Just a couple of days ago I realized I was asexual and since I’ve been quite happy.
I’ve always been disgusted by sex and was never really attracted to anyone and knowing what I am gives me a sense of contentment.
The only thing that’s bothering me is my friends and girlfriend dont seem to understand…
I still love my girlfriend, and I’ll be able to love other people, I just don’t want anything to do with sex.
I still want to get married and adopt children, but they don’t understand.
I’m also afraid that when I tell my parents they’ll treat treat me like […]
Stories of Hope
On the lighter note of my life, I think I may have found some sort of purpose, or at least something to get my mind off my problems. It fills my time up.
Writing.
I’ve been writing for a while now, and I think I’m pretty good at it. I’ve posted some stories on Wattpad, and while they’re not very popular, they’re getting there. I try to write kind of up beat stories, but most just end up sad. It’s great therapy in my opinion. Instead of focusing on how much my life sucks, or how much I need a drug, I’m writing.
So far, after a slip […]
Just message me if your looking for a reason not to kill/ hurt yourself.
Am I wrong for saying if people want to hurt/ kill themselves it’s okay? o – o
Like I understand if your crying out for help and want to change that’s okay, and I’ll even try to help.
Because if you were really going to kill yourself you wouldn’t say anything… or at least I wouldn’t…
Any ways It wouldn’t matter what people say.. but if your really trying and looking for a reason not to do it message me on my email and I’ll talk to you I will be there for you.
Sorry to the people that will be & were, Â “Butt-Hurt.” By my thoughts.
If you are […]
I have been through a lot but mainly it’s been all in my head but I’m proud that I’m here still, alive and fighting! Each day is a struggle but there are moments in each day that I am thankful to have been their to experience it. Hope is that glimmer of light in the dark tunnel, that peace of mind that you get once in a while and most importantly “tomorrow”. I’ve cried myself to sleep most nights and I’ve even had no sleep once but through it all I was just happy to be alive. Pain is a good thing because it means […]
I go to bed, and know i’m going to lie there crying, hoping that i was dead, because the truth is? Nobody cares, i get treated like im invisible, i’m not there, because everybody would prefer it that way, i’m ugly, annoying, and i just sit there there and act like i’m not there, i go through everyday hoping that when i go to sleep that night? Everything will be different, that i won’t want to be dead, that i will go to sleep happy, not caring about what people think about me, how do people have that self confidence? How do people go everyday […]
On may 30th, I swallowed 80 Tylenol pills. Beforehand I hadn’t done enough research on whether that would kill you or not but I thought it surely would. About 20 minutes after my mom came to my room to check in on me because she knew I was suffering from depression for over a year. At that point I was very sad and bawling. I thought that was the end. My mom started to hug me and asked me if I wanted to go out and what was wrong and I immediately shooed her away I didn’t want her there because I love her dearly […]
I don’t really talk much about my suicide attempt but when I do, I get choked up and cry. She didn’t know much about it but today, at her house she happened to be looking through my blog and read what I wrote on my day back from the hospital. I couldn’t even look at her. She held me as I cried, and she did nothing but hold me for a while. I don’t know how she does it. How she can be around me, someone so broken and torn between life and death all the time, and still manage to fucking smile. How she […]
Trying to kill myself was the best thing that could’ve happened. Because if I hadn’t tried to and if I hadn’t failed, I wouldn’t feel the urge to change how I felt and I wouldn’t have gone to Four Winds. It was tricky, I had just enough of the Nortatryptaline to go into coma but I just ended sleeping for a straight 48 hours. I then didn’t leave my house for an entire week and was drinking so much, I decided physical pain would have been the answer to everything. I cut the word help into my arm and cried myself to sleep that night. […]
I noticed quite a lot of people post about how they should commit suicide…and quite a lot of people try to stop them.
I have mixed feelings about this actually. I think it’s stupid you’re asking suicidal people how to kill yourself. This website isn’t here to HELP US commit suicide it’s here to PREVENT US from it.
But at the same time I understand. I mean some people are too far gone and it’s their time, and theres nothing we can do about it. Some suicidal people don’t want help and maybe you shouldn’t shove it in their faces. Some of these people have probably heard […]
This is my second post. today hadn’t been that good. I’ve been floating in and out of sadness and depression. I’ve begun considering going to see a psychiatrist for my problems; hopefully they’ll be able to answer some of my questions because… I don’t understand this…
Each night I go to sleep, hoping I won’t wake up. During the night I wake and watch the shadows drift around me and beg God to never let it end, to just let those shadows stay forever and take me away into the darkness. Then when the sun rises I’m still breathing and I curse my own being. Getting […]
I’ve only been on here for a few days but I already feel at home here.
I don’t know most of you, but I consider each and everyone of you as family.
In our family we’re accepted no matter how weird we are. We’re here for each other no matter what. No matter what your problem is there are people here who understand and who want to help. I really admire that in us.
We might all be broken and on the verge of death, but that’s okay. We’re all here to be repaired and to try and strive for the best.
You’re not alone in this world.
This website […]
So…I’ve got a lot of mental problems, but that hasn’t stopped me from helping out other people with problems. My friend asked me something the other day that got me thinking…
What gives me, a person with too many problems to count, the right to tell people what to do about their own problems?
My argument was that, no I don’t have a right. But who on the internet does?
I may not be qualified, but I’m suffering through this for a reason. And that reason is to help others with the same problems.
I haven’t overcome my problems because I don’t want help. I’m too far gone for […]
This is the first time I’ve ever publically posted/said that I am in as much pain as I am. I’ve hidden it for years, even when I was a young teen. When I was little I thought everybody had bad days like mine: times when the world looked grey, when even speaking was difficult, when my soul felt sucked from me. I’m too afraid to truly come out and tell anyone around me how I really feel. They’ll all just say “Just put on a smile and look on the bright side” or “It’ll be okay, just buck up”. Can’t anyone see that I can’t […]
This is my story from the start http://suicideproject.org/2013/07/my-story-161/ please reaad that first before continuing down so you will understand the bits that i’ve missed out.
So you have read the beginnings and the main depth of what happened in my child/teen life. Heres some that i have missed out like my eating disorder , suicide attempt and the visions and self harm.
Im going to start off with the visions i get when i have anxiety attacks or panic attacks i haven’t told anyone what i hear, see or feeling during these episodes. Not even my psychiatrist. Well i get flash backs of the that night i got […]
I can’t exactly say when it started because I don’t know, my life has just been full of bad events snowballing until I finally released it all.
From a very young age I felt alienated from everyone, I felt that nobody was like me.
It didn’t help that I had a young mother, she had me at 14, Â because I felt that she wasn’t approachable. Also, she was often getting into new relationships which involved a lot of men. I found it very hard ad still find it very hard, to connect with new people so this was an issue for the first 5 years of my […]
Well, I don’t know how to exactly go about this. I’ve never told exactly what happened to me to a lot of people….but I guess I can start now. This may be long to some people and for that, I am sorry. If you don’t want a sad story about a dying girl, I would move on. Well….here we go.
I was raised in a small town in the midwest. I’ve gone to the same schools my whole life. My life was good. Everyone’s is for awhile. Then, something changed. 6th grade changed everything.
I had always been bullied. By a girl here and there, a boy […]
I have been battling depression since I was 12. In the beginning, people dismissed it easily. My parents thought I was just a “moody teenager”. I got used to simply distracting myself, locking myself in my room, listening to music, reading books and writing poetry as a release, almost like every other teenager it seemed, so I guess you could not really blame them for not noticing. The main difference between me and most of my peers from school was that I had self-harm thoughts at least since I was 14. When I was 13 I witnessed my cousin’s abuse (mainly emotional but […]
There r so many things in my life i regret. i just dont seem to ever say or do the right things like what i do is never good enough. alot of the time it makes me feel like a fuck up like i just cant get my shit together but it always comforts me to kno that one day i will b able to leave and just live away from everyone. I feel that as ive gotten older i just suck at relationships. Its not anyone elses fault im truly just an asshole. Idk i just wish that i didnt hav to worry about […]
This site has really helped me overcome my pain and suffering. I first joined on December 2012.
Currently I am officially free from depression and suicidal thoughts.
I will never, never forget all of you who were there during my darkest times to motivate me here on SP: (I don’t know whether you are reading this or not)
Amakua
Rocketman
RuinsOfTheVoid
SadBk
Dawg
And many many others!
Lastly, for B.N.Crazy, whose quote really opened my eyes: “no ones holding a gun to your head and saying i have to feel that way, so why am i?†This quote was the beginning of my decision to fight.
Thank you SP, this is the place I feel […]
I’ve wanted to commit suicide for quite awhile now….
But theres something always holding me back from succeeding. I couldn’t figure out what for weeks until I saw this quote that I cant remember who its from. “Dont give up, because somehow, someone, somewhere will need you.”
It clicked.
Ive always had a knack for making people feel better. I like cracking jokes, giving good advice, and comfort when its needed.
It finally clicked when I realized…I’m going to save someone. I know that might not happen, but it keeps me from thinking about suicide. Someone, somewhere is going to need me.
And I’m going to be there for them.
“Don’t […]