To my father:
I’m sorry I wasn’t good enough. I love you.
To my mother:
I’m sorry I couldn’t your get acceptance.
To my sisters:
You are absolutely strong. Great mothers to your children. One day you will all make the man who chooses you very happy.
To my brother:
My closest friend. My confidante. The bond between us is something that can’t be broken. I will miss you brother.
To my daughter:
I love you. I wish more than anything that has ever been or ever will be how much you mean to me. You are my miracle. A promise to you that I would never stop being here for you. One day you will understand. Hopefully. I’ve not got to hold you in 4 long and baneful months. Much longer than I could have imagined. I’ve not got to tell you good morning, or good night for a month. This is pain that I can’t even start to describe or deal with anymore.
To my love and my heart:
I will always love you pebbles. I have since the first time I seen you. The first kiss. I’ve been trying to show you how much you mean to me. How much of a better person I am with you. You and our daughter gave my life reason.
I CAN’T FACE THE DARK WITHOUT YOU
2 comments
Thank you for sharing this with me. I’m unsure what to say. I can’t stop you from doing this if that is your intention. I will say don’t. Please try walking forward. It is hard, and it doesn’t get better. It does get different and tolerable though.
i have a daughter and son…and love them and have been changed by them as you express for your daughter…they are the only things that kept me going these past 10 years…last month i lost complete custody of them…and every moment i don’t get to be near them is more pain than i can take…i am terrified of what taking my self away might do to them…i’ve had friends with a parent who killed themselves…they never get over it…whatever you decide to do…don’t let go of your love for her…faery wishes to you…