General

Is there anyone in their forties out there ? I accept that depression is depression and is so irrespective of age; the quality of the thing, the despair, does not seem to me now to be any different from that ten, twenty, twenty five years ago. Where has all that time gone ?

i found this site in someones post on sixbillionsecrets.com i was getting tired of trying really hard to get my story out there, only to be shot down by others. Who’s idea was it anyway to make someone you don’t even know decide whether your personal daemons are worth being posted or not? it all hurts the same no matter what other people think about it or not! i decided it would be a good idea to check this site out, because i’ve recently been seeing someone, who is having serious issues with their ex, and its killing me. I would give anyhting for him […]

you know those days when it feels like you’d be better off dead? im still having them. i may hopefully move. then i can start over. i want to hang out with people who dont treat me different. its so stupid that nobody can see how they treat me. im always looked at like im the bad kid or i get looked at like im so happy and innocent. im not bad, but im not innocent. im nothing. just a random piece of flesh and bone that accidentally showed up on the face of this earth. thats all i’ll ever be.

At what point in life does one just give up ? I’m 45, have suffered from depression for over two and a half decades. It has ruined my life. I say ‘it’ though I mean myself. I use it as an excuse, a plea and as a way of life. I want to sleep, I want to die. I know it’s selfish but one needs a better reason to go on. I’ve so completely ruined my life, can’t sleep, can’t eat, can’t function. I am today a frighted child. I want to be rescued, I sort of expect to be rescued, I don’t take responsibility. […]

It put it in perspective how pointless if futile how my life will turn out, I’d rather not go into the details.

I am ready: I have nothing left to live for, I’ve gathered the supplies, I have the lack of steam to carry on. I know I have posted saying this multiple times before, but I fear this will be my last. My mind is set.

To everyone here, to everyone I have inconvenienced, to anyone that will remember me… I am sorry. My days have come to an end.

Well, I just found this site, and I have to say it’s been uplifting to finally find people who not only understand, but are going through what I’m going through. I suppose I should probably start by introducing myself and my problems. Throughout my life I’ve been told I need to be the best, need to be perfect. My inability to do so has driven my parents to give me grief and constantly put me down. I was never good enough, never worth their time. My siblings were better than me at everything in every way, and they tell me so repeatedly. I was […]

For weeks now I have made plans to take my life into my own hands.
Although only 15, Today I plan to end it.
I changed my mind so many times on how to die (jump off cliff, stabbing,etc…) and now I know what to do. Unfortunately due to a snow storm, I have to commit the act today at school instead of Friday. I am not scared, I’m rather at peace with myself. I’m sorry to those who tried to help me, but like I keep telling myself: Do what you have to do, no matter the consequences. In this case, I must die. […]

Today was the day of days for me. I woke up this morning ready to end my life.
I had gotten the exit kit and everything.

Only to have one missing piece for the damn thing to work.

What happens? I end up locking my keys in the car.

So I had to take two buses, and walk all the way home to find that my copy of my car key went missing.

I had to go to a thrift shop, buy an article of clothing that still had the old-fashioned metal hangers and go all the way back to my car.

During this time, I started to ponder not […]

so im 14 years old and im trying to die… any easy painless ways i can go about doing this anything please help me

Ok, so Matt, my shrink had said about going to my family doctor to have my headaches checked out but I don’t want to go back to my doctor… the gown and him walking in without knocking incident. So he had recommended a friend of his. Matt’s recommendation is about the only one I would trust… because of the carpal tunnel doctor. (Both of which I mentioned in “Hey Guys … I missed you!”) So I had called this new practice Thursday and gave the receptionist all my information, which wasn’t easy since she didn’t speak English very well.
I made sure I told her […]

Health class was terrible today! I had to sit and listen to my teacher talk about suicide for 47 minutes. It took all I had not to burst into tears. I think I might be a little bit bipolar. I can go from being happy and feeling nice one minute and the next be very depressed and suicidal for no reason at all. Or be very optimistic and then be pessimistic. I can go from being confident about myself to really hating myself, mostly I hate myself though. i’ve thought about talking to this one teacher i really like because he’s bipolar but im fairly certain […]

Her name is amber
She has eyes like her mother
She’s beautiful and bright the whole worlds in front of her
She has a smile that could end a war
Yet no one wants her and she has nothing to care for
Shes only 14 and she thinks
Why is the weight of the world crashing down on me
Cause as of late the sun doesn’t seem to shine so bright
And the place where my heart once was has lost its fight

She’s on her own
And as she’s braves her storm
All alone

She screams oh
I’ve had enough please make this go
This sea […]

All day
Staring at the ceiling
Making friends with shadows on my wall
All night
Hearing voices telling me
That I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good for something

Hold on
I’m feeling like I’m headed for a
Breakdown
I don’t know why

I’m not crazy, I’m just a little unwell
I know, right now you can’t tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you’ll see
A different side of me
I’m not crazy, I’m just a little impaired
I know, right now you don’t care
But soon enough you’re gonna think of me
And how I used to be

Me
Talking to myself in […]

I am thirteen years old, made fun of constantly. A little while back about a year ago I met a boy from a town close by at a local theme park. One day we were texting, he was with his friend Joey. Me and Joey started talking for a while’ added eachother on Facebook and became close. We have been talking for quite some time now. About a while back he asked me to play “21 question” with him, if you do not know what this is, it is when you ask eachother 21 questions of your pick. He asked me how far would I […]

Im gona die very soon or later coz im way too depressed deze days beacuse of the problems im goin through. words are not enof to mention da pain im suffering . i wil try to hung myself , if i failed ill definitely stab myself for sho. i dont mind changing my decision if someone can  help me go through deze probs.

wana help me survive – contact me

benpark.providence@gmail.com

Do you ever feel so alone that you just want to curl up in a corner and cry? I feel like that almost every day. I’m that girl who grew up and was obnoxious and was not afraid to be herself. I completly regret that now. I am constantly made fun of. I’m that girl who hangs out with the most popular girls and does not get any guys to like her. I feel like I’m ugly, fat, and unwanted. I cry everynight. I don’t even care anymore. Boys won’t like me because they find me annoying. I have no one to go to, because […]

I hate my life.. I hate feeling like this but I can’t help it…Every morning is more and more difficult.
I’m 18 and I’ve never really had a boyfriend except of the 5-days “relationship” when I was 9.. funny right? I’ve never kissed a boy, I’ve never felt the warmth of a hug from that “special one”, I’ve never held hands with someone.. These small things seem unimportant for the most of the people but not for me.. I want to be loved..not the kind of love your family gives you but the other kind..
I never express my feelings. I keep everything inside..That’s bad, […]