Okay, so, I’ve been diagnosed with depression for just over four years now, and frankly I’m getting a bit tired of it all. My friends simply do not have the capacity to understand. I, an eighteen year old girl, cannot stand my own reflection. I have created this smiling persona, which serves its purpose of falsely leading the people around me to believe that I am ‘okay’, who is able to get all A’s at A Levels, but actually, I couldn’t give a shit. But maybe that’s the fluoxetine speaking? A few grades can’t make me want to live any more than the monotonous personalities […]
Tag:
Depression
The Suicide Project is a website devoted to allowing people to share their stories of desperation and depression… and ultimately of hope. We hope that by allowing people to share their stories of despair with one another, they can find a reason to live, a reason to survive another minute. Another hour. Another day.
You left me, James. Not even a text or a message to say you were ending it. I know I wasn’t the best friend I could have been… should have been… But I wish you’d at least tried. I would have tried to help, even though I was so far away. Maybe I could have talked you out of it for a little while… maybe it would have been long enough for you to realize that maybe suicide wasn’t the thing for you. You could have had so much.
I feel so selfish, sitting here and thinking as I write this, that maybe all the […]
I don’t like to say that things in my life are bad. Because bad is such an arbitrary word. Bad to one person can hold an entirley different meaning to another person… So what is bad really? Then, there’s so many components to the things that I DO truley believe are bad… which leads me to question if it’s really bad at all?
That being said, I don’t know if things are bad. The things I am about to expond upon are the events that I am trying to base my opinion off of… the events that foster my emotions. I’m not saying that I’ve had it bad or good. I’m […]
No one wants to be friends with a person that has hideous scars, or wears long sleeves all the time, or that enjoys rainy, gloomy days like me. My depression kills people. But i wouldnt be so depressed if I had friends. Someone that actually understands my pain..nobody wants to be friends with a girl that prefers the color black or that wants to stay in and watch movies. Nobody wants to be friends with that girl..that sits alone at the lunch table..waiting to breathe..waiting for someone to ask if the seat across from her is taken. No one wants to be friends with the girl […]
Im new to this site i found it on a really bad day. In which i tried to kill myself. But here is my story.
My family has a history of clinical xepression and i was lucky enough to have it as well. I was officially diagnosed when i was 17 when my girlfriend at the time found me with a heroine needle in my arm with the intention of an overdose. I was in the hospital for three days then i was in inpatient for a couple wee ks. And since then ive been struggling with it. Recently it has been made worse by […]
how did u guys make it through ur depression or thoughts of suiside because i just dont wat to do and i dont realy have anyone to go to so im hoping this website will help me because i am havin a realy hard time with this please i dont have any where else to turn please my mom adopted mom doensnt care about me at all so this is all i have
I’m not here to preach, I’m not here to tell you everything is going to be the same as it was, I’m not here to persuade you against the decisions you have already made, but maybe just maybe I can make you feel better about things. Even if it is only temporary.
Suicidal thoughts and tendencies are not considered normal in the mental health world, but there’s 7 billion people on this planet and over half will at some point feel the way you do now. I know your eyes are starting to roll into your head and that urge to tell yourself ‘yeah this guy […]
I’m the good girl in my family. The smiling one. The girl who’s always offering to help out around the house. The girl my parents have never really had to worry about. I only ever argue with my sister, and I get on really well with almost my whole family. I’m the bright, spirited one. I have an opinion on everything, but I accept everyone. I’m the kind and loving girl and my parents constantly tell me how much I mean to them.
But that’s changed so suddenly.
In just a matter of days, I’ve fallen apart.
The thoughts have been there for years, but only now are […]
Hello, I’ve been gone a while.
but I’m back.
I’ve set a date. I’m going to go April 10th.
Yes, It’s a while away, but I still need to plan. Get everything together, have enough time to say goodbye and such.
I’m going to go by pills.
I’ve decided.
I’m tired of always being in pain, physically or emotionally, I’m very tired of it. And yes, I’ve tried therapy, I’ve tried anti-depressants, I’ve tried to have someone to depend on, but nothing’s working. I believe this is my destiny.
And I’m going to fulfill my destiny.
I know this is permanent, I’m aware.
And I feel empty. I feel okay […]
Why did this have to happen?… the world hates people like me and I dont know how to make people happy now…. my mom is getting re-married my dad wants to kill himself my brother is never home and when he is he never wants to talk to me I even have got to the point I cant go on anymore…… It would be best for everyone too they all hate my soul…..I have been shot.. stabbed..and my own mother said I was just better off dead because the world doesnt need another *****…..why?…..why is thhis going on right now?……. please….help…..me……….
I’ve been counting down the minutes at my high school. I can’t take much more of the classes I’m in. I have hubby bars to combat my depression, but will it help my lack of motivation? Will it help me deal with my deep love for my cousin? Will it protect me from throwing my life away, because life is pointless?
In my FOA2 class, which is Focus on Algebra 2, I was talking with my classmates about the glass is half full and half empty and took the pessimistic viewpoint. It’s significant because that’s my personal viewpoint and I clearly stated it, you have […]
it’s sad to think i’m only fifeteen and i have tried to kill myself two times. yes two times. my mom found me both times, in the bathroom. In seventh grade i lost my best friend to suicide, i just wanted to see her. so i thought if i cut deeper i would bleed out. i passed out and i woke up in the hospital. they gave me pills for depression and i had to go to therapy. the second time i tried to i almost OD on pills i found in my moms room, i couldn’t get the bottle open and i was screaming […]
“some gaddamn time…a man’s due t’ stop arguin’ with hisself. feelin’ he’s twice the gaddamn fool he knows he is….’cos he can’t be somethin’ he tries to be every gaddamn day without once gettin’ to dinner time and not fuckin’ it up….i don’t wanna fight it no more. understan’ me charlie? an’ i don’t want you pissin’ in my ear about it. can you let me go to hell the way i want to?”
—wild bill hickcock, deadwood.
that’s the second to last post on my facebook page. Â only one person got what i was saying. but it was only after another conversation that it […]
I’m a freshmen in college and I have not made alot of friends. I started getting anxious junior year of high school and it ended up being a social thing where i felt like i was constantly being judged by EVERYONE and still do. Either the social anxiety has caused me to be deeply depressed for about 2 and a half years or the depression has made me so withdrawn from being social with old friends and trying to meet new friends that my life has become a very boring one.
For an extrovert like myself it is literally torture to be sitting in my room […]
I Have Depression .. Really Bad. I Get Blamed For Everything, I Find My Self Ugly , Fat Or Even No Good! When People Tell Me Im Pretty I Think There Lying. When Im Upset And Somebody Askes Me “Whats Wrong” I Usually End Up Crying Right At That Moment. I Been To A Clinic To Get Help. Im Now On Depression Meds Now! When Im Upsett Or Real Low The First Thing That Comes To My Mind Is Suicide. It Feels Like I Have No One To Talk To. To Trust. I Feel As Though Im A Loser 🙁 I Get Picked On At […]
Hi guys, I hope every is feeling better today, even its just a little better, better is better.
I have started teaching at the weekends, its one of the ways i cope with my deppression, i used to be seriously depressed a few years ago, after a few trips to the er a few weeks in rehab and with the help of a new found friend i have my life back.
I work in a rape crysis center, so i talk to people on prohibly the worst day of there lifes, its tough and it tears me upinside, but i achually get to help someone it makes it all […]
I’ve gotten a request or two for my story so here it goes. I was born into a fading family. My dad bailed n left my mom, leaving her with a 4 year old son and me, an unborn child. She decided she couldn’t care for both of us, so she gave me to my adoptive parents. They’re possibly two of the worst people on the planet. From age one, they imposed their wills on me. They hovered around me constantly and everything I did had to be approved. My dad liked to “play fight” and manipulate my joints to cause pain. He threw me […]
I don’t come onto this website to plead for your guys’ sympathy. Just want to get that out there.
I reach out to this website because I have absolutely no-one to tell in real life. I don’t enjoy harsh words towards me when it is about my problems, how I feel, or how “stupid” my situation sounds. But I do choose to post them instead of just erasing them because I love to hear your input, and perhaps even gain a friend or two from it.
Anyhow~ Â I just want to go on the longest rant of my life. And share some stuff. I’ve been depressed […]
Just saying, but I never really was into poetry. I’m sorry if I say things wrong, have horrible grammar or any other mistakes as I am currently high on weed.
Now then, with that cleared up, I’d like to bring back what I might talk about right now. I am absolutely in love for my cousin and want to be with her. My friend finally hooked me up with the hubby bars I wanted as you can see. I hate the poetry on here.
Since weed is considered a truth serum (used in the 1920’s by cops on mobsters to find all the drug […]