I really don’t know why I should live and suffer? My life is hoepless. People say we shouldn’t kill ourselves cause the ones who love us would be sad, but I don’t need to worry about that, I’ve got no family, I don’t have any friends, and I’ve never been in love. I’m sure nobody will be sad if I die. I’m poor educated, and too old and too poor to go back to school. And of course, my job is not the good reason to live, it doesn’t give me satisfaction. and I’m middle aged and very sick, I’ve got no chance to have […]
Job
Okay, so I’m starting a new thread because I was hijacking someone elses with my problems and that’s not fair at all, I feel really bad about doing that. I’m sorry.
I basically wrote my story in a comment so I’ll just paste it here and explain a little more.
Such a long story.. I was so desperate last night. I still am and I don’t know what to do. I’m 20 years old, still living at home and I don’t have a job. My biological dad killed himself as did my uncle, we were very close. My mom, who has been married to another man for […]
Well I think the time has finnaly come for me to step into the shadow of darkness
I’ve lost my job, I have no family or friends, no pets, no plants, no reasion to live,
obese and 54, no hope for tommarow, I’m broke, soon to be homeless, no sex, no loves, and when I pass no-one will notice till my landlord checks my apartment because I haven’t paid my rent.
Well it’s time
goodbye
If I could just make some progress on my bills. I’m an homest man I never stiff anyone, but since I lost my job two years ago I’ve had to live on a small pension, (thank God for that) and I just slip farther behind. I’m 55. I’ll never be able to pay them off. I hide the hurt from everyone but sometimes it comes back so badly that it’s almost unbearable. I never, ever,  thought that at this stage of my life when I should be looking forward to my “golden years”, I’m instead living in a rented apartment, struggling to get by, with […]
That is how I feel. I can’t believe I’m actually at a site like this but it’s getting worse. I’ve long felt I was depressed (my entire life), but this is the first time I’ve actually called it quits. I love life and the experiences of living, I just hate my own life and would wish it upon nobody. I think the only reason why I haven’t succeeded in killing myself is because of one relative in my life.  I have to outlive them. But once they go, my expiration will be soon after. Probably the same day.
There is absolutely nothing wrong in my life with the […]
I’m a twenty year old in college… and there’s a lot that’s happened in the past few years that has made me question life in its entirety. Prior to my senior year in high school, my father was diagnosed with lung and esophagus cancer. It was a difficult struggle to see the dramatic changes my life took in terms of my family, friends, and my responsibilities. I took it upon myself to acquire a job and help with the family. I fought and struggled and did my best to help with the family in hopes that my father would get better. […]
My dad’s job makes us move around alot and i’ve finally had enough, I can’t take losing all my friends over and over again. I started cutting a while bck, after my grandad ahd died, and sme teachers noticed it and put me into counciling which helped for a while but then a teacher who was realli helping me deal with everythink, she wasn’t judging me or anythink like that but she seems to have forgotten about me and once again I’m left alone with no-oneto talk to no-one to lean on or nothink. I feel as if I’m invissible. My friends talk about me behind my […]
it’s evident because I am 30 years old and still live with my parents.. even though I am a female, that doesn’t make it any better… I have been diagnosed as bipolar 2 and I am on social security.. That makes me a complete and utter leech on life’s resources.. I hear the eugenecists want to kill me because I cost them money and am a useless eater and unfortunately, I can see where they are coming from… I once loved and lost because the guy realized what a loser I really am and he kicked me to the curb after using me for sex… […]
i have thought long and hard about the option and finally figured out a way to do it whilst not letting anyone know i killed myself, im going to get a job get my bike license buy a fast machine and go into the back of a truck as fucking fast as i can full fucking stop no one will know i killed myself it will just look like i was reckless and riding to fast well i hope this idea help those of you who are serious see you all on the flip side
My relationship with my partner of 12 years has failed. Â I gave up my family and my culture to be with him in another country. Â Somehow, I have managed to end up with no job, no career, no money and no prospects, with a 4 yearold and a 2 yearold in my care. Â I have struggled with depression and the care of 2 kids while hubby kept going with his fancy career and now he wants the kids. I have nothing to offer – there is no money or recognition in being the mother of my children. Â All the court wants to know is how […]
hey, folks!
if I’m missing some of the finer arts of ortogrphay and grammar, please don`t blame me. i`m no native speaker of english, but joining this forum from overseas.
my point is though, i don`t see any meaning in life. i am not religious, i am an atheist.
i lost my job now twice by the company going ruinous in between twelve months an had a junior-managemt-position both times; also, the search for new employers isn`t working out too well.
and then, to mention also, i`m not one to make a familiy…
so, to put the whole matter in a nutshell, as i was tought would be a good […]
When I registerd here I was seriously considering ending my life…I felt that I just could not go on anymore…my heart was broken, as well as my spirit. I had just finished crying my eyes out, and cursing God, why when he had the chance did he not take me…I had replayed are the hurtful things my husband has said to me over and over in my head…I also had just watch another amature video of him and his girlfriend post on the net…I watched and listened to all the things he said to her…and thats not the only one of them that he has […]
When i feel im doing something good with my life something happens that shoots me into the ground.Being the youngest of five most would think i would be the babyed one the spoiled little bastard that gets what ever i ask for.And where i have received the things i had wanted im told its just because im the baby one,not that i had done something good enough for a reward.Always being told that beauty is the only way you’ll make in the world is depressing when you find your self disgusting at times i will act as if im happy so i dont bring down […]
i posted here once before… but i did a really bad job of explaining… i basically told what has happened to me, but thats not really all that needs to be said….. its just frustrating when you want to die, you are hurting so much, and the people you turn to just start blaming themselves and apologizing…. its also really stressful when you have to help the two closest people in your life go through the exact same thing as you, and see them suffer like you do. i think i die a little bit inside whenever one of them begs me to let them […]
Today, I am full of angry thoughts. I just checked the gun. How surreal. It’s there. Several are in this house. Now, I need a bullet. 32mm. I find lots of 22 mm, but don’t think that gun is good enough. I’m crazy writing this. I know this is my thinking, my old thinking & thoughts that need to die. I am a follower of Byron Katie. She is a teacher of “loving what is” and this reality raises itself again & again. www.thework.org
I admit, I missed my medication for 2 days. I took it today and will probably be feeling normal soon. I’m so […]
I am 28 yrs old. I am your typical white guy. I am married to a beautiful women be she doesn’t live with me.   I use to own a business but with the economy I had to shut down. I have had a rough life I spent 9 yrs in stae and federal prison. I went in when I was 18. I came out reformed and ready to work. I met my wife who was my sisters best friend about 4 months after i was released. I started a moving business and did great with it. i was able to do more stuff with my life in […]
The every day has become so petty. It is such a struggle to put up the front of being “okay” with the way things are when it all seems, and often is, so meaningless. It takes courage to walk away from a job and security without a backup plan. How do I look at myself and decide what I can do that makes me feel good…maybe a long forgotten chidhood dream can be pursued. It seems easy to be surrounded by selfish and weak people and hard to find people supportive and caring.Â
Suicide is not easy; Although many people say that it is.  It […]
i dont know what to write, say or even think right now. all i know is that i am tired, not in the physical sense although it it exhausting to wake up every morning knowing it is going to be the same bull shit that i have been putting up with to long. medication hasnt helped, mostly because i cant afford to stay on it, hospitals dont work-twice now at least, and friends dont work because nobody wants to be bothered, which is why its called “pity party for one”. I AM DONE. i dont want the attention of fake people saying they care knowing […]
i know my issues aren’t worthy of suicide compared to others but i just got to let this out hehe… i guess this may not be really about my thoughts of suicide. though i sometimes feel like ending my own life just because of reading other people’s pain and sorrow…
grades don’t matter but why can’t my father see that. he’s always bringing me down. always telling me how brilliant he was in college. that i ought to be like him. but i’m not him and never will be. he always contradicts me on everything even when i was choosing which school to get into. i […]
I became actively suicidal and very BPD symptomatic this last year. I’ve never really dealt with any of the b.s. from my past and it all seemed to come crashing down around me last May.
I don’t know there was any one thing that caused me to break, so much as it was just one thing building on top of another. Â Now I have an issue with keeping my head above water. Â I’ve managed not to cut since March, but the suicidal thoughts still come. Â
It’s bizzare that I have become this person. Someone who doesn’t think much of herself, does not value life, is very […]