General

For general topics related to the site.

1

life…ha!

  June 19th, 2010 by candicejones1992

Life…ha! I genuinley just have no interest in anything, ever. I dont feel emotions except sadness and anger.

I recently quit my job due to daily breakdowns, the phone would ring and i would cry? Someone would ask me how my day has been and i would breakdwn into a pathetic mess… Why i wonder? and now, i dont get out of bed untill late afternoon. I have no desire for anything, i dont want anything from life. I have withdrawn myself from all of my friends and family, i dont talk to anyone anymore. Ive stopped eating, just living off of coffee and cigarettes with an occasional bite of something just to keep …

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1

Still here, losing patience with myself…

  June 18th, 2010 by z

So I am a couple of weeks out, perhaps several, from getting on xanax for social anxiety and (mild) panic disorder.  I have got to the point where I am severely depressed about my situation and my inability to connect with people.  I’m just too shy, I guess.  So a friend of mine told me about xanax and how it is the greatest thing since sliced pudding.  So I am going to give it a try.  But I have no health insurance, so the soonest I can get some will probably be August.  But I don’t know if I can wait that long.  I try …

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4

Downhill

  June 18th, 2010 by Big S

5 Years I’ve been depressed.
Alot of people say It’s not important who they are but I want to share who I am, My name is Salem, I’m 16 years old, I’m 6 ft 2.
So 5 years depressed now, my family is slowly falling apart my mother has a mental dissorder, my father married another woman while married to my mother and had another son and doesnt give a shit about me. tests are here I can’t study this language because I don’t understand what the hell it says. for about 3 months now every night I take a knife from the kitchen and think about …

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0

thanatophobia – the fear of death

  June 18th, 2010 by careex

thanatophobia is the only thing holding me back. thanatophobia is the reason i’m still alive. thanatophobia is why no one has seen my suicide letter. one day, i will overcome my thanatophobia. one day, i will take my own life.

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3

  June 18th, 2010 by tedkramer7

I’ve lost everything. I’ve been alone for over 10 years. My life is spent fantasizing about how I wish my life would have been. Sometimes I fantasize about suicide. I tried to sit in the garage with the car running a few years back but kept seeing my parents and niece and nephew and sister in my head. So I would get out of the car and go lay on the couch. I dont see them much anyways, they all have their own lives. I just spend my life here alone with my dogs playing on the computer and …

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14

so sad yet still here

  June 17th, 2010 by andrewk5

I dont know where to go anymore it seems as if my life is coming down around me , my name is andrew and i would like to chat with anyone going through a very hard time iam 25 and like i said things are bad

4076835883

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13

Nothing really matters.

  June 17th, 2010 by en_causa_sui

My name doesn’t even matter. I’m 20 and transgender. I’m a nihilist and up until now, I’ve been content with making my own meaning for life.

I have Borderline/Schizotypal/Paranoid Personality Disorder comorbid with nosocomephobia (an intense fear of hospitals.) I’m impressed that I’ve made it this far in life. I never expected to.

Last year I dropped out of college because of an injury that made it difficult to go to classes on top of a debilitating depression and severe suicidal thoughts. I thought things were going to get better.

I live with my dad and his new wife. I have no job. If my friends knew the …

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7

Just ready

  June 17th, 2010 by needabreak

You know when I think suicidal I don’t think calm. Maybe it is too many movies Idk. All I know is that I am tired, soul tired. It isn’t a screaming crying I wanna die kind of thing. It is simply ..I’m tired, I can’t do this anymore. It is hard keeping up the front of being happy. I am too old for all this (I am 35) being a single mom, trying to make ends meet, and pretend that it is easy. Those who see me struggle think I have everything under control so they don’t help. Even when I reach out to …

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2

why bother

  June 17th, 2010 by lost_soul

love is a drug. Feel it once and you’re hooked. I wish I never knew what it was like to be in love. I’m better off just ending life here at peace with the fact that I’ll never find another who will love me, than wasting my life chasing after a lost cause.

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7

It’s Not That Simple

  June 16th, 2010 by Violet Blake

My father thinks I’m insane.

Well, insane isn’t actually the word he used, it was “possessed”.

Funny, right? I mean what does he think, that the devil is the one whose making me depressed? It’s not like my head has spun all the way around yet, at least not that I’m aware of.

He just doesn’t understand, he think’sI can just be happy, that all I have to do is not be said anymore. Well, I have news for him.

IT’S NOT THAT SIMPLE.

I wish I could just be happy, but I can’t. I’ve spent so much time seeing myself as worthless, and he only contributed to that when …

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7

I gave all I could, but it left me so sore

  June 16th, 2010 by janna

Hi my name is johanna and I’m 18 years old I’ve been struggling with depression for almost 6 years now. The depression is getting worse. I cut myself more every day. I haven’t eaten a proper meal since I don’t know when, I’m lucky if I get 4 hours of sleep at night. I don’t know if I can take this any longer. I think about ending my life every hour, every day. Every single moment feels like torture. I don’t remember what it’s like to be happy, “normal” All I want is someone to say that I matter, that I’m important. I just need …

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0

My Own Loss To All

  June 16th, 2010 by writer_man2006

I know there are billions of stories walking around, some of them will vanish, others will be known. But, I do not feel as if my story is any different from anyone else’s. I am 23 years old and I live in a small, riverboat town in southern Illinois. I have struggled with anxiety and manic depression since I was 14 years old. What started the horror, the feelings, the thoughts is certainly unknown to me. But, I do know that life can be wonderful. It can do things to you that drugs cannot do. Yes, I do believe my life has been taken from …

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2

Tired

  June 16th, 2010 by Kina

I am tired of feeling so worthless and being such a burden to my friends and family. I wish it would all end, but my dad hises the guns and the ammo. I am so at a lost right now that i am just spending countless days in my room contemplating when i can end this. My family guilt trips me at every corneer and i feel like i am not ever gonna be good enough for them. i have started cutting again and the cuts are getting deeper and few in between. I am tired of being me.

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2

I wish I was gone

  June 16th, 2010 by skilift8

I wish I was gone, but in reality, I cant be gone.  I am a father with a wife and two kids.  We spend more a month than we make.  I am so down, I cant do anything.  I am stuck, lifeless.  I accidentally, got this love sickness for another woman.  Well, I was in the wrong place and fell down a slippery slope.  I did not expect this to happen.  I thought I could control it.  I did not expect love madness to set in.  (A romantic would call it madly in love)  She used me for three years, and then disappeared.  I am …

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0

things r geting a lil better…..

  June 16th, 2010 by brokenanscared

well my bf that i hav now is ubber nice n sweet n careing to me, hes actually turned me round a lil n has gotten me thinking if i really do wanna die, he makes me so happy i never stop smileing wen im round him, hes the best he allways knos wen sumthings wrong or bugging me n knos how to cheer me up to, i really care bout him a lot i hope things work out him, if they don id prob b in worse shape then ive ever been

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2

Is this it?!

  June 16th, 2010 by Daniel21

Hi, my name is Daniel. Im 15 years old and have suffered from depression for 7 years. I have also suffered from hallucinations, and bipolar. I hate myself more than anything have started cutting again. I am also slowly becoming  suicidal again. I held of on killing myself a few months back because i had a little bit of hope that i could get better. Shortly after that i got on meds. The meds didnt do shit for me for a few months, instead all of the worst side effects took place, such as having my neck spasm until it almost broke and vision problems. …

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1

school

  June 15th, 2010 by unknown227

school is a fucking joke, at school i only hangout with about 3 people and they dont even seem to like me at all so i find it hard to call them friends, they always just rip on me and dont include me and shit, it pisses me off, and the sad thing is i wouldnt give a fuck too if i had others i can hangout with but i DONT. im just sayin this now cus school is almost done and i want to change for next year, im not going threw another year of that. does anyone kno how i can change myself? …

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2

Do you agree?

  June 15th, 2010 by Hollow

Does anyone feel like the most compassionate and kindest thing anyone could do is press a button that would instantly kill yourself and everyone else? If I were given that option, I would do it.

So many people live completely shit lives, and many would rather they hadn’t been born. Many only live due to a survival instinct we are born with. If everyone died instantly, there would be no more pain, no more suffering, no more hardship. Some might say “But there wouldn’t be any happiness, joy, or pleasure either!” However, it is an asymmetrical situation. If you are alive you can wish that you were

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4

Back Doors

  June 15th, 2010 by Violet Blake

I’m officially in love with small towns.

I’ve been visiting my father awhile and nothings really changed, he’s still never home to hang out with me or even try to get to know me again, but that’s not realy a surprise.

Since my father isn’t around much, I’ve been spending a lot of time just getting to know this new town I’ve never even heard of and let me tell you something: It’s amazing.

In this small town, everyone is happy, which is weird, because lots of the people here barely have enough food in their houses to feed their families, but still they feel like the luckiest …

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0

In my heart I begged her not to go….

  June 15th, 2010 by Vincent

A story of a man losing what meant most to him.

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