I Will Survive

I did this, you can too.

3

After 5 years .. I am back again at suicide project !

  July 24th, 2018 by jano.19

The Last time I posted was FIVE years ago ..

I never though I’d ever come back .!

Yet here I am

I guess we never really change !

no matter how hard we try to change ourselves deep down we will always be the same .

I fought hard .. and I’m still fighting .. I’m not really willing to surrender not before not now not ever

yet still my inner self , my flaws , my weaknesses.. are catching up with me ..

spend the last five years in what I developed to br a stable life .. it is actually to most people it’s what they want .

I got …

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0

Fine… Im Fine

  July 23rd, 2018 by razorwrists

Sometimes I just feel down and sometimes I feel as if im being held down by something so big I cant breathe It casts a shadow over me I cant quite tell how big but its big enough to cover my mind its so dark I struggle to smile people think they know but there just as lost as me they offer advice but it passes by my head like a breeze not a small breeze its like the breathe of the shadow it inhales and I feel blank then it exhales and still nothing happens im at a stand still but I don’t know …

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5

What do you do when you can’t feel anything? Just emptiness, numbness… I can’t do anything.  I’m suicidal. Ive tried so many times. I tried to get better. I stopped taking antidepressants for 2 months now. I didn’t want to depend on it anymore.

4

Milestones

  July 13th, 2018 by lynndo

On July 14th, 2000, I survived being born.

On April 5th, 2003, I survived my first surgery.

In Spring 2009, I survived my entire grade hating me because of a rumour.

On February 8th, 2010, I survived my first suicide attempt.

On September 14, 2014, I survived my first day of high school.

On February 15, 2018, I survived my first break-up.

On May 23, 2018, I survived being knocked unconscious in the middle of a lake.

On July 11, 2018, I survived a severe inhalation of muratic acid.

If I can survive all that, what’s stopping me from going one more day?

3

Going for the blind shot

  June 29th, 2018 by Urm8451n

There are financial problems incoming, that occur due to my mom’s chemotherapy.

There are new negative interview results coming for me.   There is the rich dad out there doing nothing to help me.

My so “used to be”  best friends are at this moment over the beach having fun with my ex girlfriend.

I have nothing at this moment to support me,  there is nothing at this moment to assure my future.

There is just that blind shot of succeeding this bachelor degree in Electrical and computer engineering.

I’m in my second year, and I’m the youngest student.  Even tho my age, it is impossible to find others who …

2

I wanted to share with you that I’m not doing well

  June 28th, 2018 by Urm8451n

I wanted to tell you that I’m broken inside.  I wanted to cry but I didn’t  succeed to.  I should’ve shown you that I have feelings too.  Explaining my life to you or anyone else was too hard for me to do.

I haven’t tried to be a stranger, I just didn’t want to acknowledge I’m a victim.

I always took a step back from you or others, because that is my way to dodge the hits.  I wish you could’ve seen it through my shades. I hope I’ll find someone like you along my ways.

I’m alone, but I’m not cracking up anymore.

I’m sad, but this time …

1

Procitaj me/read me

  June 21st, 2018 by life aint worth livin if you got no love

All right, this is the end of the road, what you have been looking for all along. I know you wanna read this, so lets get started. This is both my last note and last letter. Reason it has come to this is what you have done to me. I’m sorry for ever meeting you in the first place and happy I am leaving a world where “people” like you exist. I have decided to end this once and for all. Why did you do it, that night? Why? What did I do to you to deserve this? After almost a year of my life …

9

Me

  June 20th, 2018 by Killjoyinhell

I haven’t been feeling ok lately there’s a lot going on and I’ve been feeling very horrible about myself I’ve been doing very good at not self harming though and I’m a bit proud of myself

2

Hopeless

  June 19th, 2018 by unreaLily

I’m so fucking alone. One can’t just spout “I wished I was dead” to others. This is my first post here, it’s a bit ramble-y.

I don’t know what to do anymore. The suicidal impulses got better with medication, but I can’t move on and work and live my life like a normal person. Almost every day I hope to die.

I lived multiple suicide attempts, but I feel like I didn’t deserve to survive. I can’t support myself- why should I live? I feel like a disgrace of an adult. I only got a few years to get better, before my brain decides to quit trying. …

4

I’m going to win this

  June 19th, 2018 by Urm8451n

2018 , never thought I would get so far.

Just when doors are being shut, when knifes appear stabbed in my back, and everyone expect me to give up, I’m going to do the opposite.

I’m planning on winning this harsh times.

I’m screaming it out lout :
I will not give up.

I will not break DOWN.

I WILL GO THROUGH THIS

I WILL GROW THROUGH THIS.

Nothing will break me, because I’m choosing to win.

I’m in control here, and no disease, or financial problems, or tests, or other bad things, will scare me. I’m here to f**king win.

Stay strong,
Be brave.

Jac.

2

Not Even the half of it

  June 13th, 2018 by Lorilove1

This is what dealing with my anxiety looked like all through high school. And being bullied didn’t help my situation at all , I use to hide in my closet for hours with my headphones blasting My favorite music on repeat until each attack went away. I would cry myself to sleep wondering why I am the way I am. I wanted to commit suicide plenty of times ,  by cutting my wrist and watching myself bleed out. Thinking no one will miss me so why not , one period of time that really stuck out was  My freshman year of high school …

11

The noise won’t leave

  June 8th, 2018 by sansfranzdeput

I have Tourette’s Syndrome; OCD; light Autism; chronic and crippling depression, anxiety, and various medical differences/flaws/disorders. My Tourette’s- or tics, as they are often called-. manifest themselves mostly in my mind. With the exception of a few verbal tics, and a plethora of motor/physical tics, I can hide the urges and pain which plagues and afflicts me at my every waking moment. My wife and the rest of my immediate family are all well aware of my suffering; they, unfortunately, however, realize or wish to realize the full extent to which I am truly in pain. The only spans of consciousness wherein I draw pleasure …

1

All I want

  June 3rd, 2018 by Lovebug21

  1. Honestly I don’t want to die. I just want this pain that I feel bury me, to go away .I want to truly be happy .That’s all I want .Juat to be happy, and the people around me to be happy. I only want true happiness. Do I have to die to achive that?
3

I wanna give up

I wanna give up

  May 29th, 2018 by unicornkitty20

I just want to give up.. I tried killing myself a couple weeks ago but my bf took me to the hospital and they saved me. I just want it all to end! I’m so done with this place !! The only thing keeping me here today is my 2 precious kittens. I don’t know what to do..

2

Love

  May 25th, 2018 by alienCY

I think that living is loving. And true love isn’t just a couple or something. True love is sacrifice. If you try to take love from others to fill your gap then you end up emptier and the others are missing the love you took. If you give love to others though, even if you don’t have love, if you give a piece of you away; you will find yourself more full than before. Loving is giving what you are missing. Love is really beyond logic, it doesn’t make sense, just like life. However, at the end, love is the only thing that remains and …

2

Life

  May 24th, 2018 by alienCY

What if Life has no meaning without being meaningless?
What if Life is the meaning?
What if we are meant to be alive?
It may sound obvious but are we really alive?
And if we are not, isn’t it time to become?

2

~rant~

  May 13th, 2018 by why949

Why am i so fucking weak!!! I swear i almost crued today bc my mom said something slightly mean. I just want to fucking end it. I rewatched the end of 13 reasons why so i could watch her kill herself. It seems so easy. I upset the onky person who seems to care about me the other day and i thought she hated me and im like 90% sure she actually does. I just want to die. I absolutely feel worthless to everyone. I keep razors in the back of my phone and I cut at school bc it makes me very slightly happier. …

2

DEATH SOMETIMES WALKS ON PADDED FEET

  May 5th, 2018 by s.h45@yahoo.com

 

When death is so near, sometimes it walks on padded feet, strumming the ground like a guitarist, rhythmically – louder – softer, then with fingers on the wood, tap, tap… tap, tap. The sound is everywhere, no one can hear it but the poor fuck.   It builds and then suddenly subsides, then as each pebble of doubt and every dark word is cast into the waters of his mind, the song builds again on each ripple.   Inside his head each wave combines with the last, getting larger and larger. With the sound of the pebbles dropping into the water, cast by each tap, tap… tap, …

1

Will it fade or just level out?

  May 4th, 2018 by mo992

When I’m happy, I often worry and get anxious that it wouldn’t last long.

Depriving myself of the pleasure of that moment. But I can’t seem to help it, past experience has always proved to me that my short moments of happiness swiftly follow with long painful experiences. It happens so often I have run out of fingers and toes to count.

Perhaps there are just people in the world whose jobs it is to absorb all the pain and suffering. Perhaps I am just one of those people who will never truly experience long periods of happiness.

Voice within my head : “Be positive, be optimistic. That’s …

1

I Got a Song For You Men

  May 1st, 2018 by BlueDiamond