I run to this like it’ll truly make things better. but really this is just an escape for a few minutes. i didnt even have to wait a whole day today to come back on here. it was made simple for me earlier today. things got turned upside down again. and again…and again. endure the wrath or change. 2 results. 1 has already been given, but yet satisfaction has not been reached. so you’ll keep burning me. until all my flesh has turned to ashes. and theres nothing left to burn. it is admirable to stand by someone who chooses to burn you. im not […]
I almost cracked in front of my entire family. Or i did crack, partially?! I don’t know.
i started rambling about not having a desire to live, honestly i just said that to shut them up because they were talking about responsibilities of today’s youth and how it was different and much harder when they were young. Fine it was, let them have their past but keep it for yourself because i am not feeble- minded.
I thought i won’t be coming here anymore, but i guess i still have the need. since i can’t talk to anyone, i mean i can’t talk how depressed i […]
it brought terror and fear, i dont get it. i WANT to die and i acted on it last night, but once everything went down hill i knew maybe death isnt the answer to life’s problems? it started with a headache i ignored it, i felt sharp stabbing pains going all down my back, everytime i stood up i was to weak and the pain was to annoying to just keep moving so i’d stand up and fall to my knees and rest this scared me. then i gave up attempting to walk let alone stand, so i just layed in bed then i started […]
hello, Â I’ve been sad for quite some time, I’ve attempted to commit so many times, so many different ways. Here’s alittle bit of my background, I was inlove, I had friends, I had a good job. Everything is gone, I’m not happy anymore, life has manage to take everything away from me. Did I cause this? was it my fault that everyone is gone? For the past week I have been researching on different ways to commit, I came across this website and here I am, making my first post.
I think I felt inlove with my eyes close. I knew it was true love, I […]
I don’t know how to begin this post so I will just start somewhere. I am a hated human being by everyone. Including my family who always talk about me behind my back saying how horrible of a person I am. I’ve heard them. Â I have social issues because I am homeschooled and when I took a class at a local school people thought I was too weird and never talked to me because I never talked and I didn’t like the things they liked. I couldn’t wait to get out of there. And of course they talked about how weird I was when I […]
I can’t believe I keep letting this happen.
I have this boy I love having sexual intercourse with, he’s absolutely amazing, everything is nice and perfect size.
Anyway, he’s always treated me pretty bad, like there’s no relationship here just casual sex but still, respect is needed and this thing works two ways, okay so he was all like keen and now he’s only allowed to ask me when he’s keen I’m not allowed like seriously.
Oh and now he’s bringing more people into it. I don’t know how to say no so I go along with it. And tonight it’s just gotten out of […]
I don’t know about any of this any more. I try not to get into this feelings, into this temptation to end everything but lately it has just become to much. Never have I experienced it this bad, to the point where I actually wake up in the morning extremely disappointed and wishing that God would have finally answered my prayers and just taken me.
I try hard for others going through this and I tell them to keep strong, just to hold on but look at me! I can’t even listen to myself! I can’t even hold on, It’s like everything I once had just […]
Once when I was little I was happy and carefree I used to run around laughing
Until it was time for tea I used to play games And smile all the time I used to feel on top of the world I used to feel fine It’s amazing how things change When people let you down And how that once happy face Turns into a solemn frown
You search and search For someone who cares Anyone who understands Anyone who dares Loneliness, it hurts It kills you deep inside It makes you feel empty It stops you in your stride You cry yourself to sleep Hugging your pillow tight Wishing for someone To hold you through the night Once when I was little I was happy and carefree Now […]
I can’t … I mean. Every time I start to get close to someone on here, I lose them. I almost feel like I’m what ended them cuz it’s right after I start talking to them. Everlasting, Khajiit (assumed until further notice, the’re talking about her on facebook and she’s been off fb since the 5th) and Lifeblows, oh and yourbabeforlifee… Probly Cassidy and Kat are dead too (don’t even remember their usernames) They haven’t emailed in months. I can’t get close to people who don’t understand cuz they don’t get it and always hurt me, and now I can’t get close to those who […]
This is what some people believe. When one cuts through whatever emotion one is feeling right now, it’s rooted in either love or fear.
I believe that the reason that we have come to this site is because we have let fear-based emotions rule our lives. Anger, hate, frustration, anxiety, sadness, shame, regret … these feelings are all fundamentally driven by fear. In my case, I’m angry at myself. I hate my work situation. I feel great shame in being a burden on so many people. I’m frustrated by my relationship. I regret not having the balls to be true to myself – this lack of […]
oh im so tired, really tired emotionally and physically and mentally, the urge to cut is getting stronger, whats one more scar right? errghh well i have to go out today, maby its good, i might get some distraction but if i dont mann im going to feel worse when i come back.anyhows hopefully you guys have something resembling a good day 🙂
When i first decided to stop drinking and eating entirely I made the decision to die, at the time that I began my painful journey I had already felt no need to eat anything at all, the thought of a big juicy hamburger nauseated me. With many of those seeking a chance to escape, I plea with you to decide between Irrational Suicide and Compassionate death, I know that it may sound ridiculous to for whatever reason to willingly kill yourself, period. Many people who take this path are those who are already dying and have wanted to shorten their suffering, this is the difference […]
Why are we all here on this site ?
It’s the problem of pain, we want to destroy !
Where the pain come from ?
From non-acceptance !
Of people that reject.
And the main role in play, it is we, who won’t even accept ourself.
And worse way round, we even want to change others, but sure to fail !
We hate this, we hate that.
And it’s so common to be told, just change this or that, we’ll be alright.
But easier said than done, to change ?
We are already where we are, and that’s it, all that we humbly (or proudly) need is to first […]
Somebody just talk to me…ive lost it all
I am here just to tell anyone and everyone that suicide is not worth it. I am a victim to depression and I once considered committing suicide. With tears in my eyes and a knife in my hand, I thought to myself. Is this really the only way to be happy, is life really all about misery and sorrow? I put the knife down. I confesed to my mom and she said we could give therapy a try. At first I was very sceptic because I did not like the idea of telling a random stranger all my secrets. But after a while, my depression […]
That feeling of just finally being fed up with being torn down and run over by anyone and practically everyone. That feeling of no longer being able to hold on any longer because you have no energy left; but even if you did you just don’t want to put up with it any more.
Why hold onto a life that you’re so miserable in? I know it’s selfish to take my own life because it effects those who cared about me and everyone that has ever come into some sort of contact with me. But c’mon, it’s also selfish on the part of those who try and talk […]
Its happening again. can someone help me. I feel that peak, that moment approaching again. but this time the decision has already been made. I wont be brought to that point again and not go through with it. I will ignore any signals this time because those signals will be like the ones from b4- a fake illusions to buy time for right now. Im very sad…very dark…i dont want nothing but a solution as to how to do this quietly and quickly. I want to plan it properly. Start a fight or some reason for me to be gone for a few days, I […]
I’m not really good at anything besides listening to people.
I’ve always wanted to become a writer, photographer, artist, music maker.
But I’m not good at any of those things.
Anything really, besides listening to people.
Having that be my career… Listening to people (therapist) but once again; no one listening to me,
It hurts me . It seems stupid but it does.
Now don’t get me wrong, I love helping people… I just wanted to do something else.
But it’s whatever, right.. ?
Being in a long term relationship and lonely.
My chest feels like it is about to fucking explode. I feel like I am about to completely break down. Oh God, all I want is for this to stop! I am so tired of this FUCKING CYCLE: I just want this to stop…. why does being alone have to hurt so much.
I want to cut. No. I need to cut. It has been 84 days since that blade tasted skin. Who was I to think that I could ever overcome depression, huh? Who was I to think that I could ever stop cutting permanently, hmm? Let’s face it the blade has always been there […]