldnt hold it in now I am crying
The other night
I couldnt stop thinking suicide
suicide
SUICIDE
so many ways my mind came up with
grrr
i dont know what to do anymore
what to say
what to feel
I love this boy!!! so so so much!!! hes the most amazing person ive ever known. I love everything about him I love how dominant he is lol. im his new plaything (his words not mine) I love how hes my prince and I know he can and will protect me. we are just alike in a lot of ways but hes way more bold than I am lol and I have better reasoning then him we fit perfect and I know it I just wish he didn’t move and we’ve ben fighting a lot lately… :'( im so afraid to lose my best friend […]
All I have ever wanted is to be stunningly beautiful. Like Rita Hayworth or Marilyn Monroe. I know that’s terribly shallow, but honestly, I don’t really care. The only reason I have yet to attempt suicide for a third time in two months is because I want to wait until I achieve this goal. And then, I will try again. Because then, at least in my pathetic life I will have achieved something.
Let me just begin by saying that i have contemplated suicide many times in my life time, mostly during my adolescence, but just recently also. I have been observing this page for a few days, and have been reading all of your posts.
I happened to stumble upon this article while searching near death experiences, and was amazed and humbled by the words so much that i began to cry. (not from sadness, but from the pure warmth of peace) I hope this brings you peace, and if not peace, a better understanding on why you are here now, and why we all MUST suffer sometimes… […]
Its another morning.
I awake. I sob. I’m awake. I’m still alive. I wish I wasn’t.
I suffer from dysthymia, a form of mild depression that is persistent. All I know is down, all I have ever known is down. I also suffer from Major Depression, episodes of extremely severe depression that last 1-12 months at a time. Yes, they put depression in my depression so I can be depressed while I’m depressed. This is called double depression. One of its features is being more hopeless than someone with one form or the other, another is that it is hard to treat.
I also have generalized anxiety. Tons of anxiety all […]
My Name is Markus Jolley, also I go by MJ. I have tried at least 12 attempts of suicide, all failing, and now all I have is myself. I have no family, and I live in a group home for troubled or stranded youth. When I did have a family, I developed differently than any other kid my age. The Tests for mental instability or disorders started when I was 5. I went through medical tests over and over, until an MRI was ordered on my brain. It turned out that I had Frontal Lobe Gliosis which looks like this. http://www.ajnr.org/content/24/2/218/F3.large.jpg
This Problem explained my functioning […]
I suppose I should begin by saying that I’m not seriously considering suicide, and even if I were I don’t think I could go through with it. That being said, this seems like an appropriate place to share in a way that I’ve never even attempted to in real life.
Upon first talking to me, people generally assume that things go well for me and that I’m on some sort of path to success. I’m intelligent, educated, have a good sense of humor and have always had strong natural talent in music, which has been the focus of the last 8 years or so of my […]
My name is Elora Schrader. I am thirteen years old, and I was hospitalized last March for an overdose of prescription drugs. My parents are druggies and drunks, and I beg for them to notice me, but nobody listens and nobody hears me cry. Because, in the here and now, nobody cares about anyone but themselves.
I have deconstructed a pencil sharpener, removing the blade. it is 10:35 PM. I will not do anything until 11:00. I hope that I will see or hear, something, anything to change my mind. I don’t WANT to do this again, but it is the only solution. Not just to […]
I’m a 14 year old guy.
These are some of the reasons I think I should commit suicide.
I was at a good friend’s house. He walked down the hall. I thought to use the restroom. He came back with a shotgun. He told me what a worthless son of a ***** I was and that he was going to kill me. He pressed the gun against the side of my head. Then pulled it back and looking frustrated with himself for not following through, punched me. I layed there while he yelled at me and told me why he hated me until my parents got there […]
My head is a mess. I’m only 19. I’m a girl but I want to be a boy, no one knows that. My mom only stays with us one month per year ’cause she has to work in another country, my dad has mental problems, I live with him, yay. I only have one friend but we don’t share everything.
I was supposed to live. I was supposed to give something to this world. But no, I’m here, preparing my suicide. No note left, just my Tumblr account can clarify some things about the real me. I have no talent, no social skills, no motivations, just […]
Been a little while. Hi everyone. Whenever I think about suicide (which has been happening more and more frequently) I always try to figure out why I want to die. The main thing I’ve decided that drives towards suicide is an increasing lack of interest in everything. It all sounds so dull and tedious. There are times when I just want to be alone and sleep, times when being dead and people leaving me alone sounds very enticing. That’s actually one of the more frequent desires I find myself having during my moments. I suppose the other thing I find interesting about death is rather […]
if i leave him will anyone hold me? will i feel love? will i break? will he cheat on me? does he still love me? if i die would there be never ending black and would anyone care? more importantly would he feel guilty? would he feel guilty that he raped me and called me those things or would he be angry and think it was the result of my dad, or any other abuse? why am i still here, why am i with him? if i die heaven will take me anyway despite my sins, maybe hell will consume me and torture […]
sometimes id love to just bang my head against the kitchen table till i bleed to death.You see im caught between this road of all for killing myself yet slightly afraid.Not Afraid of whatll happen to me but to everyone else.My families is bad but not that bad. Im afraid by living im making my life worse and that by dying ill make there lives worse. I told my mom recently after my admission to the hospital that i felt everyone that theyd be better off if i was dead. But my mom told me how everyone acted when i was away at the hospital […]
From the age of around 2-4 years old i was abused for the first time, my old babysitters son grinded against me when he was hard and i tried to get away from him but being a child he was much stronger and would not allow it. When i went to kindergarten another boy would try to touch me and i pleaded with him to stop but it didn’t end till the year was over and he had violated other girls as well. When i was five years old i begged GOD to kill me everyday. It got to the point where i wrapped a bad […]
If I was to cut myself up and die that would be suicide… Yes.. Hanging.. Yes.. Suffocating myself.. Yes.. But what if I stopped taking my asthma and blood pressure meds?.. Would that be a careless accident or would I be tarnished with the suicide brush?..
I’m currently stuck in hospital, not sure when ill be released but they’ve kept me in here for 3 months before. I can’t wait any longer to do this so I’m just going to do it in here. problem is I’m a wimp with pain so want to do it as painlessly as possible. Not to mention the lack of things I could use to CTB with. my plan is to use the exit bag with valium (diazapam).
My question is, how much diazapam do I need? I don’t want to puke just lose consciousness. I’m going to start hoarding it and think I can […]
IM A FUCKIN FAILURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK