You never talk to me anymore. Yet, you still talk to everyone else. Everytime I see that you’re online, I send you a chat message asking you to please talk to me again. You reply to me with silence, or you just go offline. You dont know what you’re doing to me when you dont say anything back to me. I dont know what happened between us, we went from being the best of friends to complete strangers. I feel I am the only one trying to rebuild what use to be our friendship, but you stop me everytime I try. You never listen to me. […]
i don’t know how to survive anymore.
i cannot live this life.
i cannot stand this pain.
i can’t do this.
Continued from: here.
Letter didn’t go so well. I threw too many complaints at him at once, completely blindsiding him. But I had no other way to get it out. I was hoping this could open an avenue of discussion between us and we could be more comfortable around each other. Today… the next day… I feel like I’m choking. I was fine all day until he got home from work. He acts like he’s walking on eggshells around me. He says at dinner, “I would tell you about my day, but I’m not allowed to talk about anything negative.” … I had […]
Before I even start, I need to ask a question. I need a way to make it look like an accident. Just… Yeah. Okay, now to an actual rant and stuff.
For the past, ehhh, 3 years, I guess, my life has been going downhill FAST. I never really noticed it until now, probably because I was too young. I’m 13, atm.. Which is pretty young. I feel much older, though. Probably more hardships than someone much, much older. Anyway, time to start explaining. This may or may not be long, as I have trouble typing long paragraphs and such.
I guess I’ll start with my family. […]
ever since I realized how hurtful people’s words can be, I have hated myself. I always will, that will never change.
I know there are people in this world who truly love me, somewhere down in them, even though they don’t really show it. I’ve thought about committing suicide on one of my birthdays, I think it would be really cool to die on my birthday. wake up, get a rope, go to the living room, and hang myself before anyone else gets up. it’s perfect. but my birthday is so far away, ughh.
I always imagined who might be at my funeral, maybe some friends, relatives, […]
I want to bleed it out.
All the pain.
All the worthlessness.
All the torture.
All the wasted love.
All of the unused attention.
All of the exhausted emotion.
Everything.
I just want to be over.
Suicide is what i crave
Suicide is always on mine mind
twenty-four seven.
Its something that i need
desire even.
Its all i really want
for my birthday or Christmas.
I dont need anything
except suicide taking me away.
I crave it like a desirable sweet
we cant somehow have.
I cant controll myself,
its like an eating disorder
that i cant conqure.
I cant help myself
i just cant help it
I really do crave it
i can feel it.
what happened to the old sp where everyone cared and didnt post mean commments? where we were all here to help each other and this was a site of comfort and a site to get help? its really changed
I’m 20 with a 3yr old son. I love my boy more than life. But recently, I realized, I can’t feel anymore. The only thing I feel is that I’m waiting. Waiting for my mind to realize what my body has already decided… Suicide. I feel like I’ve been waiting ever since I was raped  when I was 12. That ruined me. I can’t afford a therapist or anything like that, so, I’m trying to find help on my own. Today and tomorrow, I will try. And no, what happened when I was 12 isn’t the only thing. I’m just tired of explaining it all. […]
Sometimes I wonder if I’ll actually do it. Will I ever kill myself? I might accidentally. Would I do it though? I might take 10 pills, but I might also think I’ll still wake up. I might slit myself all over and bleed and bleed. Will I actually KILL myself though? I came on this website after someone told me they didn’t love me. After they didn’t want anything to do with me. He told me he hasn’t for a while… So why did he pretend? I started cutting then. I started drinking because of him. I got into drugs. I smoked and I lied […]
It’s a funny thing when you look at this. An actual person who literally slices themselves open on a daily basis just to get away from the emotional pain and come back to a physical state. I bet there’s someone you’ve said something rude to that went home and add a another scar to their already beautifully scarred skin. So yes in a literal sense you just made a mark in their life and you are now embedded into their skin forever. When I put it that […]
Has anyone else attempted or desired suicide due to issues of complicated/compacted/atypical grieving? If so I would like to talk. So few people have experienced this or understand…..
8 months ago I intentionally overdosed. Unbelievably, my downstairs neighbor heard my body hit the floor and could her me retching through her ceiling…..she called emt…..i remember nothing but waking up in the hospital and my ex-husband and a friend coming to see me. But I don’t wish to discuss the hospital stay or the attempt.
Here is my story…..2 years ago, my 15 year old daughter and ex husband were in a horrific accident. I had to ID […]
Today I failed at being anything but worthless.I sat in the rain and cried.My time is almost up the date seems closer and closer I can’t go through humiliation.my fears have taken over my life.I relized happiness I something I could never have.today you said I was stupid and yesterday and all the days before that.you’re my infection I take my time to give you all affection I have nothing left.you hate me I hate me.the last thing I’m living for is fading away
I feel like my time is up in this world. I haven’t even accomplished what I want to accomplish. I feel like a total failure. I feel misjudged. I feel taken advantage of. I’m ready to go away now … If my family reads this, I love you.
Recently my life has taken a turn for tge worst. I had a decent life living in savannah, ga. Then my mom got diagnosed with stage 3 colon cancer. Moved back home (Jasper, ga) to be with her. It’s tough. So then tine passes, mom has defficulties with chemo, all going down hill. Well I have to have a regular colonoscopy as a check up. Time goes by. Yesterday I found out that my boyfriend of 4 years cheated on me. I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I have migraines from not eating. I feel like it’s my time to go. I wish God would […]
Before leaving this world I wanted to leave something behind. I’m 24 I have 4 year old son, that I love so much. So much. I’m mentally ill and have reached out to several people but nobody answered my cry for help. My son deserves better than me. My boyfriend has a gun, I suppose that is what I’ll use. I asked to please stay with me tonight but he left anyway. I’m wasting time. Please somebody… I don’t know what I’m asking for… goodbye
Since I was about eight, I’ve planned on commiting suicide. I planned everything out, and this was the year. After 8 years no one has noticed. No one has really even noticed me in general. I don’t think my death would touch people, or make anyone feel guilty. It’s not like I want it to, I don’t want people to notice, it’s just dumb that you can just go, and no one would care. Of course my family would be upset, and they would be angry. But I’m angry that they think they can treat me the way they do, and I’m ok with it. […]
ughhh I cant breathe. i hate myself. i hate myself. I HATE MYSELF. I just want to die. I wish my dad would give me my knife back. is he trying to torture me?? I need my knife RIGHT NOW. cutting helps me. I cant stop crying. im in too much freakin pain. i dont want to live. living is so morose and stupid. i wanna die.. SOMEONE KILL ME PLEASE. I JUST WANNA END THIS FUCKING PAIN.
Why doesn’t anyone understand the effect they have on people. They think they can get away being cruel people without any consequences.. Little do these people know that the people they hurt could be just about ready to kill themselves. Atleast in my case. Just about ready to hurt themselves. To cut their legs. To make themselves suffer because of the hurtful things they say. Because they make people like me think we are worthless. That we have no place here. That all we deserve is to be hurt and to suffer and make some of us think that the only way out is death.
The ones who want to die are stuck on this earth, and the ones who have everything and are doing fine are the ones who dies in accidents. So maybe if I pretend to love life I will die. Who am I kidding, I’m gonna live forever and I’m gonna suffer forever. No one even wants me around.
I HATE LIFE.