Took about 20 iron pills around 11:00pm yesterday from all the crap my parents put me through. I thought I would die in my sleep. Until I found out today I will die a slow death when I woke up today and researched it . I’m transitioning from stage one to 2 soon. It would take me about 3 days to die give or take if I’m not in a coma. Well it could take a week that I could die from an overdose. I told my mom after I woke up. She made me puke up everything several times after drinking loads of water. Though that […]
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Mom
Ever since my mom died when i was 14 i’ve been depressed. I was a momma’s girl, i slept in the bed with her till i was 12. Alot of things happened to me as a child. My father left when i was 3 and I was molested by a friend of the family when i was 8. I remember being really shy as a child and scared of everyone and everything. I was constantly teased by my older sisters for being so cringy and i’d cry. Then one friday morning, after fighting a long battle of breast cancer, my mother died in her bedroom. When she died noone even acknowledged my presence. […]
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have you been taken advantage of by every person youve met
have you been nice followed the rules and yet , still gotten in stupid trouble all of the time
have you been physically abused as a child on a daily basis but lied to afterwards
the police would come too often after you getten chased around your house, yet what a good family life my ass
abused mentally too , every day of your life,
was your father a drug addict, alcoholic and drug dealer?
Did you have no friends , and been alone in your head since you were young enough to crawl
I hate school like i can honestly say i do except for my math teacher she is amazing. I havent been going and my mom gets pissed at me for not going but she doesnt understand that i feel like one of the “out crowd” kids cause i am over weight and ive never actually got called fat well i have but its like in one of those “funny” ways well they think its funny and i just put a smile on my face and act like its nothing but it hurts really bad. Ive told my mom but she thinks its all bull […]
I grew up with a mentally ill mother. She had dissosociative personallity disorder – it isn’t well known, but you have heard of its first cousin, multiple personality disorder. As a result, my entire life was a crisis – living in a home where even the slightest mistake in your wording could send your mother into a suicidal tailspin made me learn to turn all my negative feelings on myself (as a child, hating myself was always far easier than being blamed for a dissosociative episode or a suicide attempt – and, yes, she did directly blame me for some). I’ve been trying, in my […]
i’m suicidal all the time. it’s always on my mind. i’ve only made one “serious” attempt that got me in the hospital, but i’m scared of asking people for help and i’ve made dozens of mini-attempts (that no one knows about) or put myself in risky situations countless times. i just wish i could die already. i’m scared of what comes after death (i’m agnostic, i don’t have a particular belief because i don’t know.) but i’m scared of what living will bring me as well..
my story is not particularly abnormal or interesting. rejected by a drug abusing father, raped at 18, kicked out of […]
hey all suicidal angels.. im calista.. well, im suicidal..it’s been awhile..ive tried it so many times but here I am, typing this up. How I wish im dead by now..i just dont wanna live but in some point,i feel i dont wanna commit suicide and pray to God that someone might stab me up or something..It can be anything,i just dont wanna live.
Since I was 5, my life really intense. Parents always want the best out of me, so I gave them all. I do so many things in life, Im always the best student in school and in college, i cook, i bake, i […]
Just this year on Jan 28 09 my mom passed away.
At first I couldnt beleive it. I was with her in the hospital and she was fine.
I go sit with my grandma and then next thing I hear is CODE BLUE!!
I didnt know what that meant but they sent the nurses to my mom room.
Minutes passed and the Dr came out saying ” Im sorry but her heart just gave out. ”
At that very moment my entire world collapsed!
A month pass after her death and I remembered something.
She would always give me a hug before I went to school.
I burst out in tears and reached […]
I’ve been depressed for as long as I can remember. I don’t really know why. I just don’t like to be alive. Nothing has ever happened to me, and I think for most of my life, it hasn’t been a horrible life. I just don’t like living it anymore. It’s getting harder to deal with.
I’m 28, separated from my husband for a year now and have an unplanned pregnancy with someone who I wish would die. I’m not that lucky though. I miss being with husband, I love him more than anything and would do anything for him. We have 2 beautiful girls. I wish […]
My life was perfectly fine until things started in the 5th grade. I was your normal self-centered, bratty, know-it-all, drama queen, annoying, 10-year-old, until my mom decided she was leaving my dad. That day broke my heart, and tears are now splattering on my keyboard just thinking about it. When she told me the news, an unnatural shriek escaped my mouth, and she was surprisingly laughing at me, though I was standing in a pile of tears. Later that day my dad attempted talking to me about it, but for the first time in my whole life he put his head in his hands and cried right […]
It all started on a friday afternoon. My mom had just picked me up from school and we were on our way to pick up my older siblings from their schools. Then i had noticed my mom was acting very peculiar. So i asked if everything was ok, and she replied no with a fake smile. i knew something was wrong but i just didnt know what. Once we picked up my older siblings i got ready for a girl scout troop meeting. My mom drove me to it and as soon as she had arrived back at my fathers house she told my […]
I’ve never been the type to ask for help. I am a very independent person, who likes to do everything on my own.
I cry out for help in my own way. But no one is lisenting. My brother usualy hears the crys but he’s been working a lot lately. My mom just seems to ignore them. She just seems to care more about her friends then her own daughter.
I know she can’t be stupid. I’m falling back into my same ruotine. I never eat. And when I do I get sick right after. I sleep A LOT. I don’t only sleep cuz I’m coming down […]
First of all, i’m beyond grateful for this site, it has seriously shown me how many people are going through the same stuff I am. Obviously you don’t have to read this, but, i need to write it. I may never go on this site again or check it, but i need to let my soul just spill. I grew up in a Christian home my whole life. My father was a missionary and my mother is/was a seriously strong christian. Recently, i’ve been going through serious depression. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I’ve just been a zombie. I’ll come home from school […]
So it all started in the fifth grade, My uncle had just died from cancer. I was sad of course. I started to wear alot of black. People of course did’nt care all they did was call me gothic and emo. My life was just so stupid, I didn’t know what to do at the age of 10, I had friends but why would I tell them anything? So I just became really isolated and just kept to myself, I thought this was just a new to live life, But then my mom was diagnosed with deppresion and Bipolar, Before that my parent’s split upp, […]
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