It’s my last day online, for tomorrow me and my partner are heading out to that beautiful location that points 350 feet down to freedom. Initially I didn’t want to say goodbye but I’m bored and so I guess I’ll write until time runs out. I’m not exactly sure what to tell the world, like fuck you all or be blessed. Tomorrow, I’ll celebrate like there’s no tomorrow… (haha! ironic, isn’t it) and I know i will for It’ll be the best day of my life. I have no guilt or regrets and I will not miss anything here although some of you have truely […]
id rather do nothing and be happy, than do something i know i don’t love.
but doing nothing never achieves something…
this evening was fun… almost forgot how much i hated this place… for a breif moment i even forgot how much i miss that place called home…
I like rabbit’s maybe i get one for like a pet I hope hammy made it to the forest anyway soon be easter I don’t under stand what’s it got to do with rabbit’s I don’t under stand the hole egg thing to o well.
Can’t sleep. Watching the same shit on tv that I always do… I’m just a waste of space. A waste of a person. I would trade my life for someone who greatly wants one like those poor kids who have cancer or leukemia. I would spare mine in a heartbeat. When I believed in GOD, I prayed to him asking him to take my life away and to give it to one of those kids….
Again, counting down the days that I actually kill myself. Feelings are stronger than I ever felt. I know I won’t live to see my 23rd bday. My gift to […]
Only come across the site yesterday, so thought what the hell I will join.  I’m not sure I have story’s to compare to some of what I have read, or that I am at the depths of despair – yet.  Following a series of events over many years a about a month ago I “snapped” went on a drink and drug induced rampage of smashing things up not eating or sleeping for almost a week, my friend took me to the doctors now on anti depressants, the feeling to end my life is still there however I no longer feel consumed by it 24/7, however some nights it still seems the […]
I have wants
that I know cannot be fulfilled
I desire a life
that is always fleeting
and will never be mine
Filled with dreams
that never take flight
Scared to hope
knowing I’ll be denied
So I’m left wandering
searching for something that matters
Idly waiting for something to happen
All the while knowing
expectations breed disappointment
I’m seen as cynical and dejected
but really I’m just being sensible
I keep wishing on flame-less candles
because, even light can’t save me now
I feel so guilty. There are so many people who have it way worse than I do. Who am I to complain when others are so trapped that they actually follow through and shoot themselves in the head? I know that everyone has problems, but some are worse than others, right? I hate my life, but I’m too afraid to actually kill myself. If I really did have a bad life, then I would have killed myself too. So maybe I don’t even deserve to be on here. I’m just a fake who wants people to feel bad for her. I’m just a useless, lazy, […]
I’m depressed. I feel like there’s no point to life. Am I wasting my time. Why am I here. Am I going to accomplish and fulfill my purpose. Materialistic things don’t even matter. You cant take them with you when you die. Suicide sits in the back of my mind. But what happens after that. Why am I not happy. Why am I always stressed out. Why do I not care about the people that love me. I’m searching for light in a room with no windows. Trapped in this box of emptiness. There’s no way out. Are drugs the answer. Is God the […]
I try to look calm on the outside to hide what’s going on inside.
The truth is a war’s being raged in me.
Two sides always trying to take control, but neither has won yet.
It doesn’t stop,
So let’s drown out the noise with some good tunes.
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Your work is the best Nujabes. RIP.
“And all the time that we walked barefoot in the sand somehow we never felt the rain.. I could walk off the hurt, run through the pain, wipe all the tears pouring down my face. Deny the dream that just never was. I just can’t walk off the buzz..” -Blessid Union of Souls
Well, it’s been nearly a year since the ‘big break up.’ I’m almost scared to believe it but, I think things are getting better. I think I’m getting better. I don’t constantly obsess over what could’ve been done differently anymore, and I’ve started feeling happy more often than I feel depressed. It could […]
Woke up earlier than usual, hung out with BF for a bit, ate some applesauce, went to his work to go charge my three laptops to find there was no internet access there…. So I’m planning on library, Friday. Anyway, that was 4 hours of almost complete bordem, just talked to BF’s Friend most of the time, and played either minecraft or mahjong on the laptop that had them. Dropped off at Kroger to turn in $17.70 in cans/bottles, and walked home. Sat around with BF, his friend and another friend until BF, the other friend, and and BF’s Cousin left do go shoot a […]
The time will come.
Slogans all over. False prophets emerged.
Kill the evils. Sacrifice. Repent your sins. Come to the Lord. Save yourself and for your own redemption.
While the real deal on Earth is only, not to let evil possessing you.
Good and evil are one thread close.
They all have signatures, and their markings are similar.
Swastika ! Those alleged good guys are marked with 7.
Of those four 7’s, all pointed to a centre.
Some with those 7 all flipped 180° . Some stack two 7’s head to head and create a mirror’s double effect of four 7’s.
But only the ones made up […]
I would cause a lot of stress on my family. But they would cry and get over it. My friends would not know so they would forget quickly. My love will die with me. Problem solved there.
I want to kill myself tonight. I have every reason to… I need someone to talk to.. Can’t stop shaking
It’s 8.. At night.
I’m sitting here.
Alone.
I’ve never been more happy.
I vow.
I vow, that christmas, this year, I’ll be happy, and not the ‘chrisitmas spirit’ happy.
I mean happy.
Sorry we couldn’t help change your mind but I know you’re going to be happier gone….
R.I.P….NihilisticThought
You helped me stay alive this long
I notice that a lot of people who post their pictures up are white. And you all are Very beautiful or handsome. Just wondering if there are any other Asian posters on here? Just to get a good idea.
Not caring what happened anymore.
Her legs gave out.
And as her, scarred up body, hit the floor.
She remained unscaved.
But her heart, was torn into a million pieces.
Her heart with scars of course.
Hello everyone. I posted on this site a few years ago under a different name and after reading your guys posts recently, I decided to post a lil bit about my life. For the past couple months i’ve been feelin extremely suicidal, like if I had a gun in my house or had easy access to a gun I woulda blew my brains out a long fucking time ago!! I’m on edge and extremely paranoid.. Paranoid about what?? I DONT FUCKING KNOW. Just in general. I ignore most of my friends phone calls because of my paranoia and barely leave my parents house and im a […]