I’m thinking of doing it tomorrow night. 1/21/12 is when I die. I wanted to do it on my birthday. That was three months ago. Should have then. Should’ve done it along time ago. I know some people work through worse pain then I have experienced. I feel hopeless. I used to feel sorry for myself. Realized that gets you nowhere. Thinking about just walking in front of a semi. If I jump just at the right moment I should die. I know that it’s selfish to do. Especially in that way. Can’t really find another way to do it. No car. Can’t find good […]
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Mom
Not my first time here. I’ve created an account on here before, just forgot the username, pw, and email. :/ I doubt anyone care about that, cux I was barely active on here. I only submitted one post, and that was it. It was around this time when I’ve these thoughts.
What’s up with my life? Like majority of you on here, I’m just unsure anymore. Lot’s been going on. Mom’s diabete, hypertension, and kidney stone. Sister has hypertension. Dad has hypertension. Two brothers have hypertension, and possibly diabete as well. And here I am, well, fine. What the FUCK!!
I’m currently in college, majoring in pre-nursing. […]
i can’t seem to put into words exactly how i feel. I’m 26 and alone. Grade A (or F) loser. No car, job, friends. I have no drivers license. I’ve never had one. Had a girlfriend once. Only person I opened up to, but still withheld a lot. Wasn’t very ambitious in life. Don’t blame her for leaving me. Spent most of my life in a haze it seems. Ready to die may do it this weekend. Tried killing myself seven months ago by charcoal burning. Room got to hot and I blacked out woke up outside of hotel room. Felt stupid and even worse […]
Im so hurt at the moment… I lost my virginity to a 24 year old guy I’ve only known a month. Im 18, I made a promise to myself I would wait til marriage to have sex. It was important to me, it meant something. I’ve been this good girl my whole life, I rarely date. I would never do something like that, but I did…. I would barely let a boyfriend kiss me. I guess for the past year I’ve been in a spiral downfall and depression. My mom all my brothers moved, and I was left in this town. I’m still in high […]
I’m starting to really think that it would just be so much better if I was gone. I don’t have anyone, really. I mean, I guess I might, but that’s not the point of anything. I don’t care that I have no friends. That has nothing to do with why I want to end my life. I don’t know what it is. I can’t seem to figure out what has caused all of this, it started a few years ago and I thought it had gone away. I did and I was happy. Actually god damn happy, or so I thought. But, now that I […]
Truth, I’m here for a school project of my choice. Truth, I may have caused an attempted suicide and I fell for the friend who’s father shot himself on christmas…his life’s fucked up. Truth, I have nothing to complain about, I don’t get raped, I have two parents(stepdad but whatever) that love me and feed me and give me a roof over my head, I don’t live in a thrid world country, I’m going to get a higher education, and yet scary thoughts or thinking of lame relationships get me down…some memories or places trigger depression yet i havent been diagnosed…i guess i don’t need […]
No one know or want to have my pain but yet they judge me calle weired,fat,nerd girl,the girl whi cuts and burn,the girl who wears all black,etc.but they dont know why im fat or why i cut or why im weired and yet they seem to judge me judge the way i look the way i act.but they never once took the time out to ask me why, never wanted to know my story never even knowing me,why must this world be so judgmental so cruel so mean and soo ugly not even caring about no ones feel what that does to that […]
I the my family I see no porpuse for them.they say that they will be there for ou no matter what but that’s just a big lie…my families the worst my moms a stupid whore who hates her kids but got herself pregnant again.she isn’t a real mother all se does is verbally abuse us,I swear I don’t even consider her as my mother jut because I can’t be related to her,I just won’t except it I’m the only one sane in my house.my mons says I just look Luke my father that’s why I’m different from my sisters but I don’t care my dada […]
So I ran away yesterday only to come back three hours later.I ran away because my sorry excuse for a dad or as I say “that quy”wanted to fuck my mom and wow when I heard him tryna qet some It brouqht some horrible memories as a child hearinq that.It really toke a huqe toll In my life.Oh and I was molested when I was little so whenever I qet intimite with a qirl the memories of beinq touched comes back and sometimes I can’t qo threw It and end up lookinq like a little ***** In the eyes of the qirls.To be honest,I’d rather had […]
First time postinq.Spoke to my social worker yesterday.I told that I was qonna overdose so I can leave this corrupted world,I told her not to tell my mom but you know yall can’t trust adults.I was stupid enouqh to trust her and well I just went to the hospital in december for depression and suicidal ideation!,now I’m qoinq aqain!I stayed there for six days last time but my social worker says Ima stay there for about two weeks now.It’s not to bad tho exepct for the qroup,there ssssoooo borinq and the sleepinq at nine,dude I’m freakinq seventeen not six!…..I’ve been readinq alot of stories on […]
Yesterday was Horrible! It marked an All Time Low for Me. I had never woke up and immediately wanted to die. I guess i didnt want to face reality yesterday. That was the 1st time that I actively reached out to someone for help. Its like I wanted to Kill myself but I kept finding reasons to live. From the time I woke up at 7am until around 11pm or midnight, I seriously battled those feelings. It was a Great fight, and the best thing is that I Won; I’m still here. To some, i just did the right thing,but they dont understand the chemical […]
Hey,
I do not know what to say really. I’ve been on the brink of suicide for quite a while I am very anxious so you may get confused while reading. I have been on this site since last year, and I am depressed. I have little energy to live. Now do me one favor. Please do not write comments such as “oh, everything will be better, just wait and see.” If you want to comment, please in form of advice, I am sick of sympathy. So I have lived in an Arab country my entire life. Everything started in kindergarten. I was in a German kindergarten, and I use to bully […]
one night one night i had this dream .. the sky was dark and the whole worls was mean mommmy you where there but you went the same ..you had no money and you were insane i remember you spent everything we had on morphine…
you couldn’t pay the rent of a two bedroom so we shared our broken house with a couple of goons .. who sold drugs and where all cracked out they stayed in the living room sleeping on the couch ..
momy mom why rant you eating … im not hungry dear .now goodbye im leaving.. she walked out the door sometimes it […]
((sorry that this is song long… p.s i hav the tendency to write “have” as “hav” and “back” as “bac” and “you” as “yu”))
I’m new to this site. The fact that I found it by accident or fate I hav no clue yet. I might as well start writing because it seems that it does help at least from what friends hav told me to do. I’m taking their advice to figure things out and try to help myself through things that I do go through and think negatively about.
Where to begin… well I hav tried to commit suicide before by cutting and taking […]
Hi….I dont know may be whatever i am saying looks so stupid but i want to say.
After i lost my mom, the same month i met a girl on internet. Her Name is Muyasar. She was so beautiful and preety, Specially her eyes like a sweet cute angel. No one want to see tear in her eyes. As i start to talk i get know her heart is already broked. i was so confused which person who can make her heart break. She told how her bf not trusting her and always use bad words for her. I tried to make her understand if a guy […]
for about 9 or so years i had lived in a small judgmental town.. i was continuesly bullied.. to the piont where the only friend i had were the plenty of cuts on my arm… i thaught if people felf sorry for me maybe they would be nice.. stupidest mistake i ever made.. it only got worse.. i attempted cuicide and ended up in the hospital.. they all beleaved it was fake.. i went by emo, slut , cocksuking *****, druggie, crazi skitzofranic, and other.. i was suspended tree times of drug use ..and had stoped coming to school.. one day i was put in […]
Haven’t slept for 3 days and I have a feeling this might be the 4th.no ones except me and some kids in my class who was actually concerned about why I’m so tired all the time. Well the first 2 days were spent with me getting yelled at for falling asleep in class do today I decided that I wasn’t gonna get yelled at again,I drank an energy this morning and had a whole bunch of caffeine that kept me up and about all day but I was still out of it.i don’t know what I’m gonna do about tomorrow though just because I’m broke […]
Ok here we go…this all started when i was 11 years old and all of the sudden evrything in my life just crashed. Well my life was always messed up since the start i never lived with my father and always stood with my grandma until my mom found a guy and forced me to live with them but then when i was 11 this “great” guy my mom loved even more that herself or me i guess just decided to go away leaving my mom pregnant and paying for our new house and car, just left her alone we lost our car and almost […]
My suicide story isn’t base on a single dramatic occurrence or a series of bad hands dealt to me by life, like so many have posted concerning their suicide stories. Like many (if not all) here I have been dealing with deep depression, manic mood swings, and suicidal thoughts on a daily basis, that at times feels all consuming. Again, my path to suicide wasn’t due to a traumatic event but rather a fucking series of mundane, minutiae life events that have led me to deciding to off myself at the end of lackluster, Loserville 25 year bullshit life. All my life I haven’t amounted […]
I have been through it all. I lost my little brother at a really young age and then after losing him watched my whole family fall apart. My mom started drinking, my dad left our family and i was the main caretaker of my 1 year old sister as I was 7. I started craving attention so i would go find guys to say they loved me. Then one got me into pot. Not saying pot is bad. But it completely changed my life around. I didn’t give a fuck about my family or my friends. Just sneaking out seeing my boyfriend and smoking […]