Stories of Loss

For those who have passed on.

0

I got my answer yesterday

September 29th, 2016by disgusting

Spent my last $20 of the next to the last paycheck I’ll ever see in my life on food for him and then he got super pissed off at me because we got caught in the rain and got drenched, then I got on the bus while he was in the middle of playing his game but my back was killing me and there were homeless people camped out at the bus stop and wouldn’t let me sit down and I have a disability with my back and I can’t just stand all day because everyone else has a reason why they deserve the seat …

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4 hours ago • My Suicide Note, Stories of Loss

2

Day 5

September 16th, 2016by Nico The Robot

You said you’d never leave me.

You said you’d stay by my side forever.

You said you’d always hold me tight.

You said you’d go through anything with me.

You said you’d never let me go.

You said you’d never forget me.

You said you loved me.
You liar.

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2 weeks ago • General, Poetry & Art, Stories of Loss

11

Suicide Or Life

September 16th, 2016by dyinglostgirl

i want to die, but im scared to.
everything in my life is crashing and i cant take it anymore, i know my research
and for now i choose death
im broken and feel like im fading away and no one cares or realizes

im 17 ive gone down a broken road with 3 reasons to live

1.) fear of pain

2.) fear what happens next, to everyone effected

3.) fear of not successfully commiting

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2 weeks ago • General, Stories of Hope, Stories of Loss

5

My Crappy Story

September 7th, 2016by ilikepie

I have a feeling that no one will read this but I need to be able to talk to someone. When I was about 3 my dad went away to jail, so my mom remarried and I had a stepdad. I had already been exposed to sex, because my mom had gotten raped a lot at the time. So my stepdad raped me beat me, and today I’m really messed up because of that. My mom and stepdad told me to shop lift, made me look at pornography and I hated it. Today I wake up afraid that my stepdad will find me and kill …

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3 weeks ago • Stories of Loss

6

I Feel So Alone…..

September 4th, 2016by sh0tgun_

My Boyfriend Recently Broke Up With Me Because His Parents Forced Him To. I Try To Talk To My Friends On XboxLIVE. But I Still Have Xbox360. They Have XboxOne… They Mean So Much To Me. We Were Actually Planning On Living Together Along With My Boyfriend. Yeah I Met Them Online Gaming… But I Met My BF In Person.. Best Day Ever. My Other Friend Not Yet But Soon.
Now…….. I Feel Like Everything’s Falling Apart. And I Don’t Know What To Do Or Who To Turn To… I Used To Be A Cutter… But I Stopped For My Friends. Because I Know They Would …

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4 weeks ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, Stories of Loss

1

Do I Deserve To Be Angry…?

September 4th, 2016by GerbzBaby

Every time me and my friend meet up to talk after work someone he knows shows up. He leaves me, whether I’m right beside him, in his car, etc. He doesn’t come back until the ones working decide they need to go fearing they’d get introuble. I can’t talk to his friends. They give me an odd vibe, I’ve tried to talk with them but they don’t seem to like me. I’m an idiot when I talk so now I just shut myself up.

He comes back and apologizes, “are you mad at me because I left you?” Of fucking course I am.. But I didn’t …

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4 weeks ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, Rants, Stories of Loss

2

On my mind

August 29th, 2016by SoulNumber83

The reason I’m here is from the mindless browsing that I randomly find myself doing at the oddest of times. In just a few minutes I can feel the trembling hands the shaking voices the ones who just can’t cry anymore or are still shedding these tears. Its depressing to see many of us in despair but I find some kind of solace knowing I’m not alone on the bridge.

I’m 21 years old and for this past year I feel like I’ve been sitting on a bench in purgatory for the longest. In this year my losses are not even comparable to most people but …

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1 month ago • General, Rants, Stories of Loss

4

I Thought I Was Better, But I Actually Got Worse

August 28th, 2016by GerbzBaby

I can’t keep going on like this. I feel so unappreciated. I feel so lonely. I need help but no one doesn’t want to take time out of their day to help me.. All they do is worry about themselves. They care little for those like me who are suffering.. I thought I was getting better when in all actuality I’m just getting worse. I’m so sleep deprived. Working just makes everything worse. As I’m sitting here on my break all I can think about is suicide. I feel that will be the only way to release me from my suffering. I can’t

…

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1 month ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, My Suicide Note, Rants, Stories of Loss

7

Why do I think about this all the time still?

August 27th, 2016by Shootmeup

I once had a shirt that said “if you’re looking for a sign not to commit suicide this is it” and it honestly made me really happy to have.  It cheered me up a lot, some how making me feel better about life. But it was stolen from me and it crushed me and made me really sad and depressed. Pathetic huh?

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1 month ago • General, Rants, Stories of Loss

3

I’m always being compared to my sister/ being left out

August 24th, 2016by GerbzBaby

In my family I’m the oldest of my two sisters (we are going to call them:) C and A. C being the first at 17 and A being the second youngest at 15. Me being of the age of 18 you’d think I wouldn’t be compared to my little sister (in this case my sister C)… But I am… A lot! I’m never just “Amanda” I’m just “C’s sister”.

“Oh! You are very shy compared to C.” “Your nothing like C is!” “You don’t look like C or A at all!” “You and C have nothing in comman.” These are just the few I can think …

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1 month ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, I Will Survive, Rants, Stories of Loss, Suicidal Survivors

23

It Hurts

August 22nd, 2016by Justnoonemuch

It hurts. Iv delt with it for a long time. Not always for the best. I OD on a couple hundred asprin a few years back. I woke up feeling like i would have a heart attack. If i moved a single muscle, arm, leg, neck, i would throw up. My body did not want to die. After hours of convulsing in my bed i became terrified. I did not want to die. But i did. I was torn between my bodies terror and my minds willingness to go. I met a girl. I told her everything. She was my other half. My only friend, …

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1 month ago • Chronic Pain, General, Stories of Loss

4

Why.

August 20th, 2016by mememachine

If this ever crops up on my social media I’m sorry. It means that I’ve truly become nothing but a failure, that I’ve totally failed to keep myself alive for another day.

I’m sorry. I shouldn’t do this. My life isn’t terrible, it never really was. Compared to the thousands of suffering humans who drag themselves awake each day and somehow smile all the while, my life is great. I just,  can’t anymore. I can’t seek help, it’s too late, I failed. I couldn’t help myself, so who could.

My life started out great, my mother was a well earning nurse, I had friends, a dog, and …

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1 month ago • Family & Friends Effects, My Suicide Note, Stories of Loss

1

Malaise

August 20th, 2016by anothernoone

First time posting here.

I’ve been, I guess you could say “actively suicidal” in the past.  Perhaps not currently.  But, on some level, I’m always thinking about it.

I feel tired.  old.  most of all, worthless.

I’m not who I set out to be.  I was reading someone else’s post on here about how it could take just one big thing to fuck up your life forever.  and yeah.  but, breaking it down, it’s probably not one thing or one event, but a whole series of things over a whole series of years.  or you hit so many setbacks, fallen off the proverbial horse so many times, you …

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1 month ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, Rants, Stories of Loss, Suicidal Survivors

2

Scared to Live, Not to Die

August 19th, 2016by FlaminJoy

Ever since I was a little girl, living was an issue. I’ve wanted to die since I was 8 yrs old. My mother was/is evil and doesn’t have feelings like most people do. Common traits of a Sociopath; she would have a lot of sex with a lot of people just so she could feel something… Or at least I tell myself that’s the reason why. She married my dad while she was still married and had 2 sons with someone else. My dad didn’t know, but her first husband soon found out and divorced her. My dad in turn raised my two older brothers …

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1 month ago • Chronic Pain, General, I Will Survive, My Suicide Note, Stories of Hope, Stories of Loss, Suicidal Survivors

5

I held on…

August 17th, 2016by whenallthestarsfall

I held on…through everything over the last year……I held on…being turned inside out….  I held on… giving it one last try as I hung on to nothing….I held on…while grasping for anything as I fell through nothing but open space….  I held on…as time keeps marching on, as it forgets me in it’s wake….

I held on…..because I know what it is like to be alone….I held on…. because I know what it’s like to have people turn their back on you…  I held on…. as I cried alone…. I held on as my heart finished breaking as I held my infant son one last time….I

…

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1 month ago • Chronic Pain, Family & Friends Effects, General, Poetry & Art, Stories of Loss

6

Why they don’t notice it?

August 17th, 2016by closedworld

I hate it. I fucking hate it how everybody act like everything is just peachy!!! Everything is like fucking nightmare.  They don’t notice it. They don’t notice how I am not eating my food. How I am dying. They don’t notice that the smile that I show is fake. Even my parents don’t notice that I am  just acting like everything is perfect. I mean they are my parents right? They should know when I am lying  they should know when I am putting act.

But they don’t. They don’t notice that I am acting.  Every night when I go to my bed I don’t sleep. …

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1 month ago • Chronic Pain, Family & Friends Effects, General, Stories of Loss

8

I must die

August 16th, 2016by Nowhere88

I met someone on the Internet. I got depression, and she was so kind and perfect to me. She understood me like no one else. She loved me like no one else has ever done.
We loved the same hobbies. We loved the talking. We loved each other so much.

But she had BP (Borderline Personality). And we talked for months and she wouldn’t get too close.
She had this constant feeling that I would abandon her. She said she trusted me, but only had to go slow… because those are the feelings she said she always had about everyone. That people will end up disapointing her, and …

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1 month ago • Chronic Pain, My Suicide Note, Stories of Loss

2

Unfair Situation

August 11th, 2016by GerbzBaby

So today me and my friend were supposed to hang out.. But we didn’t because the time, the place everything was messed up. I got very upset because it seemed like he didn’t care at all.. And I was really hoping to since home sucks (it also seemed like he didn’t want to hang out because we weren’t going to hang out at my house) and I lost a good friend (my Therpaist whom didn’t die! She just moved buildings and I wasn’t able to go with her to continue seeing her)..So I just ignored my friends snaps. It helped to calm me down somewhat. …

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2 months ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, Rants, Stories of Loss

3

There is nothing more for me, need the end to set me free. Trapped in myself, body my holding cell.

August 10th, 2016by .fadetoblack.

I met you in my junior year of high school. its been almost 7 years since then, and exactly one month now since I last saw you. From the moment we met I knew there was something special in you, it didn’t take me more than a week to confess my love to you. From the very start I knew you were the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, you were just different than everyone else. Even after you moved away for school, I was always there when you needed me. I was in a dark place when you moved …

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2 months ago • Chronic Pain, Coping Skills, Family & Friends Effects, I Will Survive, Stories of Hope, Stories of Loss, Suicidal Survivors

6

I can’t grasp reality…help

August 10th, 2016by nonexistingsoul

I have this feeling that everything that I’m seeing is not real. It’s like everything is just an imagination, like it’s only in my head. It’s like I can’t see what’s true or what’s not anymore. I’m losing contact with reality. can someone answer this. I don’t know why I’m feeling like this. It’s making me go crazy. It’s killing me inside

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2 months ago • Chronic Pain, Stories of Loss

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