Tag:

trying

Something I had to work on offline.

by thelost 11/29/2015

written by thelost

There they are, all of the muses I’ve taken recently. God, what I’d give to not see this. What I’d give to forget them all and move on with life.
Little_Old_Me with her auburn hair, beautiful face, and lips I’d kill to kiss again. Sammi6xoxo, her tall, slender, frame with those eyes I write about so often.

Little_Old_Me.
She’s sitting on the curb. Right now she’s not wearing very heavy clothes, it’s still a warm Iowa summer and there’s no need. The long, auburn, hair I’ve grown to so admire is tied up right now. Beauty embodied. The slight curvature of her jaw, not too sharp, which […]

11/29/2015 0 comment

What are we living for?

by heartless 11/28/2015

written by heartless

Hollow smiles and empty days

Fading light and lonely nights

A struggle to find what’s been lost

A fight that never ends

Watching time slip away

I’m just trying for one reason right now, but I already fucked everything up in my life. Symptoms are getting worse, and the worst time of the year is coming up again. Fun.

Stupid idiot

11/28/2015 0 comment

Dancing Down

by Zetsumei 11/28/2015

written by Zetsumei

I thought about writing a poem examining the similarities of dancing and typing (writing). However, it’s impossible to wring out a dried sponge. Hahahehehoha… Anyone up for scrambled eggs? I’m sure my brain is just as scrambled and just as tasteless. It sucks living in both the past and the present. A world of reality and fantasy every single day… Every goddamn second! Even as I type, the responses are being predicted or would it be lack of? I’m not sure I even care, maybe I’m just trying to prevent myself from banging my head into the wall over and over… My head hurts and […]

11/28/2015 8 comments

Nights are the hardest

by abisslover25 11/28/2015

written by abisslover25

I hate nights. They are the absolute hardest. Everything is quiet, I have no family or friends. I go through my phone trying to find someone to talk to and no one responds. I scroll through my Facebook that I haven’t posted on in weeks and it’s all holiday pictures of families. It’s human nature to want someone to share your life with and I hate it. So I sit in silence in my room and read articles. :(. It’s such a lonely life at the end of the day.

11/28/2015 9 comments

Mum, Dad

by alonelybird 11/28/2015

written by alonelybird

You make me feel so shit. You try to help me but you hurt me. You guys make me feel so depressed. You’ve killed my social life, my only respite from home, my only coping mechanism that seems to work without being overly self-destructive. How can I cope now?

No dad I cannot fucking talk to you, can’t you see?
Every time we talk I stutter. Can’t you see? I’ve never been comfortable around you guys, that’s why I’m always trying to escape. That’s why I do the things I do. It’s all to escape from you guys (mainly) and school.

You guys make me wanna kill […]

11/28/2015 6 comments

I Feel Nothing!!

by Ylem 11/26/2015

written by Ylem

I have been trying for years to look deep inside myself in search of some kind of humanly feelings. All I have find is hollow and empty nothingness. There is a deep hollow void in my heart that cant be filled by anything.
Yes, I smile I laugh, but those are all just fake. I have perfected it over the years. Fake emotions.
There is also some darkness lurking inside of me. I have kept that dark flame in me at bay for quite some time, but now, I feel like Im losing that battle. Im getting darker and darker by the day.
It scares […]

11/26/2015 8 comments

Trying to hang on……

by dumpling3236 11/26/2015

written by dumpling3236

I already know I will end my life. However, I am trying to hang on until after my youngest is 18 (in several months). It is getting very difficult to wait. I have everything planned and ready to go.

Each day is harder than the last. My very existence is torturous. I have no one to help me. The doctor trys to help but no medication or therapy has made a difference (over the last 40 years).

Every interaction seems to just take another piece of me. I have no more to give. The tank is finally empty.

I am afraid I won’t be able to survive to […]

11/26/2015 7 comments

Awkward

by thehusk 11/25/2015

written by thehusk

It’s starting to dawn on me that I’m not really capable of the whole ‘human interaction’ thing. Even online.

I just can’t seem to ever talk naturally, without being incredibly self-conscious. Everything I say feels fake and contrived, even when I’m trying to be genuine. It’s like I’m not really human – just some kind of defective robot trying to copy behavior but getting it wrong.

I just need to stop being me. Stop thinking these defective thoughts. Be normal. Do normal things. Not constantly question everything. Stupid brain. Thinking dumb thoughts. You go shhh now.

The problem is me. Everything about the way I think. But how […]

11/25/2015 6 comments

Protected: Lurking Indominable Maggot

by whiskered-fish 11/25/2015

written by whiskered-fish

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

11/25/2015 11 comments

Coming Out

by thegirlwiththecinderblockgarden 11/23/2015

written by thegirlwiththecinderblockgarden

My mother just tried to force me to come out. And now I feel like shit.
I was talking to her about the possibility of me running the LGBTQ+ society at my college next year and she jumped down my throat, saying that I thought she was a terrible person, and that’s why I wouldn’t tell her. She says that I’m breaking the bond between us by keeping this from her and I’m deeply upsetting her by not talking about it.
You know what the most important part in all of that was?
HER
She didn’t care about what it was doing to me, being […]

11/23/2015 7 comments

I want to die

by nicole123 11/22/2015

written by nicole123

OI keep trying to tell my self that I don’t feel this way but I do. I want to lull myself so badly . But I’m scared . I don’t like my life at all . Everything is so messed up. I wish to be asleep forever. I’m so depressed. I don’t like anything . I feel like nothing . I want to go .

11/22/2015 7 comments

She fought, but could to survive.

by NZsocietystory 11/20/2015

written by NZsocietystory

22nd April 2015. I remember is like it was yesterday but it feels so long ago. I was talking to a friend in the morning about you, asking if she had heard from you, telling her I was worried about you but at the same time was so proud of you for continuing to pull through. I was sitting in a managers fire meeting, Level 6, we had just been made chief fire wardens (a job that we did not want) and my phone light pinged […]

11/20/2015 6 comments

In trying

by abisslover25 11/20/2015

written by abisslover25

I am really trying here. I’m trying to do things that make me happy. I am trying to figure out ways to make things work. My kids are going away for the weekend. I will be alone and I know what that is going to do to me. I will want to end it. I will be completely alone with no one to talk to. No one will txt or call. I tried to make plans but all fell through. The quiet suffocates me. I can already feel the pain. I know if I don’t figure something out I will try to end it and […]

11/20/2015 3 comments

I hate myself

by Link63981 11/19/2015

written by Link63981

Let me start out with a list of things that’s wrong with me

I’m fat I’m stupid (failing 3 classes in school) I mess up people’s day get called names by my parents and I mess up things in general.

I’ve been diagnosed with depression

I want to die and I deserve to anyway

I’m a burden to my 3 friends and family because of these reasons and others.

When someone’s having a good time or having fun ill say something and then ruin there time

I swear my parents hate me they’ve call me lazy ignorant a whiny little ***** they’ve told me to screw of cause I was trying […]

11/19/2015 2 comments

another rant

by tteia 11/19/2015

written by tteia

im so fucking tired of life. i really am. i just feel like the days are getting worse, and worse. And nothings gonna change. This past week I’ve found myself thinking about running away, or filling up my bath tub, and falling asleep in it. Or hanging myself in the bathroom, and im basically just trying to say, im really tired of life. im tired of me, an i really wish it could get better, but I no its not going to be..so I just want to end it. I just want it to end. I’m tired of going to school, and always feeling […]

11/19/2015 1 comment

Here’s a rant. Herp Derp Derp

by maddie_kay 11/19/2015

written by maddie_kay

I need to get the hell out of here.
Friend #1 called the cops on me and told them some lie about me wanting to do some murder-suicide shit to my boyfriend. I got mad at her, and she told everyone around me that lie. Because how dare I get upset, how dare I swear at her for calling the cops out of nowhere and in the middle of the night.
Now my neighbors think i’m a danger to their children and call them inside everytime I leave my house.

Then there’s Friend #2. He walks up to me at work, accompanied by his buddy, and […]

11/19/2015 2 comments

movie night is hard to get started

by hiitsme0819 11/19/2015

written by hiitsme0819

i have to be in the rabb.it room please hmu on skype or something b4 trying to enter so i can get in there and let people in i would love to watch movies with people i just dont want to have to sit in the room and keep my finger crossed that someone joins me it does notify me in my email when someone tries to enter but by the time i check it its too late because i done missed whoever tried to get in whenever i get those notifications i do click the allow them in button but i always seem to […]

11/19/2015 2 comments

Dreams better than reality? Why Dream is better than reality? Why is Dreams better than reality?

by niki 11/19/2015

written by niki

Why Dreams is better than reality?
Why is Dream better than reality?
Why is dreams better than reality? Why dream is better than reality?

What puzzles me the most is human’s mind / human’s brains and imagination better than reality / human’s fantasy is better than reality.

for example:
just look at the movies, novels, comics, games, books, , animations (anime / manga), science fiction (sci-fi / sci fi), fantasy , like Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Narnia, Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, Swords Art Online, MMORPG , Interstellar , The Matrix , Avengers , X-Men , etc etc, they are much more interesting, full […]

11/19/2015 1 comment

Alone for the hoildays. :(

by BrokenAngel8 11/17/2015

written by BrokenAngel8

Well its less than 2 weeks away till thanksgiving the beginning of the holiday season and I am single for the first time in two years, feeling depressed from the overwhelming load of classwork and haunting thoughts from this time last year. I just feel so alone . To the point that I honestly think its pathetic. I mean I know I’m extremley pretty, nice, loyal, funny , hardworking and yet I am still here alone. I mean its bad enough that I sleep with the tv on just so I have a little bit of company at night. I am trying hard to stay […]

11/17/2015 6 comments

I want to die

by rainyday 11/17/2015

written by rainyday

I move from time to time from different feelings and emotions. Today I am having another bad day.

I cannot kill myself because I made a promise that I will no hurt me. Because if I do it I will condemn the people I love to pain. Because there is not a method that is not painful. Because trying could bring more pain and no even the death.

I do not want to continue living, life does not make to much sense for me. There are really no difference. Because no matter what this pain will never go away. I do not know how to explain the […]

11/17/2015 9 comments

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