He talks to me like im stupid and a bad mother. Im terrified of him as well…. im so far from home ive got no way to get back there away from him… im trapped here forever I guess…
bad
Every possible way to kill oneself comes with the risk of ending seriously messed up and worse than one was before. I am not depressed, I just want to die. I fucking hate existing. I have to suffer every fucking day. I feel bad for my mom and her pain but there is no point to my life on this pathetic planet. If there was a god, they’d have some fucking compassion for someone who genuinely needs to escape. Fuck. No one can understand.
I honestly don’t know. I feel like I’m losing my friends all over. I try to help a few friends struggling with school and stuff but I still feel worthless. It’s worse when they make fun of me for trying to help. “This isn’t you” blah blah
I even told them it’s because you don’t really know me and they just give me this look like I’m crazy. I absolutely hate it when they compare me to someone bad. My mom isn’t the greatest mom and she’s never home. The other day a so called friend said I’ll end up just like her […]
It is like feeling bad for the world as a whole, all the suffering of the living in general, every time I look outside, the cycle of death and life but the mindless hate and agony we inflict on ourselves, humiliations, hatred, and I can just sit there and watch our forsaken world die.
I have lost hope, we don’t learn, and it seems like I could have done difference, but no, I am just a worthless person, sitting and looking
This is honestly just a post to get out my thoughts because they just keep clouding my head.
Anyways, I’ve been so emotionally drained the last few months. Like, there are some occasions where I’ll feel happy, sad, or angry, but if it’s not any of those, then I’m literally numb to it. And even when I do feel those, I don’t know how to react to them. I just don’t feel anything; it’s like my whole body is disconnected from my feelings. I just don’t seem to care anymore about anything. My grades are getting worse & I only have 2 weeks to fix them, […]
hi my name is magnus i have went with depression being socially out and much more today i have gotten help but i feel that a childhood were i dont remember much else than a few good birthdays here and there othervise just alone bullied and allways fighting the other kids in constant paranoia when i was 8 to 10 years old had anger mannegement issues and all but after a depression i today at the age of 17 only just started at the age of 15 to feel happy and free from depression my doctors and parrents say that i prolly did not really […]
All the memories just replay in my head over and over. The good ones make me think how can this possibly be happening when things were so good? And the bad ones make me wonder what I did wrong and think of a million other ways I could have done things differently. Just over and over and over.
The only time I get away is if my sleeping pills work or I’m asleep. I feel like if I had the access and knowledge I would become an addict to something because I can’t imagine living a life being haunted by memories. How am I supposed to […]
I’ve been a shut-in for months now, only going out to get food. Lately I haven’t even been going out to get food. Been ordering food so all I have to do is go down 4 flights of stairs. But even that’s hard to do now. A lot of days I go hungry because I don’t have real food in my apt and I don’t even want to face the world, even if it’s so little as having to walk out my apt and go down and meet my delivery guys.
I feel pathetic but the only thing I do is go online, go to suicide […]
Always u hear on news bad things happen i always wonder why or how pple can just buy guns and or try to guns was made for protection i think they should do better job on keeping guns only to protection
This pulsating pain in my right shoulder, does it mean I’m awake? No… No, I’m obviously still dreaming. I know I should just keep dreaming but with all of the bs in the world, what’s the point? America’s considering voting for a stupid version of Hitler for President, a terrorist group thinks their plan makes sense when it really doesn’t and the world is one itchy, trigger finger away from World War 3! Hah, isn’t the human race wonderful! World peace will be achieved soon! “…And I thought my jokers were bad…” It’s a shame the answer is simple but humans are too fundamentally selfish […]
I was 7, my cousin 8yrs male, old told me that we are going to play boyfirend and girlfriend and I went with it not knowing what he would do next to me. We played for a while but then he started to play with my boobs thinking it was normal but I had a small feeling it wasn’t. At my age 9 and him at 10, we played again after that I went home and I was over hearing my parents talking about how I should know about sex and stuff cuz I had gotten my period too at that age and from that […]
I had a plan. But things keep moving from bad to worse and worse and fucking horrible.
It was going to be wonderful. Poetic in a way. Peaceful. Painless. Less traumatizing for whoever will find me. But fuck that. Tonight, Im taking a rope to a tree I usually run off to when my parents are at each other’s throats. I always find peace there. Now it’ll be forever peaceful, finally.
I can’t fucking stand it here. I hate this place. I love my field of work, but I hate the people and this entire work environment. I’m tired of being yelled at, especially for things that shouldn’t be my fault. I do what I’m told, so if I fail it’s because you didn’t tell me thoroughly what needs done. You can’t give me half of an assignment and expect me to know how to finish it correctly. But apparently that makes me a bad worker because I can’t read people’s minds or go back twenty years and learn how you guys do things here.
I don’t […]
I’ve been feeling weird for a day and a half, and it’s slowly starting to get to me. I’m not a self-harmer, but right now I want to cut myself so bad. I want to feel pain. I’ve always been someone who is against self-harm and thinks that it’s “stupid”, but right now I want to feel something other than this emptiness and sadness. I’m not scared, I don’t care that it’ll hurt.
I’m a below average statured man, yet i htink my looks may be not that bad. at a certain point in my life i began that noticing sometimes in public setting women would notice me.
Like this morning i went for lunch with my parents at a fine restaurent when then this gorgeous girl walked in with (i think) her Grandparents and they sat in a table next to us and it happened she noticed me.
Maby its the reason i’m feeling so bad today knowing that i’m a socially awkward fuck, that i dont have the guts and even if i had no woman whats to […]
So I haven’t been on this website in a while now. But I’m just in a bad place right now. I went off and started college and I thought everything would get better once I got away from the environment I was in,but everything just followed me. I started talking to one person who really wants to help me but the person is someone I can’t just entirely call up out of the blue and I don’t want to bug them with my problems because they have their own life and our relationship isn’t like that. And now I’m sitting here debating on what I’m […]
So yesterday was Thanksgiving here in the U.S. This last year (really the last 2 years) have been really bad for me, so I’m having a hard time feeling thankful/grateful about anything. Does anyone else on this site feel the same way? Also, how do any of you find things to be grateful for? I appreciate any and all suggestions.
My uncle killed himself last week. Drove out into the woods about 10 miles from his house and parked at the end of an old logging road. Tied his belt to his seat and hung himself. He had been missing for a few days before they found him. I wasn’t super close to him. I feel nothing. I want to hate myself for not feeling bad but it is hard to when I feel nothing. It’s hard to judge or hate when I have been considering the same thing for a while. How long did he think about it? What finally pushed him to do […]
I’m back again in SP, well, of course. Never actually left. I’m in a strange mood in a bad way so I think this will be a ranting post of how undecided/unsure I am about some important things. Just going to number them, I like structure, haha.
I’m sure I should exit. This is the correct and logical decision for me. And I have some arguments that are pro and against which totally confuses me.
I can fail. Although my method is quite sure, there is always a chance. Most likely I will back out because survival instinct is a ..tch. Then it will be a huge […]
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