Stories of Loss

For those who have passed on.

3

April 24th 2016

May 30th, 2016by hdd7474

April 24th 2016.

 

The gut wrenching day that I lost my Mom. My never doubtful amazing support system. My rock. My role model growing up.

She’s gone.

I wonder how long I’m going to continue to wake up everyday hoping it was a nightmare, and didn’t really happen? Everyday that I wake up and realize that this is my new reality… I feel like I’m being told for the first time again that she’s gone. I’ve gone through a rollercoaster of intense motions the last month or so. I’ve gone from shocked, to being extremely upset, to being angry to being extremely confused.

I …

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5

Confessions of a Dead Angel

May 29th, 2016by Mexicanwhiteboy96

Hey everyone, just me- Im 19 right now and I really hate my life . I see people complaining back and forth about trivial things and the truth is I always believed they didn’t know what true pain was. But I know it isn’t right or fair because I’m just comparing their pain to mine andy oroblems aren’t anyone elses. I was molested by my cousin when I was about 8 in 4th grade. the earliest time I can honestly remember this, I was experimented on and I was penetrated my older cousin. Both my cousins fondled me though. That may not …

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0

I want to forget everything

May 29th, 2016by Deadinside59

I want to forget this house and these people i want to forget the life im leading i know if i continue on this path it’ll lead me straight to the darkness within myself that im so afraid of i move in just a few short weeks i haven’t continued with packing or clearing my room despite my needing to I’m honestly afraid this won’t change anything i need something I’m being torn apart by the two people who tried to raise me my father who beat me and tried so hard to forge me into someone with no feelings no emotions no regret he …

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4

Am I broken?

May 26th, 2016by GreenGirl498

Perhaps I’ve been suicidal since I was seven years old, which was ten years ago. I guess the bullying of my friends and peers were the start of it. I saw everyone having at least four friends as I played by myself, I was never the one that anyone thought was fun or cool. I was the freak with the buck teeth.

I was also diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome at that time. I often was in my imagination, being friends with imaginary friends until I was fourteen.

There was only one friend that I knew, and she went to a different school, but each summer, we would …

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1

Forensic Cleaning Documentary – An Antagonizing Source for Strength

  I like this documentary very much. Not in a morbid way. But in the way that where it becomes evident that there isn’t anything pretty about death, the main character in the documentary finds strength and positivism from her job: Forensic Cleaning, aka. Crime Scene Cleaning, aka. Bio-hazard Cleaning Specialists, etc. She has gone […]

6

I don’t want to live anymore

May 25th, 2016by skysie

I guess I should start from the beginning. I am 17 almost 18 and have a brother who is 16 and a sister who is 20. My life sucks is complicated and somewhat confusing at times.

I was adopted when I was 4 by a family who we were all happy to be part of. I was adopted because my parents did drugs and were nearly always unconscious. We were malnourished and my sister was looking after us. So I guess the positive was we got a new family and well that’s where things were supposed to get better but in fact things somehow got worse.

My brother …

4

A mommy’s end

May 24th, 2016by cmm73114

I lost my only child to “sudden unexpected infant death” at 9 months old. I fed her a bottle, laid with her till she fell asleep, laid her in her crib and then found her an hour later blue, cold and unresponsive. My husband did CPR until EMS arrived. They worked on her for over an hour and never could bring her back. My life ended that day. I’m simply an empty shell wandering around trying to be what doctors percieve as “normal/healthy”, considering. The only reason I’m still here is because I can’t bring myself to inflict this pain on my own mother. I …

3

hated bullied and exiled.

May 23rd, 2016by onewhoforgives

I’m not one to think of suicide when something bad happens in my life, but everyone at my school has drove me to that thought. I’ve always been bullied and been last or never picked cause of what people would say about me and how I’d be treated like someone’s little bitch.. but it’s was always my nature to fucking forgive them and shit. I started to contemplate of ways to do suicide and actually think of myself never being there in people’s lives anymore and who’d about who would attend my funeral, but that was what drove me to not doing it ,because I …

1

Stay Out Of My Memories

May 22nd, 2016by GerbzBaby

This is a continuation of my last post. It’s a bit of an update. Ok, so.. I deleted him off my social media account (snapchat). I specifically added him so we can talk about this situation.. Which.. We didn’t. It really opened my eyes and showed me he doesn’t care about how I felt in the situation at all as well as that he uses me only when no one else is there for him. So I came to the conclusion that if, and only if he talks to me I will tell him how I feel about him (it won’t be pretty, but I’ll …

3

Reality is boring , real life is boring , real world is boring , not like movies, comics, novels, anime manga, video games !

May 22nd, 2016by niki

Reality is boring
real-life is boring
real-world is boring
not like movies, comics, novels, anime manga, video games !

also,
I hate Humans , Humans suck
I hate Human , Human suck
I hate Humanity, Humanity suck
I hate people , people suck

Most humans / people only think about Money ,
and this reality is boring !
reallife is boring !
realworld is boring !

people / humans are so shallow, superficial, stupid, ignorant
Humanity is hopeless

if there is God , then God is boring !
even Science is boring too !
Science fiction (Sci-fi) is much more interesting than real Science facts !

why we can’t live in movie / …

10

Wish i was dead. No joy left…

May 22nd, 2016by johnwhogivesashit

Its been a while since ive been on here. I was feeling more positive for a while then it all went to shit. There is something really wrong with me. I subatage my life on purpose. Maybe im looking for rock bottom. Since the last time i posted i took a little trip back to jail. My dad likes to call it summer camp in polite conversation. Lol. I was fighting a serious charge for class x home invasion in illinois which gives you 6-30 years in jail. Last time i couldn’t tell the truth. Not when what i wanted to say could have been …

3

Pain and Pleasure (a quick true story of a kid who fucks with the minds of depressed girls…)

May 22nd, 2016by emotional.monster

So I am a senior male in high school. I’m 17 going on 18 at the end of June. There’s this one kid Zack who is a freshman at my school and I fucking hate him. I haven’t really talked to him but knowing what he does makes me sick. He dates a girl and makes out with her and everything, he is all sweet and charming and everything (little does anybody know he’s really a bitch and extremely aggressive and violent with guys) but the catch about the girls he dates is that they all self-harm (usually cutting). Sounds like a sweet boy right? …

0

This year

May 21st, 2016by IzzyThePsycho

I wrote this poem for a friend.

 

This year:

 

I look back at the past two years.

I sigh, and remember all the good times we’ve had.

Both years were great, but this year was different.

This is the year when you’re going to leave.

This is the year when you’ve faded. This year,

You’ve been more distant from me. I’ve been pretty

selfish. I should feel lucky just to have had any time knowing you. I let myself get too close, I cared too much, and

I’ll pay the price for it. This is …

12

Remembering, and…

May 21st, 2016by Cordless

It’s late enough that probably everyone has gone to sleep or is out partying in that fuzzy world where beer helps us forget everything else.

But I’ll just post this anyway, to help myself think.

About 3 months ago, I posted THIS about a guy in our symphony who died.  (Possibly/probably suicide).

His memorial service was last Thursday (they kept him on ice an extra long time because they had to wait for his brother to get home from overseas).

Since he was an excellent trumpet player, I’ve been trying to think of a way to pay tribute to that by composing a piece …

8

The Truth of Life After Suicide

May 18th, 2016by HERE4UOK

To Airrie. To IamABuilding. To vho. To Soco. To Iwantpeace2.
To joeld. To AnnieBear. To Raven. To Fantajin. To Nathaniel_Morisawa.
To into_the_sky. To rivets. To butterfly1123. To whiskered-fish. To those I missed.
To ALL of you.

I urge you to watch this documentary. No, I am not here to “save” you.
I don’t come here with false promises or magic potions. All I have is me.
I am HERE4UOK.

I just want you to be more aware, more informed, to feel encouraged a little. Maybe. For a moment even. In a positive way.
Don’t let the tunnel vision of entrapment, the wall of people and circumstances around you, block your view of what’s …

5

Wait to be Picked…

May 17th, 2016by HERE4UOK

…Don’t cut your stem prematurely.

Please.

HERE4UOK
suesyd . nomore at gmail . co m

PickingFlowers001

2

Death Day Log 2

May 13th, 2016by killswitchon

Ground zero. My optics aren’t good. Police looking for me. Now it’s do or die. Do to die. No backing out now. Only matter of time til there on city wide manhunt. Fuck. I needed one more reason.

20H41

4

Death Day Log 1

May 13th, 2016by killswitchon

Friday the Thirteenth
A good day to die. I’m ready. I know everything is too far gone. I know this moment has been the fate I’ve been delaying
for eight long years stuck in this disconnect. Once you lose your personality, soul and mind there’s truly nothing left.
It’s a solid three second drop into some broken concrete and rocks. Probably around 60 feet up. Need a running start — fly
like an eagle type thing. I just want to start a new life. Reincarnate. Jumping into a bed of concrete is a gnarly way to
go but I figure it’s the only way to feel proud about my death. …

1

Turning Into An Idiot

May 12th, 2016by GerbzBaby

Title says all. I’m becoming an idiot… My minds always in a blur to the point of forgetting. I’ve forgotten words, memories and plenty of other things like how to communicate with others. When I try to act smart I always turn out dumb, my friends make sure of it. They make me feel as though I’m an embarrassment. A shame. Not to long ago I had a hard time understanding the tv show I was watching. It took me a whole 10 seconds to process what they had said as well as what was going on. I don’t know what’s going on with me. …

1

I Hate You

May 10th, 2016by CaptainMarvelous

How dare you do this to me. If you wanted to die you should’ve done so by yourself, alone so you wouldn’t hurt anyone. Instead you fell in love with me, and made me fall in love with you.

You knew how badly I was hurt before. You knew I’d been abused, lost people, had people walk out on me or abandon me. You knew I was plagued by demons from my past. I thought I could trust you. You, of all people.

I can’t do anything without thinking of you. You’ve blighted my life with your loss. I just want to end things myself now. What …