Tag:

in the

Day dreaming about it

by kupo95 3/26/2016

written by kupo95

The only thind that make lookk forward to lake tahoe is there nothing tieing my in-laws there they “Say there leaveing it in August” so whats keeping me from taking my life there? …. Nothing .

Theysay money is coming easy there so If I make enough. I gooe the resorts have a comfey bed and food feathered down blanket there. so I can take something to sleep and not wake up .

Or a nice bath to take box cutter to my arm and drift away I like water. My family will give up onme the second I get the plane so there no worrie about […]

3/26/2016 3 comments

Hello I’m tired as fuck lets see what wacky shit happens

by Sui the Bunny 3/26/2016

written by Sui the Bunny

i’m hungryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy hfghddghnbvdghgbxfgdhb hehe my name is in the word sushi see suishi <— yay SUIshi -3- I LIKE TO EAT CHEESEBURGERS AND COOKIES… COOKIES MAKE ME FEEL BETTER YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY FOR FOOD GGGHGTEDFGHNJFYJFHBNGFTJTFJTRJYGFHDNDGNDG (I’m going to be so regretting this in the morning like a bad hangover XD) DON’T STOP ME NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW I’M HAVING SUCH A GOOD TIME I’M HAVING A BALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL DON’T STOP ME NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW IF YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU WANNA HAVE A GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD TIME JUST GIVE MERHHHHHHH A CALLLLLLLLLLLLLL…. wait no don’t call me I didn’t give you my number O-O if you do call… HOW DID YOU GET MY NUMBER?!?!?!?!? O-O OMG I’M NOT GOING […]

3/26/2016 133 comments

Dark hole

by Drowning 3/25/2016

written by Drowning

When uv been depressed and suicidal for a long time you start to embrace the darkness finding ways to stay alive in the dark fog by self harming changing one pain for another only thing that helps emotional pain and thinking of death can calm ones active mind thinkin of a method iv got 3 methods to choose from OD not to keen on hanging might need to think more about needs planning and drinking poison need to do research or try the wrist

i don’t do highs and trains think it’s brutal shotgun to the face is the dream I feel so calm talking about […]

3/25/2016 6 comments

Kind of an Update Thing?

by JiminyCrispies 3/25/2016

written by JiminyCrispies

Before I start my post, I’m apologising for the lack of replies to the comments on my last post. I wasn’t in the right frame of mind the other day, so I thought it was best to not reply at that time.
The last two days have been particularly awful. My moods have been so irregular I’ve had to leave rooms because everyone is utterly pissed at the lack of stability. And the voices are so frequent I feel like my head is going to explode. I can’t cope with the constant noise.

The figures aren’t much better. I see things everywhere now; I can’t look […]

3/25/2016 0 comment

Protected: Today, I’m a hideous lardbeast. But I’m going to try to be okay with that.

by whiskered-fish 3/25/2016

written by whiskered-fish

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

3/25/2016 31 comments

Rambling from a dark place

by arichards 3/24/2016

written by arichards

I don’t know how to go on anymore. I don’t know who I am without the context of someone else. When I’m alone, I hate myself. I don’t want to live feeling this way. I don’t want to be an angry person and I don’t want to hurt other people. It’s the reason why I want to die and the reason why I live. I hate the contradiction. I’m constantly hoping, dreaming that the choice will be taken out of my hands (e.g. hit by a semi, shot in a drive-by, mugged and killed in the street, etc.) because I don’t know what to do.

I’m […]

3/24/2016 2 comments

Another day..

by headupunderdarkcloud 3/24/2016

written by headupunderdarkcloud

Another day without her.
Another day with the painful memories of the past.
Another day I need to move my stuff out. 7 days left here at this place that saw everything fall apart.
Another day still don’t know where going to next.
3 cigarettes and memories of how things once were, where things were going, between sips of black coffee, trying to wrap my head around how things came to this. How I became this person, unrecognizable from photos taken only 10 months before.
The fear it’ll never get better, and only possibly worse.
Homeless at 34, abandoned hope for a brighter future, the […]

3/24/2016 3 comments

Decisions

by depressed otaku 3/24/2016

written by depressed otaku

Well its finally come down to it I’m either going to end it all in the most lethal and consequently probably most painful method possible today or I’m going to go the hospital and go back to the psych ward to try to get some help tomorrow. Honestly I’d rather end it because I doubt getting help will really work but getting myself to use a means like that is really difficult

3/24/2016 2 comments

zombies

by Alan Ominous 3/24/2016

written by Alan Ominous

So last night, Cordless suggested I write a cook book for zombies. Which reminds me, I’m deathly afraid of zombies. I whole heartily believe they do exist. Mass exposure is inevitable.

Do you believe?

Here’s why I do:
I use to work in the pharmaceutical industry.I’ve been to hidden under ground labs, labs inside of caves, research facilities the size of cities; complete with apartments, schools, movie theaters, fire and police. I’ve been to labs protected with sniper guard towers, razor wire and attack dogs. It’s unbelievable, I know, but I’ve been there. That is with about the lowest security clearance possible. How deep is that rabbit […]

3/24/2016 1 comment

Welcome back

by Drowning 3/23/2016

written by Drowning

it’s been a wile but I guess your due to return

Me-hay insomnia it’s been awhile

insomnia-I know you thought u could hide from me with sleeping pills right ?

me-umm well kinda yeah u keep me up all night messing with my head making me over think and drain the little life I have in me

insomnia – haha well I’m back to kick u in the teeth what u going to go with out them pills now huh ?

me-……..

Insomnia- you know your life a mess right ?

Me-no I didn’t know it was a mess actually I thought it was going fine if u ask me that’s why […]

3/23/2016 14 comments

by Drowning 3/23/2016

written by Drowning

My plan is kinda going to shit was meant to get more meds today and they didn’t put what I wanted in the bag maybe it was a mistake or maybe there on to my plan but it has pissed me off tho I feel much better knowing I have a method in place and when iv had enough I could try again but they are fucking with my plan here

3/23/2016 15 comments

by JiminyCrispies 3/23/2016

written by JiminyCrispies

I’m 97.3% sure my mum looked through my therapy diary. I’ve had to start writing about the voices until I next see my therapist, so I’ve been keeping it away from everyone. I specifically told her not to look in it and that’s it’s between me and my therapist.

However, she’s been acting weird around me today and out of the blue asks about the voices and if I’ve hurt myself again (I mentioned I did in the diary thing). The worst thing she could’ve done was look in it, because, although very brief descriptions, it has a basic summary of what they say. And they […]

3/23/2016 5 comments

gotta love all the work i do on a day off

by Wintergirl 3/23/2016

written by Wintergirl

I just got done with a sinkful of dishes. There’s laundry on the bathroom floor. There’s laundry in the dryer waiting for me. There’s some clutter in every room. My problem is I’m so easily distracted it takes me forever to get anything done…gotta pick out music, find just the right song, oh, it’s raining outside? Gotta find a different song. That counters a little dirty, hmm what’s going on at SP. Yeah. So this is just me getting all the noise out of my head.

I’m making TACOS for dinner. Over here we like to use this fajita steak in place of ground beef. It’s […]

3/23/2016 19 comments

to sportsballs , my first music request

by darkwillow 3/23/2016

written by darkwillow

Back to December by Taylor Swift, played on guitar for sportsballs. Wasn’t feeling piano today.. Maybe next time! Leave requests or comments if any 🙂 Ignore the many times i messed up in the video.. and the weird black spot like halfway through.. And the terrible quality.. I’ve had this phone for a while.. Night 🙂

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7S75URjiTiM&feature=youtu.be

3/23/2016 17 comments

Poem 1

by lonelyroses 3/23/2016

written by lonelyroses

As I sit in lonely silence
I realize my violence
I look to see my scars
And I wish upon the stars
For something simply brighter
Than trying to be a fighter
I’ve never felt so tired
It was you that I admired
You left me in the dust
When I thought that I could trust
All you said were lies
So I gave them a disguise
My immature mind
Made me think that you were kind
I would make this the end
But I feel I should defend
All the things you said
Didn’t want me to be dead
I know I love you […]

3/23/2016 8 comments

I’m sorry

by 3of6 3/22/2016

written by 3of6

I want to die. I want to leave this place. All I want to say is… I AM SORRY. I am sorry I am so broken. I am sorry I don’t make any sense. I am sorry I am a burden. I am sorry I have gotten in the way. I am sorry for leaving you, but I am also sorry I stayed so long. I am sorry I am the way I am. I am sorry I am sick. I am sorry I haven’t done or said the right things. I am sorry I haven’t tried hard enough. I know this is my fault […]

3/22/2016 9 comments

Untitled

by Drowning 3/22/2016

written by Drowning

so over the last new months iv been working on a song about how I feel being depressed suicidal still needs work but il share the first couple lines with u guys

– I keep trying to fill that fucking void inside it feels like life is just passing me by looking in the mirror iv totally lost who I am the cuts relieve the pressure can you save me from myself

alone and depressed anxiety stressed I’m hanging on for dear life but I dont see the reason why iv been thinking dose God really exist cause this is bull shit this is hell in living […]

3/22/2016 2 comments

Complete dread

by disgusting 3/22/2016

written by disgusting

I never thought I’d feel sick to my stomach with anger and dread, not wanting to go in to work. This has been the first full year that I’ve worked through a job, so I’ve never experienced anything like this before. And it’s the same thing I’ve heard my mom complain about why she absolutely loathes working. It’s because there’s always got to be some insufferable ***** there who makes everyone miserable!

So here’s what happened. The boss has been gone over a month now because she’s moving to another state. She’s supposed to be back at some point to tie up loose ends before she’s […]

3/22/2016 7 comments

The point of living

by Sui the Bunny 3/22/2016

written by Sui the Bunny

What’s the point of living, what makes us feel alive? I’m thinking/planning my escape route i’m sick of living. I don’t want to be alive anymore theres no point especially when your parent threatens to kill you themselves because you weren’t able to do the job yourself. 🙁 as i’m typing this i’m in the supermarket and chasing cars by snow patrol is playing.

-Suicide

3/22/2016 19 comments

Broken

by alina_01 3/22/2016

written by alina_01

I’ve lost 2 relatives that I was close to, both times I was woken up in the middle of the night and told they died. I get so afraid to sleep, in fact one of my worst fears is that I will loose my very closest and dearest loved ones while I sleep. I’ve had nightmares that it has happened and I wake up sobbing. My aunt died and they woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me. I have been battling some depression and Monday felt like a good day for me. Then I find out this morning that not […]

3/22/2016 1 comment

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