So…It’s been a cliché to say that you feel that your heart is shattered into millions of pieces because your boyfriend or girlfriend broke up with you, but I have to admit that I’m my case, I’m sorta glad my relationship is over. About two hours ago my “boyfriend” broke up with me because I didn’t text him back…I know, stupid right? But anyways, all he said is “I’m leaving you” and all I said was “okay” and I didn’t burst into tears or jump up and down laughing, I mean, I honestly had no reaction, life went on and I don’t feel horrible or […]
I’m done… Just wished I had a gun right now, so I could kill myself. I hate my life. I FUCKING HATE MY LIFE!!!
I’m NOT happy, I never was and I’ll never be. My parents don’t understand me, they only make me feel more worthless and lonely, like I’m a piece of trash, a mistake. Constantly have arguments with them because they don’t understand me. Therapy doesn’t work, medications doesn’t work. I’m just desperate… Don’t know what to do anymore. The only way out I see is killing myself, and actually it’s a pretty good option for me I guess. What’s life worth when […]
“In the end
As you fade into the night
Who will tell the story of your life
And who will remember your last goodbye
Cause it’s the end and I’m not afraid
I’m not afraid to die”
I’ve been really angry and full of hate lately, It makes me feel like crap when I take my issues out on the people I’m close to because nobody knows about the thoughts I’ve been having except the people on suicideproject and one person I know who doesn’t talk to my family and friends, I guess because they don’t know how I feel they don’t get why I’ve been […]
I realize that I got ahead of myself in the last post, left out some key points…. left out reasons why. At this point I sat down in class, this stuff I have not shared….I had enough of being a freak show for one day. I go to school with about 100 students…. I am the youngest there…. only a baby…. only 18. I moved away from my family to go to school. I wanted to be happy, I was free of the shadows and pressures that suffocated me day after day. I wasn’t happy, I never was. I didn’t know anyone, so I didn’t […]
If I were to be honest for a change and told you what was inside me. All the demons I fight every day. How much regret I have for everything I have done. If I told you that I want to kill myself. Would you understand? Probably not. Everyone looks at me like I’m insane. All the scars on my arms and legs it reminds me that my past is real. Every day I look in the mirror and hate what I see not just the outside the inside too I feel so ugly. I’m full of anger and sadness. I’m deprived from happiness. I […]
Yesterday in a particularly bad time I decided I was finally going to end it. At that time (when I was clearly not thinking rationally), I was determined and committed. I have been depressed for a while but when this all happened something really horrible happened and I had no way to work through it on my own. I know everyone says that and I don’t want to say the entire story, but basically a person who had sexually, physically, and emotionally abused me for several years somehow got my contact information and called me just to fuck with my mind, and it set off […]
Heh,so I guess I really just wanted to say goodbye I guess, haha!
I guess it might be my “last cry for help” or something like that…?
Anyways, I guess I just needed to get it off my chest that I’m really leaving.
I’m scum and this is what I deserve, I had friends that helped me through thick and thin, but I couldn’t get over being depressed… I ruined them!
Mmmmm… I hope they don’t find out what I do, but at the same time I do?
It hurt like hell to detach from them and… after they stopped me from my last attempt they either know I can’t […]
The drive and the will have already been established. The only thing that remains now is to write out the truth and buy a gun. As soon as I get a place of my own, I can basically consider the both of those done and done. Funny… I never thought I would come back to this point, but never say “never,” I guess? To have dreams and ambitions wasn’t enough, I guess. At any rate, it’s good that I finally found out why I’ve been alone so long. The answer was right in front of me. Why now? Why couldn’t it have been sooner?
I wish I lived in a world […]
The condition of one of my rooms is absolutely, horribly disgusting. There’s spilled soda soaked into the carpets, crumbs all over the floor, dirty laundry, and probably something like 30+ bottles of empty diet soda.
I guess the reason I am posting this is that I am ready to die but too depressed to go through the preparations. I am thinking about hiring someone to clean out my car, pack up my belongings, etc. because I want to have a rational, planned out suicide and will never make an impulsive decision to do so. But unfortunately, I am too tired to go  through with the cleaning and […]
The thing I felt in the beginning was the control I had. Finally I found something where I, only I, had the control on. But now, after more than 1 year, I still do that thing, but it doesn’t give me control anymore. Actually I have totally no control on it. But still I’m doing it, because it gives me a good feeling. For a few seconds. Fight after fight, a battle with myself, got no control on it. It’s was the main reason why I was cutting in the begin. But now it’s not the reason anymore, because there’s no control anymore while cutting. […]
This is my first post. I’m  a 31 yo female, a cutter, overweight and ugly….I deal with the pain every day. My dad is getting on in years and he has been forgetting a lot lately, which makes me even more sad becuz I know that he has real reasons to be depressed and want to die, but he doesn’t. But maybe it’s cuz he forgot he wanted to. My pain is mostly from love.
In 2011 I met someone I fell in love with, hard, and I know he didn’t feel the same way. How could he, I’m me! But over all this time […]
Hello. This is my first post here. IÂ don’t really know why I’m writing this. I guess I just want to spill it out. May be it will help me to cope with my feelings.
I feel so angry at myself for complaining about my life. I mean look at the world around us. People are dying from hunger, from war, from diseases, from cancer….and here I am. Safe and sound…well…for now…
I’m almost 18. Feel like 12 years old to be honest. How did I even get that old. So fast.
I dont have anything to hold on to. Relationship with my family is…how can i put it…not the one […]
Hello everyone ! I’m doing this project i call ‘Tell me your story’. I did a facebook page & a blogspot. But I need YOUR help to make this work.I want to provide a way for everyone to interact with each other. This is how it works. You tell me your story, I tell everyone else. You could be known or stay on anon. It’s all up to you. What matters is that your story will be heard. People will know that you exist. You will leave a trace that you once existed. You will help other not do the same mistakes you did or […]
Here I am one year later. Why do I even try to kill myself.. Â Well, recently I haven’t really tried.. I’m bored of waiting to have an opportunity. I’m bored of wanting to die.. Most days are better then others and death seems too…. sigh.. death seems too what? too…. the same. Like everything on this place. Most of you guys want to die.. but what happens next? As long as you’re gone right.. What if there was no heaven or no hell. You’re just stuck in your coffin awake for eternity.. Would you regret.. Would you lose your mind? A month ago I had […]
In a happy mood feeling like the cookie monster and laughing and smile ….i guess here i am dont watch the hair please me and it was fighting 🙂
I’m desperate.
For excuses.
For reasons.
For encouragement.
Every night I have to convince myself not to do something drastic.
I have to look at myself in the mirror, and I have to lecture myself for so long just to tell myself not to cut, not to think terrible thoughts, not to attempt suicide, not to cry, not to do anything that harms myself.
I think I’m losing myself.
I’m not feeling as how I used to.
I can’t stay happy. I fake a smile when I’m in school.
But I don’t talk. People talk to me, and I nod as a sign that I’m listening. I’m done with talking.
I don’t know if I’m […]
I am 15, male.
My whole life basically consisted of people telling me how bad or disappointing I am. It still happens, just not as much because I don’t ever talk to anyone except for online. I mean I remember when I was three in daycare and I would get mad a lot and no one liked me. I had no friends really except my neighbor who I think was annoyed with me a lot. Then I remember being annoying a lot when I was 4 or 5 and my neighbors were really annoyed with me. Like when I would play basketball with my neighbors […]
I’ve been depressed for about 6 years. Â I’ve been thinking pretty much these thoughts throughout the entirety of that time period- the thoughts becoming more complex and clear or unclear as time passed. Â I’m 18 now. Â It has been especially bad this year getting ready for college. Â The thoughts of moving out and beginning the rest of my life are eating away at me. Â I never really thought I would get this far but I did. Â The fact that I’ve only been here 18 years is killing me. Â I’ve only been here 18 years. Â How can I possibly put up with 70 more years […]
I have missed three psychiatry appointments because I don’t want someone to tell me I’m depressed nor do I want to believe in the existence of depression. (Which is a damn contradiction cause I’m a psych major and I know it does). I don’t want pills. I don’t want to talk about how I feel. The furthest I ever got to getting help was to the door of my psychiatrist’s office. I freaked out and left. I’m doing a half-ass job in everything. My GPA went down wayyy low. Money, my biggest motivator doesn’t even wake me up in the morning for work anymore. Guess […]
I feel like maybe I can actually do something for the good. I try to make everyone happy but at the end of the day I’m not. I feel bad for getting angry with myself for stuff I can’t control. Maybe I will wake up tomorrow with a smile on my face and feel better. I can only hope. I hope everyone is doing good tonight.