Constant chest tightness, shortness of breath, racing heartbeat…can’t tell if it’s psychosomatic or an actual developing medical problem. Yikes.
I’ve been told I’m this ,that , and all things under the sun.
yelled at swore at , treated worse then the dirt we stand apon ..
Been mentally and physically abuse
been made and out that I’m a nobody nothingness ..
And they don’t ask how I’m doing
they don’t see that I’m fulling
that I can’t breath
that I’m filling up my body with discuss
my soul is literally nothing
my mind is full of hate
and I’m giving up .
A child so small learning how to open your eyes .takeing your first breath in this beautiful world.
A mother looking down into the eyes of your heart. Learning the truest love on this earth the for your child.
Five days in this world smiling from ear to ear .
A mother looseing her breath because her heart is loosing his .
Five days old in pain eating threw a tube and under a microscope.
A mother finding her heart then finding other worldly fear of looseing it .
Her heart under a knife.
Tears of joy are now filled with fear.
A father see his son taken into the sky baby first […]
So here i am in church and the only thing i want to do is leave and and cut myself he is talking about depression. So its not like i cant.Relate but i cant breath and i want ro leave i understand what the pastor is saying.but i cant. All he talking about is suicide and o get god you you dont like it i want do it. Dont give up in your convince and hope and you will be rewarded. Ok i get but damn. I cant breath and I want to leave .
Do you ever wonder what it feels like to have the cold end of a pistol pushed against the side of your head? Do you ever wonder what it feels like to suffocate inside of a car? Do you ever wonder about the endless feeling one feels while falling toward the end? Do you ever wonder how bright headlights are as they come barreling toward you in the dark? Do you wonder how a rope feels squeezing your neck? Do you ever wonder how horrible it feels to be poisoned beyond intoxication?
Do you ever wonder how that last breath feels? Do you wonder how stiff […]
Operator: 111 Emergency, what service do you require?
Me: *pants* Police… I need to report a robbery.
Operator: One moment, I’ll put you through to police area comms.
[Phone clicks, dialtones are heard, a person answers.]
Comms: Police, how can I assist you?
Me: …I’ve been robbed. A robbery.
Comms: Okay sir, are you in any immediate danger?
Me: No, I… I think she’s gone.
Comms: Okay, are you having any trouble maintaining this conversation or any coherence whatsoever?
Me: I have my faculties about me. I’ve been robbed — not lobotomised.
Comms: Of course, sir. Can you please describe the person who robbed you and […]
Hello loves 🙂 So I haven’t been feeling exactly chipper lately, and I think I’ve found something helpful.
You can go somewhere you think no one will hear you, or you can just stay in your house. Grab your pillow if you want to try and muffle the sound- but I recommend just letting it out.
Now, take a deep breath (haha see what I did there) and just scream your freaking head off.
Now I don’t mean a half assed yell- I mean a fucking battlecry against everything you’ve ever faced as a challenge or a foe.
Just a suggestion
For everyone who tried to say that the 20 year old at least liked me. I had a feeling I couldn’t hold my breath on him because it’s a lie. So there you go. No one can like me just like I said. He lied.
You wake up in the morning and the first breath you take you can feel the sadness fill your lungs. You can feel yourself gasp for air as it completely consumes you. Leaving you just laying there praying you can make it one more day. One day without the thought, sadness, or confusion of why you belong on this earth. What is my purpose?
I have a total failure life…
I dont get along well with anyone…
I was so different from all my family members since i was born…
I feel that no one understands how i feel…
I also have a failure marriage
A failure relationship life…
I lost all my dreams and goals…
I dont know how i can get myself happy and smile again…
I feel like every moment i m living in this world is a suffer…i can hardly breath…
I wish i have no exist in this world at all…
I m just a total failure…thats all…
i cant speak. everytime someone trys to get me to talk about my feelings i choke on my words. I’ve always kept my emotions in i guess i got used to not talking about them. someties its just random things like about my day or whatever its hard. i start to breath heavily and i get scared then wont say anything. my best friend ariana gets mad when i do that but i cant help it!
This is the last place that I’m willing to share my thoughts. I’m tired of trying to help people understand how I feel about life; it’s a waste of a breath. As a self-professed nihilist, one of the big rules that I live by is that “it doesn’t matter what other people know”. Trying to convince anyone of anything is a waste of breath. Just leave them all to their own meaningless thoughts and I’ll stick to mine.
But here, I’m as close to being around comrades as I’ll ever be. Even though I feel half dead from a viral infection in my chest, that
This is the end,
Hold your breath and count to ten,
Feel the earth move and then,
Hear my heart burst again..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l6W_0B1nDvw
Lyrics:
In woeful throes of youthful lust,
I held my breath as you held my hand.
Heart to heart, flesh to flesh,
honesty, emotion long repressed.
Confidence and poise that I could never imitate
as you led me down the stairs to where my hopes had lied in wait.
This is how I choose to remember you,
in the light of some hallway I’d never know again.
“Please stay with me.”
And even though our words were wasted, they had never been more true.
Your gentle wrists, your sacred smile. Each longing breath, I take for you.
Today is a day I don’t want to live
I don’t want to breath
I don’t want to smile
Thinking is out of the question
I want to cry and scream
I go through so many days just doing life
When I sit down and think about life
I drop
My mental thoughts decline
my smile fades to tears
I lose it
spending time on my own is bad
i decline to suicide
Death is pending
life is lengthy
I feel i have done my amount of time containing all the hurt i need
the broken hearts are unbearable
My life needs to stop
But i breath through another day
I’ve pushed away everyone who I used to care about. Each morning before school I sit in the library reading a book in a pathetic attempt to escape reality. The bell goes and I’m scared to go to class, then I become aware that I’ve forgotten my timetable. I get this sinking feeling and the anxiety starts to kick in. I’m shaking and I can barely breath when I realise that I’ve now got to speak to someone and ask where to go. Walking to class I’m pushed, laughed at and of course I end up running into one of my old friends, the one […]
Every since I found this site it was like a breath of fresh air.. I was finally able to say what was on my mind without scaring people away lol And I would read other peoples post and think did they actually go through with it.?? I really appreciate everyone that commented with words or encouragement and understanding. But its my time. This will be my last post I give up. I’m tired and this time ima make sure I succeed I wish everyone luck in life
Bye
I’ll follow the trace of your breath’s exhale
down a river of gold with a shattered glass sail
I’ll visit lands of sapphires and lustrous ebony
to find the taste of ambrosia equal to your beauty
I’ll write poems with glass, in words melted with sun
and sing ballads of skies for the most beautiful one
your tears are the straw I will spin into stars
to become iridescent and celestial martyrs
blessed by the presence of a prophesied king
I’ll put perennial wax on your magnificent wings
let me embellish your body with invaluable jewels
to demonstrate my undying love for you
you’re a shimmering blaze of […]
I am not a coward. This is me drowning my breath, in a vast ocean of red dead redemption. I’m cut from the monstrosity of a soul, and I have spared none, in violating its ability to resist this temptation. Patience, while I stimulate a selfish behavior for once. This is not a suicide note, I’m not that dramatic. When I decide to stain the sheets with anguish, it will be the most peaceful and quiet release. Like the terrible silence of an antic gun. Like the […]
This was a song popular when I made my first “attempt” as a bullied teen (yes, bullying was taking lives back in the early 70’s). It became another of my audition pieces. It’s a tribute to artist Vincent van Gough, who died by suicide:
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