Tag:

4 Months

Join Us Here, One and All!

by RealTalk30 9/24/2013

written by RealTalk30

Hello, new people of the SuicideProject.

My name is Ryan, but you can just call me RealTalk30, or RealTalk, or RT3, or just RT. I am 31 years old and I live in California USA. I’ve been frequenting this web site for about 4 months now, and I’ve become a regular here. I’ve met some really amazing people here, and it’s unfortunate that such amazing people can be so alone, scared and angry. We all have our reasons for being here. My reason for being here is that there is no other place for my selective opinions, not too many places like this one where I […]

9/24/2013 112 comments

a phonecall

by lexq19 9/23/2013

written by lexq19

i had to abandon my two best friends 4 months ago. we were three and we had that kind of friendship that we couldn’t stay all day without seeing each other. we were brothers.

my friendship had started with them and along with this friendship i started to do cocaine. we all did cocaine. we were three cokeheads. three junkies. but fuck! we were three mothercuking brothers, and that no one can deny.

but when i was with those brothers, i forget about my real ones. my real brothers. my brother, my sister and my parents. i forgot my family. i and i’m sorry for that, for […]

9/23/2013 0 comment

by spillageaisle6 9/9/2013

written by spillageaisle6

lately, i am scared of myself. terrified of the idea that i’m not even sure anymore what or who i am. Â i find myself looking at my hands, my arms, my wrists and i feel like this is not me. that somehow, the “me” got lost in all of this. and i look back at pictures of myself as a kid, and i cannot connect with the person i am meant to be. not even in the pictures of my childhood i am smiling. i honestly don’t believe i ever experienced the feeling of “happiness” . sometimes i have no emotion at all, but there […]

9/9/2013 0 comment

Lost Everything I had.

by alison miller_bloodspot 8/15/2013

written by alison miller_bloodspot

Well.How do I start?… Ummm . okay here it goes.Its been almost 4 months that he is gone.I loved him so much and so did he. Yes, my GUY. He died b’cuz of some heart problem. 🙁 . Im 14 years old and life seems like its going to get over.We were in a relationship for 4 years on the whole. He is everything for me.But now I miss him. And I feel like dying . It hurts to know that he is no more, i wanna go away with him.And before he died we fought the other day. He asked me whether I could […]

8/15/2013 4 comments

My Struggle…..

by zombielovergirl122 7/17/2013

written by zombielovergirl122

So, I have been planning on suicide on the 3rd next month. People are telling me not too but, I literally can’t take the pain anymore. I cut last night and I was clean for more than 3 months! But, anyways here’s my pointless story..

So, Last year. ‘8-3-12’ I kinda thought I was in love.
About a couple months into our relationship it was getting a little depressed.
The guy, Jt, told me he loved me everything and then a couple days later,
He just left me and told me everything was getting taken away from him,
his phone,ps3, home phone, etc.
So, I said […]

7/17/2013 1 comment

How it has Affected Me

by lifeisajoy 6/17/2013

written by lifeisajoy

Suicide to me 4 months ago seemed like only something I would hear in long hours of health class or something that would never affect me. Living in a small town of about 7,000 people you would only hear things along the line of sporting events or town meetings. Never anything about death. Until March 13th, 2012, I was sitting in the recliner debating whether or not i should go to church that night. I decided not to because I wanted to relax for the night. My step dad and I were watching TV when all of sudden we look outside to see 2 cars […]

6/17/2013 1 comment

I’m losing “my” first girl I really love. Am I ?

by immense 6/16/2013

written by immense

Hello,

First of, all. i’m not sure if this is a part of the project, but it made me laugh indeed.
” ERROR: Banned by WangGuard Is a mistake?.”
Anyway…
I’ll keep it short 🙂 10 months ago, I have met a very interesting person, over the Internet. Actually, SHE met me (chatted me up on some forum, where I trolled, never wanted to see anyone, but I made one exeption this time). So we chatted. I liked fer. Later, a lot.. Then she said something like “I do not believe you are real, come and meet me” So I did, we did. This went for 4 […]

6/16/2013 2 comments

Boys..?

by marissa1118 5/19/2013

written by marissa1118

Last year I had a bf for 4 months. Not exactly the longest relationship, but it was still pretty long. We had 4 classes together and lunch. His name was John. He was my everything and I was his. We were the couple that everyone thought was cute and would last forever you know? Of course it didn’t. We ended really bad. I tried to be friends with him but I miss him, and I think I still like him. He doesn’t want anything to do with me. He’s embarrassed to talk to me. Why does it hurt so much?

5/19/2013 0 comment

Hi..

by skeletonsInthecloset 5/8/2013

written by skeletonsInthecloset

my names shavon. im 15. i feel like one of those people from alcoholics anonymous. but really im suicide anonymous. i tried to commit suicide before. my arms are full of scars. my mom started physically and emotionally abusing me when i was 8. ever since then ive been looking for someone that could help me. nobody in my family helped me. i had a boyfriend named kody. and he used me and took my virginity. i tried to kill myself and he didnt even text me at all while i was in the hospital. i pushed my way through to recovery and got over […]

5/8/2013 2 comments

There’s no winning.

by WoundedSoul 4/13/2013

written by WoundedSoul

Well, I finally found my first relationship, at the age of 26. It really did help me to find peace. It’s actually been really nice to have the first time in my life, and I mean this entirely literally, that I didn’t think about suicide every single day. It slowly drifted back, a little, but only just barely, and only just a few time every couple of weeks or so. It hasn’t been terrible. I have realized some things, that I had already considered, but I am far too old a soul for all these senseless children. My boyfriend, and just for the sake of […]

4/13/2013 3 comments

why do i even try

by alice123 3/14/2013

written by alice123

every time i try to be happy it always ends up in a disaster
i have always been bullied all my life ever since i was a little girl. i am 15 now and i am still being Put down by others because i dress different and my way of thinking is different than others. i can’t seem to fit in ….. i mean i don’t want to fit in its great to be different but the insults and rumors …. and THE lies are what hurt me. all i ever wanted, was for my life to be different and… for me to be happy. […]

3/14/2013 4 comments

4 months…thank you.

by OddOneOut 3/13/2013

written by OddOneOut

That was all it could give me….4 months free of cuts and suicidal thoughts, seeing life in a brighter light.
4 months of not coming on this site and yet still being able to survive.
Not anymore, though.

Life is back. My R&R is over.
Time to get back on the wagon.
Welcome back, *****.

3/13/2013 3 comments

Like they REALLY want to help me. NOT -.-

by Engeltje 3/7/2013

written by Engeltje

FUCK THEM!!!
FUCK THOSE THERAPISTS!!!!!

I’m really mad right now…The therapists say that they want to make me better and they will do everything to make me better. Yeah right. I’ve been in therapy for ten months now there and it only got worse and worse. I have going to the part-time therapy (5 days a week from 9 am till 3 pm) for 4 months now, and I have reached none of my goals. And those therapists…. they really sucked!! I really feel like they don’t take me serious. This was a conversation I had a few weeks ago when I told the therapists that […]

3/7/2013 0 comment

The Real World

by j@kobgui 3/6/2013

written by j@kobgui

The real world isn’t rainbows and sparkles.

It’s not always fun and rarely easy.

Honestly its far from easy or fun.

It’s cruel and brutal,

Cold and heartless,

Unforgiving and dark,

Depressing and awful,

Bitchy and duechey,

Pointless and crazy,

And so are the people in the fucked up world.

Its full of the terrible people,

people that feed off your pain,

they will do anything to make you suffer.

People are vile and cruel.

They will do anything to make you miserable.

Some days they are going to win,

but some day they will lose and you will realize how strong you are.

3/6/2013 3 comments

I was hoping to seem some change

by Butcheredpanda 3/4/2013

written by Butcheredpanda

So I wrote this post 4 months ago already;

The future doesnt seem bright

I was seriously trying and hoping to see a positive change, I didnt expect that everything was right again, but at least expected something positive.

Well guess what, there is none. Every day is getting worse and worse. Everyday I am having a crapload of headaches, completely destroying the ability to do something good, something helpful for a day. These headaches, I am sure they keep holding me back, if i didnt have them I am confident in my ability to improve stuff in my life, but guess what, I dont even get […]

3/4/2013 0 comment

My past and present…

by lostthesighttolive 2/19/2013

written by lostthesighttolive

My whole life I have had horrible luck. I always had to struggle for the things I wanted while the people around me just got it handed to them.

I started self harming when I was around 11 it started out as light cutting on my left arm and then once I made enough cuts I would stop until they healed
One night I decided to write a suicide note and take a bunch of pills. I took around 60 pills of all kinds, some sleeping pills, some pain relievers, some pills that were just there. What ever pills I had I took them
Some […]

2/19/2013 2 comments

He’s killing me

by DeadlyLove 2/10/2013

written by DeadlyLove

Hi – I’m a 22 year old girl, and I have had the luck to find someone who is the perfect match for me. If something like a “soulmate” exists, then I found mine, the love of my life. However, over 4 months ago I lost him to amnesia….he’s a soldier and he experienced a very bad psychic trauma, since that he forgot nearly everything about his past and his life. Of course, I was gone too. Over the months some of his memories came back, but nothing about me…I only saw him twice in this condition, and the last time was over 2 months […]

2/10/2013 2 comments

I FUCKING HHHHHHAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTEEEEEEEEEEEEE PEOPLE!!!!

by ouch 1/30/2013

written by ouch

After putting a gun to my head yesterday I decided to go see my psychiatrist today. Â I called the ombudsman in my area about his lack of ethical behavior earlier this year. Â After 4 months, the case was assigned a ‘resolved’ status without my knowledge. Â I MADE THE FUCKING COMPLAINT!!! Â How can it be resolved without me even being notified? Â The agency has lied to the ombudsman from day one and she told me that they told her the situation had been resolved. Â I asked her what the resolution was cause I sure wasn’t included in that decision. Â The agency told the ombuds that they […]

1/30/2013 11 comments

Enough Time

by Rain 1/17/2013

written by Rain

After 4 months of not cutting…I’m going to cut tonight.
You dont have to read this and, believe me, i’m not writing this for you.
I’m writing this for me.
For forever I have been trying to show people that I understand and that they’re not alone and that i’ll be here for anyoneÂ and I was never needed.
For too long have I held off on cutting for your fucking happiness and so YOU wont have to be disgusted with my fresh wounds.
For years have I held out on stealing YOUR boyfriend because I know that we’re soulmates and HE kissed ME and I […]

1/17/2013 8 comments

My Depression: The real reasons…

by CryingForHelp 12/29/2012

written by CryingForHelp

Hi, I’m Destanie. I’m 15 years old. I turn 16 in May, but I don’t think I’m going to make it to see my birthday. Here’s why….

Back in June of 2012 i fell in love with this guy Tyler. He gave me the happiness I needed. He made me feel loved and wanted. We started dating but it only lasted about a week. For 3-4 months after that, I kept trying to tell him I still loved him. Finally he started talking to me again and I told him.. He told me he still loved me too and that he wants to make things right. […]

12/29/2012 10 comments

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