Not my first time here. I’ve created an account on here before, just forgot the username, pw, and email. :/ I doubt anyone care about that, cux I was barely active on here. I only submitted one post, and that was it. It was around this time when I’ve these thoughts.
What’s up with my life? Like majority of you on here, I’m just unsure anymore. Lot’s been going on. Mom’s diabete, hypertension, and kidney stone. Sister has hypertension. Dad has hypertension. Two brothers have hypertension, and possibly diabete as well. And here I am, well, fine. What the FUCK!!
I’m currently in college, majoring in pre-nursing. I want to help them, but what more can I do with the limited knowledge I have?
Classes I’m currently in are fucking demanding. And I’m trying every possible way to stay positive. Think of happy thoughts, the happy future, and continue my way through, only to be led down by the hope I build inside. Last year, I was able to get over this suicidal contemplation becuase school was the only problem I had at the time. Now that it’s school, family’s health, and my own problem…I just can’t handle it anymore. I can’t see a future ahead of me anymore. I can’t picture myself living a well life without these suicidal thoughts reeling back into my head. Something’s telling me that sooner or later, I will lose one of my loved ones. And I know that when the day come, I won’t be able to tolerate it.
Might as well just end mine before I see one of them leave.
I just wish that when I go to sleep tonight, a miracle will find its way into my sleep, and never let me open my eyes again. I’m tired. I’m overwhelmed with everything. I just want escapes.
2 comments
I understand. I just don’t know what to tell you at this precise moment…
Hey,
Firstly, we are born to live and journey, and when it is our time, we pass. Both birth and death are normal, they are two sides of the same coin; life.
I say dont fear death, and so too don’t fear life. Enjoy the positive experiences, problem solve what you can with your skill set and live life too. All will die, but few will truly live.
School problems, Family problems, Personal problems ~ yep sometimes they can become overwhelming. The real question is what’s behind these problems; the cause; the catalysts?
As a nurse, you will have some good insight into physical ailments, but just remember mental health is important too. Keep it balanced vs one sided.
Overly optimistic or overly negative is never good. Aim for a balanced, considered approach to problems. Fix what you can. Give comfort in other situations.
I hope things get better.
Stay well.