I feel like it’s time. But I don’t want it to be. I made a promise to myself, you see. I promised to wait until I was 21 to find something to live for.
Even though I really want to wait, I’m just tired. Waiting is probably the best way to describe my life and I feel like I can’t take it. Also, my head hurts all the time, without apparent reason. I don’t want to feel pain anymore, but I don’t want others to suffer because of me.
I’ve always prefered to be hurt if that means that someone doesn’t. Maybe that didn’t make […]
Tag:
alone
I’m crying. So badly right now. All alone. I’m so fucking alone. That’s all I feel loneliness. Emptiness. And sometimes I feel nothing at all. One minuet I’m fine the next I find myself shattered into a million pieces. I can’t do this. I can’t. I just can’t. I’m giving up. I don’t know anymore. Don’t know what to do. Don’t know how to be happy. Don’t know how to fix this. I’m wondering if today should be the day.
I’m giving up.
I dont have any fight left in me. Im 30, I was married for 11 years. My divorce should be finalized next month.
He left me for someone else. He told our daughter shes her new stepmom. I never wanted kids yet I have three and a baby on the way.
My husband controlled my life. I wasnt allowed to work or go to college, for a long time I wasnt even allowed to drive.
Last year when he asked for a divorce I joined a dating website and met a man. I fell in love, I never loved my husband this way. This man turned out to […]
when I go on here and voice my thoughts and feeling, everyone is accepting, and it’s wonderful. No one freaks out and calls an ambulance to whisk me away to the hospital. no one tells me that I should ashamed of thinking about killing myself. They understand and it’s wonderful to know that I am not alone. No one I know has had even close to the same thoughts that I have everyday. they on,y get sad when something sad happens. it’s not a constant thing inside their bones.
anyone want to talk or need to? Im kinda bored really. so im up for it. studying alone on a Saturday is a hard thing to do. all my classmates graduated and im still stuck in my 4th year of uni. I need to get out of my house ASAP. tired of living here. need that independence! but its hard to reach.
I haven’t really gotten a chance to vent to others. Most of the time I’m too afraid to actually spill what’s on my mind to those closest to me, or my thoughts are too jumbled that I can’t really describe what I’m feeling very well so I have to brush it off and say ‘oh it’s nothing, don’t worry about it’ or ‘it’s a long story’. So when I saw this site I was pretty happy because not only can I actually say what I’m actually thinking without the fear of being stigmatized, but I can actually help myself cope by sharing everything that’s been […]
Why movies are better than reality ? Why movie is better than reality ? Why reality is boring ?
by niki
written by niki
Why movies are better than reality / real life / real world ?
Why movie is better than reality / real life / real world ?
Why reality is boring ?
What puzzles me the most is human’s mind / human’s brains and imagination better than reality ( human’s fantasy is better than reality )
for example:
just look at the movies, novels, comics, games, books, , animations (anime / manga), science fiction (sci-fi), fantasy , like Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Narnia, X-Men, Marvels & DC universe / movies , The Avengers , Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, Swords Art Online, Naruto, Bleach, […]
Why do people understand me and then I’m not afraid anymore to have friends and feel love because I know I am accepted for who I am and then they get tired of understanding me and get tired of me in general cuz most people in this world could care less about me and I’m alone again?
When I’m alone I feel sad, alone but when people come around its like a part of me wants to be happy then another part doesn’t…
I am trying so hard, so very hard to hold on. I’m only 16. People say your almost done hold on….? Almost done what? High school and move on to even more stress and pain. I’m trying so hard but I’m tired so very tired of trying.
Hey guys.
I have been in this sad mood since like forever. Sure, I’d laugh and smile, but when its me, and i am alone, my thoughts take over.
I am convinced that i am useless and basically nothing more than a burden and cause of irritation and frustration to the people around me.
So, i thought a lot, a lot about suicide, i even started to cut myself, i have stopped now though.
But i guess, i still wanna die.
Anyone know how to get over that fear of dying?? Like, i am afraid of the pain it takes and because i dont know what happens after i die.
Help, […]
Let me start off by saying I’m not new on this forum and that I have been suffering for a while now and I can’t take it anymore. I’m almost 17 years old and I have been fighting severe depression for several years now. This will be my last year of being in high school and I don’t even know if i’m going to graduate on stage with my class. I’m to stupid to even pass some of my classes as my anxiety and depression kicks in and I can’t focus or concentrate in any of my classes. There is this one test that my […]
I guess I am writing this for everyone else out there who understands what I’ve gone through. To know you aren’t alone nor are you ever alone no matter how much you may feel that way its not true. I have been battling depression and suicidal tendencies since I was 8 years old. From age 9 to 17 I was raped and molested by my friends father. He is in jail now, but it really messed me up. I started cutting starving binging and purging because i needed to control something again because of how much I had lost. I didn’t know what else to […]
I am 39 years old and I have never been married or had children. I have a job that causes me to have extreme anxiety (I take Xanax, amongst other things) and I dread going there every day. I can’t quit because I need the money to support myself. I feel like life has absolutely no meaning or purpose. It is just emptiness and suffering. I feel so alone and I’m terrified of getting any older. I have researched suicide and I have a plan and all the drugs I need. The only thing I lack is courage because I know it will be a […]
Ive pondered suicide countless time and time again but somehow i never can go though with it. I feel so alone and in such a big world where no one else is like me. Everyone is either to good for me or doesnt want anything to do with me. I try so hard to put a smile on my face everyday and please and brighten everyone eleses days around me yet somehow i never get the same in return. I dont want to sound like a brat because i knew many people are so much worse off then i amci just cant stop […]
I’m home alone. My parents are gone for the weekend. The urge to kill myself while they’re gone is as strong as its ever been and I fear I might do it tonight. I’m breathing heavily and my heart is pacing. I’m scared…
Another night. I’m by myself in my room and my mind is racing, a million different thoughts going through my head. My boyfriend won’t answer don’t have many friends it’s just me myself and not I but my thoughts. They haunt me at 1 in the morning they are the reason I can’t sleep. I’m scared of being cheated on being left. Sometimes I’m just so scared. But then when I’m by myself I just feel empty. Like there is no one there in the end. My thoughts are my enemy. I hate being alone. I just want someone who is there when I need […]
I’m at the point of buying a gun. The VFW next door to my apartment building has gun shows/sales every other weekend. I hate guns, but now I need one. Again, I feel like I’m losing my mind.
Even though I’m no longer taking my heart meds, it’s not happening fast enough considering how utterly lonely and miserable I am. My chest feels as if a huge weight is crushing me. The tears and sobbing come without warning. Why do I have to be alive? Why can’t I just drift off to sleep and leave this horrible world behind? 60 years of this crappy existence has […]
Today is one of those days when it’s difficult to just exist. When thinking is your worst enemy. When you just want to disappear.
Even though it hasn’t been a particularly bad day, nothing feels right. I’m such an useless pessimist.
-V
tired of being one. I wwant to avoid it but cant. and im so alone. If any of you people have someone in your life, like you have children or a fiancée , or bf/gf you guys are so lucky. you shouldn’t even be here, I hate you. if you cant see who ur with. im alone in this world and have no one to live with. ive had it, im tired of feeling misunderstood and lonely. im diseased no one is going to want me and its my fault. why keep living on my own? im so tired. I always think of cutting deep […]