Always u hear on news bad things happen i always wonder why or how pple can just buy guns and or try to guns was made for protection i think they should do better job on keeping guns only to protection
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I’m afraid I’ve gone bad again. Well let’s be honest… I was never fine.
I’ve quite my job where I had to handle all the sexual harassment from my boss.
My “friends” don’t really reach out to me. I kind of don’t care yet it hurts .. does that make sense?
Still planning on my second attempt.
I did buy an anxiety toy so I can at least deal with that somehow.
But to be honest. The day for me to go seems closer and closer. Slowly.
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
Have you every heard the term downward spiral? I think I am more than half way down. One of the foreshadowing thoughts I have is knowing that I am not at rock bottom yet. The realization that I have even more misery to come is almost worse then the thought, that I now look fondly on days I thought was the worst day of my life. Days when I thought life couldn’t get worse are now happy memories because at those moments, I was so much better off than I am today. Try all I want there is no going back. I am getting older […]
I’m sorry, she’s a good person but I’m pissed off and frustrated at her right now! I asked her again tonight when I can get my own Visa card so I can buy the peaceful pill eHandbook. She got on her high horse and said “this is a bad book I can’t do it”. I said “how is it a bad book?” She said “I did research and it gives you contacts”. I said so? I want a freaking book using my own money and I got freedom of information!!!!!!!!! She said “your crazy”. I said – let me buy the damn book! She said […]
I am finally gonna buy it online for a 24 month subscription once I get my gift card. I hope this golden book will guide me to the pearly gates of eternal nothingness.
The reason I’m still here, as many of you know, is due to my lack of appropriate resources, and my desire to die a peaceful and calming death. I consider myself a student at the College of Suicidology with the goal of graduating from life with a Masters Degree in death.
Despite what our CULTure and the psychiatric establishment thinks about euthanasia, I own myself, they do not own me! I don’t have to submit […]
I am getting ready. I just want somewhere to say it. I can’t tell my friends excitedly about my plans, so I’ll tell you all.
I filed for residency last week. I will get my ID here soon. Then I can buy a pistol. I already have one chosen. Then I can take a concealed carry class and always feel safe, knowing death is always close if I need it. Though I still intend to wait until january, the weight and surety of a gun both soothes me and revs me up. Six more months. Six more months and I’m allowed to quit.
Just six more months.
So […]
No matter how soon or how much more of this year I’ll see, I really want to do one more thing. I’ll have to buy another cheap tattoo kit like the one I had before and take the risk of attempting it with the hand I don’t normally write with. But I want “I’m not human” written on my arm. I at least want it known when I die what my main problem was and that sums it up. I took a chance earlier and put my soul crushing experience on a very public forum just to vent it out that yes I am hurt, […]
The slam poetry scene in my state has been a veritable haven when I can actually get myself to attend an open mic/slam feature night. I hope this poem can help at least one person like it did for me.
Kait Rokowski – “A Good Day”
http://youtu.be/TjjaIwVxfTw (to see her recite it)
Yesterday, I spent 60 dollars on groceries,
took the bus home,
carried both bags with two good arms back to my studio apartment
and cooked myself dinner.
You and I may have different definitions of a good day.
This week, I paid my rent and my credit card bill,
worked 60 hours between […]
I just found out that I don’t have to have a gun permit to buy a firearm in my state!
by wndozh8er
written by wndozh8er
Am I missing something here? There has got to be a catch!
dear fellow readers
I am trying to find some pills that will help me fall asleep to death. However, I do not know what sleeping pills are strong and how many i should take in order for me not to wake up? Do you have any suggestions what kind of pills I can take. I want to take some pills that i can easily buy from the store without a prescription, however I am willing to buy pills over the counter. Just need to tell me how i can convince my doctor to prescribe them for me.
yours truly,
danylost
I’ve had depression, anxiety and anger problems for years now. I have my good patches, I have my bad. Currently it’s my longest run of bad patch, over 2 months of consecutive bad days no good ones filtered in there, it’s taking its toll really.
I have a lot of responsibility, I run a business, I just received a loan from my parents to buy a car. Every time I try and see a psychologist something comes up, a business meeting, all of my bills come out on the same day so I have no money. The problem is the bad days just keep on coming, […]
“I close my eyes only for a moment, and the moment’s gone
All my dreams pass before my eyes, a curiosity
Dust in the wind, all they are is dust in the wind
Same old song, just a drop of water in an endless sea
All we do crumbles to the ground, though we refuse to see
Dust in the wind, all we are is dust in the wind
Now, don’t hang on, nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky
It slips away, and all your money won’t another minute buy
Dust in the wind, all we are is dust in the wind
Dust in the wind, everything is […]
Anyone else noticing all of the newer people with amazing taste in music? 40 days. ICantDrownMyDemons. Sickfromthemelt. Yeah. You guys are fucking awesome. Just putting that out there.
It’s been a rough night. My anxieties are getting the best of me again and I’m not sure how to handle it. Work sucked. But Friday nights always do. I don’t know what’s eating me today. Will someone please buy me food and tell me I’m pretty? >_<
This is the crap in my head. It will probably never go out to anyone but maybe if I post it here it will help me.
I cheated on my boyfriend with my supervisor. After being with him for 10 years and begging him for marriage and kids, after he broke up with me twice I cheated on him. Through the years everytime I felt neglected or ignored i’d get depressed and flirt with guys around me. I never actually liked, was attracted to or gave a shit about these people but the attention was like a drug a quick hit to make me feel better. […]
so much shit has been going on this the first time in a while that I had a chance to breathe and just let the tears flow because after this little moment its back to reality ik I need to leave this place my therapist said it was not a safe place and I never knew what she meant but now i know.. That place is eating me alive there’s no love or comfort I need to get away in trying to come up with the money to buy a bus ticket and get the fuck away from here I just need to survive until […]
I’m here. I’m with a man that I love, but idk how much he loves me. I’m still here, but he needs me for work. I know he could do it by himself, but it’s easier with two, and he wouldn’t have to pay a helper/assistant. Sometimes he acts like he really loves me. Sometimes he’s a monster. Says I have alot of making up to do. I was a horrible drunk for our first year together, so now I have to suffer. We haven’t had sex in over a year. This blows my mind. He’s amazing in that way, but now we […]
Bullshit nonimportant post
The words you say to me. The words you say behind my back. “Don’t tell her anything she might kill herself.” You saying in front of everyone. They laugh. Why would they care anyways? It’s not like I was ever their friend. But to the girl that said that I was. I was her friend. And I thought I was being a good friend by telling her the truth. But I guess I was wrong… next class I have people laughing at me. Saying stuff about me because I was trying to help out a “friend”. My real friends say with me and said it […]
They can’t harm you
Locked in this chair
The TV blares in the background
Like it is your friend
The two dimensional connection
It’s almost like they’re looking at you
Outside this room
Where the skin gets peeled
Nobody licks your wounds
They look right through you
On their way to their next appointment
Your blood marks their shoes
But still they don’t know you
So where do you find the hand
The promise that this is not a bad joke
That you are not just dark space
The phone rings
Somebody wants to sell you something
You tell them that they’re voice doesn’t matter