Sooo.. Recently I have been having suicidal thoughts for several reasons. Most of them I’m sure no-one will ever understand, because we all view the world differently, what may mean the world to someone may mean absolutely nothing to another person, so with that in mind my suicide thoughts have done nothing for me but make me feel even worse about myself, but I am now realizing that life is hard on everyone, some just handle it better than others. now, my family means the world to me and 90percent of the time when I am soooo close to killing myself.. I think about how selfish […]
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Brother
Well, my friend wants me to try shrooms with him and i don’t know if i should or not. im not afraid of being fucked up im afraid of what actions i might act on that are in my head.. whether it be harming myself or finally snapping and going off on some “friends”
im afraid the thoughts in my mind will turn into reality and then ill be trapped in my own helish […]
I wish i would just do it, but why make the ones i love feel the way i do :(
by waste2304
written by waste2304
Hello im waste2304
I honestly don t know why im ganna air all this out here but i guess i hope i can help someone else see it the way i do today i signed up for this site because i need someone…anyone to listen to me i mean im going so crazy and i just need somebody who wont judge me to please just listen to me….every since i was 13 ive attempted to hurt myself a multitude of times…it made all the pain just go away…the depression was killing me and still does till this day…and people say they understand but they truly will […]
To whom ever says they know me
If I didn’t want to live
Here is what I’d give
I’d give the breathe that fills my lungs
The food that will taste sour to my tongue
I would give the wayward mind I have
The undecided and unknown path
I’d give up everything
If I didn’t want to live
If I didn’t like humanity
Understand without unnecessary pity
We are overly selfish and dramatic
Obnoxiously annoying and spastic
We dwell to long on things I want forgotten
Too many people assume how I’ve gotten
If I didn’t like humanity
Perhaps I didn’t want to live
If I didn’t like myself
Here is the basic line up on the shelf
I am pudgy to others […]
I wished to die. Many times. Sometimes I would like awake at night, wishing that I would never wake up. I hate my job. My job hates me, My mom blames me for everything. My brother calls me stupid and overreacting. I can’t open up to anyone because they’ll think I am being overly dramatic. It hurts. And outside, I pretend to be cheerful and caring because I know that that’s how people get to like you, It hurt before when my friends all left me when I became “emo.” I learned that you shouldn’t let friends know what you really feel. Well, honestly, I […]
I’m sorry for the upcoming vent, I need to get it out.
So, I really want to kill myself right now.
I just miss my brother like hell, ever since he took his own life about 10 months ago, i haven’t been happy. Time drags me through life but i don’t want to. I don’t want to move on because it feels like forgetting. And I hate myself because i feel like i’m already starting to forget how exactly his voice sounded or how his smile was. He was my everything, besides my brother also my best friend.
Then besides that, i feel so lonely. It […]
I think I finnally understand why you people want to kill yourself and why my brother killed himself. I guess you have this image of what you want to be and a totally opposite image of what you think you are. You think about yourself in a very negative way and “all” you want is to be is perfect,so you would stop letting everybody down. And you just cant change. You stay the same negative person and you want to be positive more than ever. This gap between who you are and who you want to be is getting bigger and bigger until… Someone said, […]
My mother hates me. I dont know why she does, I have four siblings and she nevertalks to them the way she does me. She’s always looking fr something to shout at me for. I lost count of how many times she’s told me to go kill my self or how she wishes that one morning she’d wake up and find me dead. I’ve no one to talk to and it hurts. Growing up all I knew was abuse from my mom and brother she hit me with text books for getting wrong answers when I was 6 years old. When we would go out […]
I am 19. I used to get bullied and sexually abused when I was in elementary school. In middle school, there was no sexual abuse just bullying, but I met Him. We didn’t go to the same middle school, but he lived across the street from me. I was at his house every day when I got out of school. His brother, Him, and I. We were always alone as their uncle and aunt were always out working or partying. Soon, it was only he and I..together alway. We went to the same highschool and I was bullied no more. He had given me a […]
I really need to stop pussyfooting around my impending suicide and make a decision soon. Â When my brother leaves in a few months I will order some poison and take it and end my miserable existence. Â That’s that. Â Nothing will change my mind. Â My life is literally torture.
Well, I’ve been psycho for past few months. I got betrayed by my friend, live bullying and shit. Some damn kids use the adult relationships to ruin my life since kid. They bully me for so many years already and still do. It’s very humiliating cause they’re like 6 years or younger than me.
At school, I am forced to tell jokes to please my friends. I just get addicted to it. I couldn’t quit.
I also got severe pain or knife moving inside my face. Yes, I mean KNIFE. It mutated, moves and hurts like hell for every damn second for the past decade. It’s like […]
I saw my mum for the first time in a few weeks today. She turned to me and said all she has in the world is me, my brother and her husband, but that I was her rock. She’s been going through her own trouble, battling her own demons for a long time. Little did she know her rock was crying down the phone to the Samaritans last night, that I was crying down the phone just to feel something. How can I ever tell her that I want to die? How can I tell her that every day I smash up my sanity just […]
Well, isn’t this great. Just when my suicidal thoughts start to lessen, i start having homocidal ones. Last night I was looking at my little 5-year-old brother, who I love and adore. And then I started laughing like a freaking maniac. I didn’t know why I did. It just felt so good to laugh. I realised later why I laughed so demonically. It was because I wanted to kill him. I wanted to slit his throat. I don’t want to kill him, or anyone, for that matter now. I don’t know why…it was like I wasn’t even in control of myself. I just don’t […]
I wanna know what I did so horrible to get such a harf life like this I’m only 17 yrs old I lost my brother & dad to suicide I’m homeless my mom couldn’t care any less about me. It seems like all everyone ever wants to do is hurt & break me down What have I done to get such a hard life? Im terrified or death but it seems like its the only way out of this piece of shit life I have? What is the real meaning of all that I’m being put through cause it isnt to make me stronger. I […]
I can’t do this.
With every new experience, everything I do, I just get broken down more by how stupid the world is.
I always thought I got out of my parents’ house, faced my fears, I’d be ok. That everything would get better. But now I’m moved out and everything still sucks.
Boyfriend is away for two and a half weeks. It hasn’t even been one and I’m meh and depressed and mad. He said we’d talk “lots.” Lots for us is constantly. We’ve barely talked at all. I’ve talked to his older brother more than to him. And mostly I’m just mad at his parents for […]
My story THERE IS ALOT TO READ SO GET COMFORTABLE and I wish I could give all those people who read the whole thing a damn cookie or something for their efforts!
Right from the beginning my childhood was far from ideal. My mother was a drug addict and gave no affection or encouragement that I can remember.
I never met my father until later in my childhood, he also turned out to be a scary looking toothless drug addict and acted like he knew me far too well which didn’t sit well with me at all.
When I was born I had two older brothers, […]
I want to die, i hate my life my family is terrible my brother is crazy ,a thief and a horrible person, his purpose in life is to annoy people, and my sister makes me feel bad about everything you come home happy she opens her mouth you want to kill yourself, school is awful, the only reason i am going is because my parents abuse me and i can’t say no to them also my father won’t give me a dime so i have to go to sell people answers to tests, homework and exams so i can get enough change to combine into […]
ive gotten fat… im getting better at putting on a smile. ive been dressing nicer and more preppy. ive been laughing more. ive been crying less. ive been arguing more. ive been thinking ab0ut him more. ive been treated worse. ive been told everything will be ok but ive been told that before. ive been keeping everything inside like i used to. im reverting back to the old me. perfect pretty girl. loud and outgoing sarcastic with everything put together. hah what a fucking joke. but i am so good at keeping everything in. ive only been cutting on my wrists so i can hide […]
I’m not sure how to say this, I’ve never posted on something like this before. But I quit.
I’m turning 18 in almost 2 weeks, but I don’t think I’ll last that long. I’m depressed, I have been for a while, but instead of accepting that and finding a way to cope with it, my dad is ignoring it. I really noticed it after my mom passed away a year and a half ago. Granted, it’s normal to be sadder than usual during that time, I realize this. To try and cheer up, I tried looking back at the time before we learned she had cancer, […]
Hi I’m a 13 y/o girl from Sweden that at the moment feel like shit.. My whole life has been hard and so on but now I just want to die. My brother is the main problem, he hits me sometimes but not hard or anything, it the words he says. My whole life he’s been there to tell me that i will fail, I’m nothing, useless. Now those words are the truth in my eyes. He scares the living hell out of me, when he gets mad (and that is pretty much every day) I usually run to the bathroom. Then I will sit […]