They say that Depression is like this black hole that sucks at your soul, The things you love start to lose there color. Your Dreams cease to lose there luster. So Naturally when you are less then thrilled with existing in this dismal shit hole of an existence that our parents with not so much as a sideways glance thought about, the “Professionals” have a simple answer for this. To Medicate. To dull our minds so that in short, while it doesn’t really fix the Depression, it just makes us give less of a fuck about why we want to throw ourselves headfirst into the […]
I’m a really shitty person. I don’t feel like I’m salvagable at this point. There isn’t a future version of me that should be able to be happy. Some people really should just die, and I feel like I’m one of them.
I don’t want to die. But it feels right, to a part of me. By continuing to live, I’m resisting the recognition of who I really am, and what should happen to me. I’m making the world worse, just by continuing to be in it.
The thought of a world without me in it is appealing, even though I wouldn’t be around to enjoy it. […]
Look at her, look at him.
She’s an angel, cloaked in sin,
He’s the demon, yet clean within.
Look at her, look at him.
See the good, not the bad.
She’s broken inside,
He smiles with pride.
See the good, not the bad.
Believe the lies, not the truth.
She’s yearning for something true,
He’s the type that would only use you.
Believe the lies, not the truth.
Look at her, look at him.
She’s crying herself to sleep,
He’s a wolf clothed like a sheep.
Look at her, look at him.
See the good, not the bad.
She believed she could never be strong
He never told her […]
Its the end of the line for me Ive run out of time and bleed from my soul my heart has grown cold from the the things I have done singularity is me, alone, one.
This culmination of events is my ruination, my decent. Into darkness I fall as the devil calls. I will burn for this, I deserve this.
I told my parents that I wanted to kill myself today. They forced me to tell them why, it was hard telling them and to be honest I didn’t tell them the whole story. I don’t feel any different, I thought telling them would help but it didn’t. I still want to kill myself. They said we’d talk as a whole family tomorrow but I don’t. I’m really thinking about ending it tonight. I’m in to much pain here, maybe the other wprld will make me feel better.
Does anyone ever think that begging for help causes more depression. I know I didn’t; or rather, I didn’t want to accept.
Hell is not the place we go when we die, it is where we are right now, the reason why this website is in front of us.
“He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And when you gaze long into an abyss the abyss also gazes into you.” -Nietzsche.
I have recently finished Ayn Rand’s The Fountainhead and I feel a great disturbance, now, as I partly felt before, when people say “I won’t judge” or “It […]
this is the truth for all
God of this Universe is the one that is Accountable for the ENTIRE HUMAN RACE ON THIS GOD”S EARTH
we are NOT GUILTY OF NOTHING… MANKIND RACE IS SO NOT GUILTY … GODS ENERGY IS THE ONE THAT DID IT TO ALL OF US HERE. so if you commit sucide do not worry about nothing. One day I will be their also and I know for a fact that this Energy God knows who did what!!! ENERGY GOD DID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
if NOT for this Energy God NONE of us would Never have such a Evil Negative Life on this earth […]
They all seem to know who
I am supposed to be, not
So clear is it to me
How easily I fell, grasping
On to rancid ideals, leaving
Just whisps of my self. Believing
Their foolish words, imposed, freakish tones
Opened me up to the bones that bore Truth,
And that All, allowing me to be
So grim. Were the lessons learned?
Nothing left but to give thanks
For a life I could not live with
My self in their world, or any.
I’m sorry.
Life is not fair.
Life is unfair.
there is always winners & losers.
there will always be winner & loser.
so why can’t I / losers just commit suicide?
rather than they keep living chasing & fixing all their way too many losses, which is probably too late anyway too.
and usually losers can’t win / can never win against winners anyway .. even the “start” is already too late!!
This is the harsh truth / fact / reality .
Reality / Real life / Real world is very LIMITING / LIMITED in what we can & can’t do !
We are limited by money […]
Truth is…
I was never good enough. I could never grasp that as a kid, so I kept searching. I kept trying to find somewhere I could be useful, somewhere safe… but the truth is that when you’re a woman, you’re nothing, if not a whore. When you’re black, you’re nothing, if not an animal. If you’re gay, you’re nothing, if not an abomination.
Abused, kidnapped, raped, molested, cast aside. Made to endure hard labor for less than minimum wage. Get hurt, get fired. The world doesn’t honor or respect someone like me. my people being killed and then blamed for […]
When my parents, friends or random people ask me about my day, all I’ll do is say “It was fine.”
It wasn’t.
Not a day passes that I don’t feel useless, hateful and sad. Not a single day.
My days are never ‘fine’. They’re far from it.
I spend every single day of mine, hurting myself and wishing it would end. It doesn’t, but wanting it is the only thing I still have strength for.
Every single day I would come home from school, throw up that little piece of beagle I ate instead of my breakfast, go to my room and lock the doors.
Every day I would take my […]
There’s something inside of me, I’m considered a dead man. I’m alive now, but i’ll try, again and again, and again. Because I can not stop. I’ve been completely consumed by this. I hate, everything. I’ve learned to hate myself, and now I can’t take that back. I ruined my life, numerous times, and I’ll continue to do so. It’s as if I no longer control my body. I’ll try again. Till I am no more. Considering that, I’m already dead. It hasn’t happened yet, and it’ll happen again.
What is a smile? I think it goes without saying that people define a smile in different ways. Some say a smile is a way to tie everything together. Some say a smile is the glue that keeps you together when you are falling apart. Still others say a smile is a way to reassure people around you that you are doing fine.
But..
What if I said that for me, a smile is a way of hiding?
A way of hiding what I really feel from those around me?
A way of hiding from the sadness that is just lingering beneath the surface?
Because […]
I am not a warrior, my spirit of warlock
I am hell’s child, the evolution of damned
I am one, with the underworld
The horsemen, his blood
The eternal, is my truth
Truth and reality
The grip is forever
Explode my body like a star because I need to die the most
I need to, now
The desolated sands
The balance of ‘Heaven and Hell’
Help me to die in peace
How am I gonna make it.
You are at an unmarked intersection … one way is the City of Lies and another way is the City of Truth. Citizens of the City of Lies always lie. Citizens of the City of Truth always tell the truth. A citizen of one of those cities (you don’t know which) is at the intersection. What question could you ask him to find the way to the City of Truth? (you can ask only one question)
I don’t think I’ll ever know when to walk away from life, it’ll be more of a spur of the moment, angry and impulsive act. I am worth less than nothing. You know the kind of person you’d accuse your friend of being to offend them (“you’re a fucking idiot / ugly bastard / freak / no dick / boring / loser”). I’m every single one of those things and it’s not just self-loathing, it’s the truth. I am literally retarded and everything else that’s bad. I’m a walking joke. The incredible thing is that despite knowing this and the amount of pain I’ve been through […]
my soul is broken. I’m so lost. The voices inside my head won’t rest. My tears shed like rain. The storm is wild and cannot be contained. My heart is full of so much pain. I want it all to end. My life is worthless, I am worthless. God why did you create me? Why am I here? Everyday I hope and pray to be taken from this world. 4 suicide attempts all failed. I can’t even kill myself right. My last wish is to leave this world in peace no pain. I’ve had enough, I’m choking on my thoughts. I am lost!!! Help someone […]
Hello all,
I’ve never posted on this site before, but I felt the need to make an account and make one. Â To all that is reading this; to all that feels like no one is there; to all that has contemplated life over and over again and feels the need to end things; to anyone that just needs to share their feelings to… I’m here. Â I have felt what rock bottom feels like and I have been in and out of depression, contemplating suicide a few times in my life. Â I will keep this short and sweet: Â the pain may seem never-ending, but it eventually DOES […]
I know what you’re thinking. ‘It’s another girl trying to stop us from thinking about suicide’. ‘Nothing she’s going to say is going to stop me’. You’re right. There is nothing I can say or do to stop you from this. I don’t know what you’ve all been through; I definitely have no right to tell you that you shouldn’t commit suicide. But what I can tell you is that you’re not crazy. You’re not exaggerating. But most of all, you’re not alone. You’re probably thinking, ‘I’ve heard all this, there’s no point, she doesn’t understand’. You’re right, I don’t understand. But there is something […]
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