Rants

2

when will this end

June 24th, 2017by nonexistingsoul

the longer I live
the worse I get

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2

What Next?

June 23rd, 2017by Lutefisk

I just don’t know what to do with myself now. I’ve pretty much completed the biggest part of my bucket list (somewhere I traveled) and now I can’t seem to motivate myself at all. I know what I would want to do in the future, but now it feels like whether I make it to that point or not doesn’t matter at all. I have a wonderful life filled with supportive and kind people who tell me daily how much potential I have, but I have nothing to show for it. Guilt and a vague but almost desperate feeling of “there’s surely something left for you …

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2

To Stay…

June 21st, 2017by Mehikka

I wish I could stay here…

However, talking to you all and reading

All of your stories…

Makes it harder for

Me

To Stay

I’m always going to be falling

Apart.

And yet, I post this and you people try

To make me stay…

Yet that decisions isn’t yours to make…

I try to make wishes to stay

I have so much going on I have a feeling that

I won’t make

It to the end of summer,

Unlike what my friends

Want me to

Do…

Even though

We do nothing together

They make it harder for me to stay…

Alive…and well and a whole bunch of random crap…

My life is

A

Bunch

Of

Random

Crap…

Nothing to see here…

I’m done…

Just

Plain

Done…

Sorry Farah

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2

Note to self:

June 18th, 2017by PrismaticGreyZone

You must first fail to succeed, everything in life.

Like your first step as a baby, you try but fall so many times over, but eventually you learn to walk, and then run. That was your first challenge in life. If you decided to quit then, you wouldn’t have learned to walk at all. Sometimes we forget the very first lesson we learn in life: Baby steps.

With every stage in life, it presents different levels of challenges; fighting to survive your unfortunate circumstances or fighting to defend and accept yourself or fighting your dissatisfaction. These challenges help shape the person you had become and will become, …

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9

How do you guys cope?

June 18th, 2017by Black Holez

So how do you do it? First off, some background. I’ve come to the realization that everything that has transpired in my life for the last 4 years has led me to being down, depressed and unable to socialize and do ordinary day-to-day tasks. I just sulk around the house unable to do anything, thinking about things like how worthless I am, how abandoned and rejected I truly feel. If I do go out and try something new, I’m unable to function and do ordinary tasks, making people view me as some kind of failure or a retard because I make a mistake. It doesn’t …

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2

June 18th, 2017by Milestiba

I don’t matter here

I don’t matter there

I don’t matter anywhere

Hope I never wake up again

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0

i am sorry….

June 17th, 2017by Butterfly904

I’m sorry to all of my friends for lying to you and telling you many things I should have. For pushing you out of my life and telling you nothing is wrong and I am fine. I know they will NEVER be on this site, but I really truly am sorry. But not for this one friend. I  not sorry for being shit to her. She never cared about me and when I would actually tell her something that has been on my mind for two fucking weeks she would just brush it off like it is nothing. IT IS SOMETHING THAT HAS CONCERNED ME …

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2

How do you people go through with this?

June 16th, 2017by Black Holez

I’ve come to the realization that everything that has transpired in my life for the last 4 years has led me to being down, depressed and unable to socialize and do ordinary day-to-day tasks. I just sulk around the house unable to do anything, thinking about things like how worthless I am, how abandoned and rejected I truly feel. If I do go out and try something new, I’m unable to function and do ordinary tasks, making people view me as some kind of failure or a retard because I make a mistake. It doesn’t help that they view me as some kind of mentally …

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0

Legalities

June 14th, 2017by nokshus

As if it wasn’t already a ***** enough. Fuck sakes you deal with the trivialities daily. The unending grind and minutiae. The milieu of reckless absolvency. Fuck, you go from the boredom to the banality. It’s all stupid shit.

Introduce the legal system or any of the bullshit bureaucracy into the fuckshow that is life and it becomes a whole new ball game. Fuck the legalities and hoops it makes you jump through. For real. Fuck incarceration.

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3

Is this life?

June 14th, 2017by Grass

Sometimes I want so badly just to do something. To create. Instead of that, I do nothing. I sit here in my lonely hole, and try my hardest to empty my head and hands of everything that troubles my soul. My words don’t even come out right anymore. As the years pass, I grow more reclusive and distant from myself. It’s as if I’ve almost disappeared sometimes. Am I even real? Am I even alive? And what does living mean anyways?

I posted something here a couple years back, and its as if nothing has changed. I’m just as miserable. If anything is different, its that …

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7

not weak

June 14th, 2017by nonserviam

depressed people are not weak. they are the strongest people. they fight more than anyone else and fall more than anyone else but still decide to get up. depression is a very deep battle inside a human being and is not fixed by blaming them for being depressed. love them no matter what they are going through, embrace them when they are frustrated for no reason and don’t give up on them. just don’t.

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2

not asking for help again

June 13th, 2017by Milestiba

I put off asking for help for months because of a doctor’s treatment in Fall 2015. So a few weeks ago I asked for help instead of risk organ failure with another failed OD. And they put me in that same hospital and I was assigned to the same doctor. I really wished I had just OD’d. He’s arrogant, has a God-complex and even the staff called him an a**hole. I only began to comply because they forced me to appear before a judge. But I just spent the whole last week lying just to get discharged. Now I am home and no better off. …

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17

Second

June 12th, 2017by Demonqueen

He’s destroyed me.

I won’t survive in prison.

He’s got what he wanted all along.
I won’t be able to have kids.

He’s destroyed every inch of me.
I have nothing left.

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2

He made me feel like a fool again. This time our relationship paid the price

June 10th, 2017by GerbzBaby

I’m irritated to say I’m writing about this particular “friend” again.  I’m beyond angry with him. If you don’t know we and him have a history of “love” together. The last time I hung out with him he was kissing me on the cheek, cuddling with me, laying on my leg/ chest and jealously asking about my love life. Which to me seemed as thoughts still like me but boy was I fucking wrong.

 

Today I found out that he  lead me on and fucked me over for my sister. At first he refused to tell me, saying I would be mad at him forever. Damn …

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2

First

June 10th, 2017by Demonqueen

I just really want to die.

The last seven years have been a blur.

But 7 years… 18-25. Years I haven’t lived.
Heck, I wasn’t even living before then.

Don’t get into a relationship, you’ll lose everything.
Time, friends, sanity, freedom are just a few.

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5

Goodbye

June 6th, 2017by My life is over

I’m gonna do it from me to humanity hold on and don’t give up stay strong.

 

 

It will be rope this time

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3

quiet house

June 6th, 2017by vee

tonight when i arrived from work, i was welcomed by silence and lights out, which meant everyone was asleep. i was not surprised, considering i just got here and it’s 11:10 pm. even though i understand why they’re asleep, considering it’s a Tuesday night, i still know that deep down i wish they were waiting for me. but they don’t care that much, and i understand that. i’ve felt very anxious all day, and i don’t know why, considering last night i tried to get more sleep than usual. it’s weird. speaking of weird; today is the birthday of an old friend of mine. she …

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6

Misery

June 5th, 2017by Purpleunicorns

Misery loves company

I lack company. All my 16 years it seems I’ve ever only known misery. I spend my time faking my happiness and crying alone in my room. I’m tired of being lonely. I’m not even bold enough to end it. *sigh* I just wish I had someone around me who even slightly knew this pain.

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3

1:41am

June 3rd, 2017by vee

you know those days where you wake up and decide you will definitely enjoy that day? you decide you’re going to do anything you can to feel happy and do everything you always put off. you feel determined and excited. today was supposed to be one of those days. since yesterday wasn’t the day off i would’ve liked it to be, i decided to try my best and have an acceptable day today. it didn’t particularly work, and i’m not surprised.
numbness is a very strange feeling. at first, you don’t understand it; but after a while, you forget how you felt before. what it feels …

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7

25 Days Left

June 3rd, 2017by nova88hb

(I wrote this a few days ago, so now I’m down to 25 days)

“I have always heard that you should never make a decision based on a whim, and that if you are in doubt, sleep on it, before deciding.  Considering the magnitude of terminating my own life, I decided to sleep on it quite a bit- I’ll give it a whole month.

My reasoning for this decision is not actually all that important.  There has been a building pattern of unhappiness in my life, and one event was finally the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back.  It was not the …

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