Suicidal Survivors

For those who have survived suicide.

1

I Cant Go On Anymore!

  June 3rd, 2018 by Icantgoonanymore37

I can’t go on anymore! I feel I’ve reached the end of my road! I’m sitting here all alone wondering where it all went wrong.

37 years old and I feel so Worthless & Totally fed up with life! I just don’t see the point anymore! Why do I still continue to try, when it gets me Absolutely No where!! Everyday is So Freaking hard, & I’m still struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel! Why you ask? Well, the last 37 years of my life have been absolute hell here on earth! I don’t have anything left inside. I pray for …

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8

My worst nightmare about to come true

  June 1st, 2018 by brokenmom

9 years ago I attempted suicide by overdosing was found unconcious 2 days later and woke up in hospital,then transferred to a mental health facility for 2 days .I guess they let mr out because I didnt have insurance,it was an impulsive attempt, Im a 56 yr old female now ,lost my job and am about to become homeless on tuesday, the old thoughts have come back ,im terrified of becoming homeless and all I can think of is ending it now,im afraid to fail at this again, but i feel i have no way out of this mess.

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3

I just want to be free again

  June 1st, 2018 by Cotton candy whispers

In January I tried to end it all. I’m in love with a man who I can never be with, he plays on my emotions and makes me obsessively crazy. It’s a power trip for him and I’ve never been more in love with anyone. I lost my well paying job due to depression and not being able to preform at work any longer. I’m married to a man who I don’t love, we are roommates that split bills and I desperately want out

The day I decided to leave, I took handfuls of pills until I blacked out. It was quiet and dark and I …

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5

Pills

  May 31st, 2018 by unknownhuman

I tried to attempt suicide this night. But it didn’t work. I feel sick now and I don’t really feel anything but pain in my stomach. I can’t walk at all without bumping into stuff. I don’t want to tell my mom but I have to. I am afraid that she will get mad.

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7

Two years ago I tried to kill myself. I’ve never told anyone the whole story.

  May 30th, 2018 by skyofAuroras

Two years ago today, I ran away from home to attempt suicide. I left my house at 4:30am and walked to a dried up riverbed outside of town. The sun was coming up when I got there. I wrote in my journal for what I thought would be the last time. Then I slit my wrists. I had used that blade many times before so it was too dull. The cuts were nowhere deep or long enough. I underestimated how painful cutting directly into the vein would be.

I was disappointed, but then I went completely numb. I was nothing. I knew I needed help, so …

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3

I wanna give up

I wanna give up

  May 29th, 2018 by unicornkitty20

I just want to give up.. I tried killing myself a couple weeks ago but my bf took me to the hospital and they saved me. I just want it all to end! I’m so done with this place !! The only thing keeping me here today is my 2 precious kittens. I don’t know what to do..

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0

My story in short (it’s good to be alive)

  May 19th, 2018 by lightdoescome

For the purpose of time I will try not to drag this out or go overly into detail, although with in each part of my story their are days and weeks I could divulge into, tearing apart the brutality of living and why ultimately I am now happy to live. Light does come, light will come, please let this be an aid of hope.

I grew up in a ‘broken home’ as you could say, both my parents were around through my childhood though it did more harm than good. They fought a lot and had a lot of their own ‘issues’, school was never much …

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3

My Experience with Borderline Personality Disorder

  May 15th, 2018 by sisterofnight

Hey. For starters, I’m 18. As soon as I turned 18 I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. It’s the youngest you can be with this diagnosis. I grew up in a stable house hold, with stable parents, and 2 stable older brothers. Where the hell I came from is beyond me. From an early age I showed signs of isolation and poor self esteem. In the 6th grade I wrote a letter regarding how depressed I was to my teacher. No action was taken.

Even as I type this, I feel no attachment to my past. I feel no connection to the daily self harm …

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2

DEATH SOMETIMES WALKS ON PADDED FEET

  May 5th, 2018 by s.h45@yahoo.com

 

When death is so near, sometimes it walks on padded feet, strumming the ground like a guitarist, rhythmically – louder – softer, then with fingers on the wood, tap, tap… tap, tap. The sound is everywhere, no one can hear it but the poor fuck.   It builds and then suddenly subsides, then as each pebble of doubt and every dark word is cast into the waters of his mind, the song builds again on each ripple.   Inside his head each wave combines with the last, getting larger and larger. With the sound of the pebbles dropping into the water, cast by each tap, tap… tap, …

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1

And I’ll go to work, and I’ll go to sleep, and all of the littler things…

  April 28th, 2018 by Triste Foi

A year ago I was convinced I was getting better, that I would never be back to write my pain… It lasted quite a while, enough to trick me into genuinely believing it. The sad truth is that I won’t be able to have the hope I thought I had. Perhaps without a really good year I would have been better off, I would have never envisioned a future with happiness for myself – and now that makes it harder for me to feel this way.
I wish I hadn’t failed last year I wish I was dead I feel so incurably sad …

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31

Failed Attempt leading to another

  April 28th, 2018 by Pained

I attempted where i configured a ratchet strap around my neck.. with my hoodie up to pad my neck tied in the front. I was confident this would work in the outcome of killing me.. this was my very first true real attempt without coming out with any physical or mental injury’s. I remember pacing in and out the room trying to gain confindence to pull it off because i was getting Anxiety on how dark this all was… pushing forward i was ratcheting to tighten and un ratcheting to losen every time i thought i was about to Lose consciousness and the thought while …

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1

Nov 5th, 2016

  April 21st, 2018 by ELECTRICAT

I didn’t know how and why it happen, we were fine before but without me realising he distances himself from me. I can’t even remember what we were arguing about sometimes because he wasn’t happy with whatever i do or say, he will say i am wrong, selfish, slut, ***** and i begged him to stay everytime. Even if it wasn’t my fault i just took the blame and this has been going on for 7 months, i missed him everyday wishing that he will see me as myself.

I made a mistake that he can’t seem to forgive me and he seeks revenge, he made …

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2

Since 2014

  April 15th, 2018 by sbkstep43

Hi Friends (old or new)

So, I have not posted on here in over four years (kinda) when I was leaving sixth form. A lot has happened and  a lot of changes. So get ready for a long update (SORRY LOVES).

  1. Started and stopped therapy
  2. Was on antipsychotics (and stopped them because of side effects)
  3. Was diagnosed with ASD with Social anxiety and Depression
  4. Took gap years from school and started writing a series (maybe one day, I come back and tell you guys I am a published writer (dreams))
  5. Got engaged again but it didnt last (sadly, I really loved her)
  6. Had a boyfriend and

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5

Reality is boring ! Real life is boring ! Real world is boring ! Humanity/Mankind must move beyond money & politics for real progress !

  April 14th, 2018 by niki

Reality is boring, Humanity/Mankind must move beyond money & politics for real progress.

Although technology have been progressing rapidly nowadays, yet sadly in many aspects, Humanity/Mankind/Society still have slow progress; Everyday is still the same day & problems over and over again repeatedly.

I believe that in order to make a real progress for Humanity / Mankind, we must quickly focus & do the followings:

1) We must move beyond money & politics. It is outdated. A lot of problems in this world today basically stems from these two root causes (& also superstitions especially in religion, as well as in Ignorance & Stupidity due to failure in …

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2

Last few months, that thing I have heard from people who care about me.

  April 10th, 2018 by Jean-bean102

Last few months, that thing I have heard from people who care about me.

“Sometimes It takes a loss to gain something beautiful to your life.”

“You are like a vine or plant that are trying to grow and your ex-friend is a brick block your way out and weight you down…You have made so much of a process and she didn’t let herself to move one and grow from it. You are on right path. ”

“You are so sweet person with a good soul. Yes, we all make mistake and that makes us human. I have lived with an abuser for 6 years and you are not …

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0

Update

  April 3rd, 2018 by Eccedentesiastsoul

It’s been a while since I’ve last been on here. As a matter of fact, it has been a while since I’ve confronted myself about what is going on around me. For the most part, I blame it on school. I have loads of work to do and having to balance it while also dealing with my parent’s bullshit takes up all my time. I guess part of the reason I have not been putting anything on here is also because I fear someone finding out that this account belongs to me. Anyways, things have been all over the place. I have relapsed twice last …

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1

They ask

  March 31st, 2018 by Rosesareblue

They asked me.

“Why do you cut yourself?”

They asked me.

“Why are there scars in your body?”

They asked me.

“Are you crazy?”

They told me.

“Attention seeker at its finest.”

And i sighed. Breathed heavily and walked away.

Whats the good in telling them what my demons tell me what to do, it’s better to keep my insanity to myself.

Because it’s better keeping everything inside rather than telling the world who doesn’t know how to listen.

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2

Thoughts and Feelings

  March 27th, 2018 by ClearlyitsDiz

Do you ever have a really intense thought that u desperately want to let out, but the one person you trust the most is the person that the thought will personally effect, so you have no choice but to hold it in and let it eat away your mentality until you’re stuck sitting there at ridiculously late hours wondering the point of anything? I’m so exhausted of living a lie that I’m forced to live instead of letting out the truth. I want so much from life but who am I kidding? I’m never going have anything, I’m never going to amount to

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2

Tragedy

  March 23rd, 2018 by ClearlyitsDiz

The world is silent; my heavy breathing is the only noise in the world… it feels weird. Almost like death is watching me, or like there’s something awful going on. Although there’s literally no noise, and no person in sight… I feel really alone and endangered. Maybe I’m just uneased, maybe I’m psycho, or maybe I’m lonely. I feel like god has abandoned us, because miracles and humanity no longer exist. All that’s left is pain, death, shattered attempts at love and the dried soil beneath our feet to remind us of the past we’ve lived; the history we’ve created. Whats happened to the

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0

Remain calm…

  March 23rd, 2018 by ClearlyitsDiz

I feel like every inhale I take is just steady preparation for the depression and anxiety and psychosis that’s coming when its time to exhale. I feel like every inhale I take is the last, like it’s the final breath before someone breaks in and kills me, before the whole world collapses around me and everything fades to black, and I become paralysed with numbness, slowly loosing sanity as I fall into deep delusion that everyone’s coming for me. I try to handle it, or hide from it if I’m being perfectly honest, but what happens when I stop hiding? When I finally

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