Tag:

someone

Wish I could record my experience so people knew what I went through

by blank-clutter 3/6/2016

written by blank-clutter

I wish it was possible to record the full experience that someone goes through in a day. I dont mean just recording the visual and auditory sound that they experience, but the emotions and the thoughts as well. All those impulses, all those triggers and feelings.

If I could show someone what it was like to be in my shoes, to fully be in my shoes, I feel like they would understand. They probably would be disgusted that they ever climbed to that level of existence and feel so glad that they dont live like that.

I know its going to be more and more possible in […]

3/6/2016 9 comments

by LetItGo 3/6/2016

written by LetItGo

when it happened i was yielding
waiting waiting waiting
for someone to come i didnt know it yet
i didnt realize i was waiting grasping on to each breath like it was going to be my last
it happened so gradually i never once closed my eyes and shouted the word no
people take that as acceptance as if its such a black and white matter it is gray space and static it is no opposite there is no box holding me in or leaving me out
my hurt is not romantic nor is it happy hurt it is not hurt that i cry […]

3/6/2016 1 comment

Attention!?

by Greenz 3/6/2016

written by Greenz

I feel like I’ve posted something like this before…So sorry for a potential duplication. Or…Whatever.

Anyway! A lot of times people will do “weird” things caused by depression, or other “disorders,” that can cause oddball behavior. Half the time – ok, I don’t have actual stats, so I’m basically pulling shit out of my ass – but a lot of the time, the behavior is just dismissed as someone “looking for attention.” This NEVER MADE ANY SENSE TO ME. Even on here, so many posts are about it: I did [behavior] to express that things aren’t ok, and it was just […]

3/6/2016 15 comments

Help…?

by GerbzBaby 3/6/2016

written by GerbzBaby

I don’t want to seem like that person who wants to seak attention when I rant or cry out for help on here. I always feel like that’s the case.. But can someone please try and convince me not to do something stupid.. At least by tomorrow..before I go to work…

3/6/2016 6 comments

Sometimes I wish someone would see me surfing on sp

by blank-clutter 3/5/2016

written by blank-clutter

And then maybe they would realize how bad my mental state has become and maybe they could help.

Unfortunately, due to my shitty personality (filled with ego and thinking I know what’s best) outside help hasn’t really helped me in the past.

It won’t matter if I end it all, it’s the best solution because that’s what I think :p

3/5/2016 3 comments

Mountains

by to much pain 3/5/2016

written by to much pain

I can’t wait to get in to the mountains. As much as I hate being alone and having no one, when I am in the mountains I am at peace. Just mother nature and I. When I go it is not a camping trip. I wouldn’t consider it a survival trip either but in a way it is a survival trip. I don’t take a tent or sleeping bag. I don’t take a gun. I take something to start a fire, a knife and a little fishing line. The rest I use mother nature to provide. I build a shelter, eat bugs and berries and […]

3/5/2016 11 comments

Keep walking

by to much pain 3/5/2016

written by to much pain

I am so tired of people continuously waking out of my life, only being there when it will make them feel better. I posted yesterday about the hell that I went through as far as being abused. It is the effects of the abuse that I have worked six hard years on getting past that keeps people walking out of my life like some kind of fucking revolving door.

I have worked so hard to get past every muscle in my body stiffing up and feel like I want to crawl out of my skin every time I am touched. Now days I can give someone […]

3/5/2016 17 comments

sorry…

by Alan Ominous 3/4/2016

written by Alan Ominous

I deleted the song fucking because….

Commence meltdown in 3…2…1

FUCK! I won’t kill myself… I fucking know it. So even mentioning it is a waste of perfectly good oxygen. I won’t fucking alter my life. I won’t ever accept reality. Just gonna sit here and wallow in self pity.

3/4/2016 6 comments

I’m Looking for Someone….

by iamsamijo 3/4/2016

written by iamsamijo

Awhile back, maybe too long back, I was receiving very supportive comments from someone by the username Noctis. They don’t have any posts on their profile, so I don’t know if they’ve posted comments recently or not. Has anyone seen this person/username around lately?
I’d like to hope they’re still around, but I’d also like to know if they’re not. If you know anything, please let me know.
Thank you.

And Noctis, if you’re out there, I hope you’re doing well, friend. I miss you.

3/4/2016 2 comments

countdown to June

by BlueEyes 3/4/2016

written by BlueEyes

Well, I’m still here. I guess that counts for something.

Sitting here watching the snow fall. I’ve got MC on my mind. I think he has today off from work and is home. I know he won’t call, and I won’t bother him. I’m supposed to be working myself.

What’s on my mind is his wedding. It’s on schedule for mid-June and last Sunday my girl friend told me about the elaborate wedding dress his fiancé bought. Considering MC never wanted to get married again after the trauma of his first disastrous marriage, I’m curious as to what his reaction will be when he sees it. I’m still […]

3/4/2016 4 comments

Everywhere I look there is a trigger

by blank-clutter 3/3/2016

written by blank-clutter

How can I go on when so many things that remind of all the negatives. My life is just a mess of associations of things I face to hurtful thoughts.

Just want this rough ride to be over. If someone is reading a book and even by a quarter in they arent enjoying it, wouldnt they just put it down?

3/3/2016 5 comments

I wish none of you were sad

by itsme-cammy 3/2/2016

written by itsme-cammy

At first, I had it all planned out. My mom was going out and I had like 3 full bottles of medication on hand. She never checks up on me, so I felt like I was in the clear. She came home early though, and my biggest regret was not locking the door. I remember waking up in a hospital, and having my mom by my side. Of course, they wouldn’t send me home, and sent me to a mental ward.

Now let me tell you, mental hospitals aren’t like they are in the movies. But….they’re pretty freaking […]

3/2/2016 5 comments

Post About Post

by GTSuicide_6 3/2/2016

written by GTSuicide_6

I hate doing this; making a post about a post,

but can somebody please out there read the most recent post I wrote, titled, “Help Myself.”

Please someone.

3/2/2016 0 comment

I’m so in love with her, it’s crazy.

by Wintergirl 3/2/2016

written by Wintergirl

There is someone in my life, who I have found myself to be in love with. I say it that way because it’s just that, one day it just hit me, hard. I have known her through my travels, on my way to work. I ride the bus. She’s everyone’s favorite. I know this because I ride a lot of busses in any given week. No other bus rides are like this. She’s such a kind, fun, kinda crazy person. She remembers things you say to her. I can’t imagine how many people she sees in a day, but yet she remembers you aren’t looking […]

3/2/2016 8 comments

No Friends, No Hope

by -M- 3/1/2016

written by -M-

I used to have many friends, all who would talk to me and lift me up through the deep/hard parts of life. But they keep walking away from me, as if I am not worth their time anymore. I do not blame them because I would walk away from me too if I could. I just wish I had more people in my life who actually cared about me and not themselves or their own person interests. For once, I want someone who will ask me how I am doing and keep talking to me even when I am down.

But the world is a cruel […]

3/1/2016 3 comments

idea

by Alan Ominous 3/1/2016

written by Alan Ominous

Is the a group like SP but for Homicide? Like a homicide project? If so we should have a mixer. Kill 1 bird with 2 stones. Or something like that. In other words, someone please blow my fucking brains out, please….

3/1/2016 4 comments

Nothing left

by jsjones 3/1/2016

written by jsjones

At 38 I feel like I have nothing worth living for, and I am just a ghost to everything and everyone around me. I grew up with an abusive father who my mother still is married to. I have been living in LA for 17 years trying to chase my dream of working in the film industry. My best friend killed himself back 2010 and left me in his will. I had money but I lost it al because I couldn’t find anyone to hire me. So I used my money to work on other people’s movies for free. I’ve had a boyfriend for three […]

3/1/2016 14 comments

All Lies

by Ylem 3/1/2016

written by Ylem

Everything about me is one big fat motherfucking LIE!

My smile…. Fake as Fuck.
My conversation with people… Lies
Conversation with my family… Lies

I’M DYING people! I’m really dying.

I secretly cry in my room, wipe away my tears and have supper with my family like nothing happened.

My frown immediately turns upside down if someone asks if I’m okay.

I’m tired. I’m tired of faking. I’m tired of crying in silence. I’m just tired of everything. I’m tired of life.

I don’t want to be here anymore. But I can’t go just yet. I keep saying this over and over again. I keep repeating myself over and over again. […]

3/1/2016 30 comments

Cannot keep going…

by grieving24 3/1/2016

written by grieving24

I literally don’t know what else to say except for “I just can’t do this anymore” I am divorced from a man who abused me to the point that I don’t even know who I am anymore. He is VERY wealthy and is currently in hiding in Denmark with my daughter whom he went against court order and kidnapped. She already had a passport signed by both of us because we traveled quite a bit for his work.

As of right now he cannot be found. I have run out of all my savings due to having to pay 2 lawyers, one here in the states, and […]

3/1/2016 4 comments

Update

by LostandLonelySoul 3/1/2016

written by LostandLonelySoul

My ex-fiance broke my heart. Yep. He broke off our engagement and continues to beat me emotionally until I’m numb. I want to die. I want someone to take this pain away from me. But nobody ever does. So I think I’ll end my pain. I think I’m going to die today. Don’t tell me life’s worth the fight. My whole life has been one painful experience after another. I can’t do this anymore. I’ve been crying out for help for years. I thought he was going to help me. He broke me in ways I never thought were possible. I will probably never be […]

3/1/2016 7 comments

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