Suicidal Survivors

For those who have survived suicide.


This is where my life ends, Tonight

July 29th, 2016by Sach77

I’ve been on this site for a awhile now, but I just created an account and I guess this is where I’ll send my goodbyes to the world…

The past three days I was supposed to commit suicide. It ended up not happening, it almost did last night but my boyfriend ended up just talking to me like usual and I felt guilty for going to leave and have our last conversation be so boring. the two days before that I had set every detail in place, I’ve cleaned my room to the T and printed out all my suicide letters. I finished a lot of …

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You are loved

July 25th, 2016by honoringtrent

This is my first post, though I’ve perused many over the past few months. I have found a lot of comfort here, but have also felt so much despair seeing so much pain put into words.

You see, I was shocked and blindsided by the loss of my husband, the father of my children, my life partner for 11 years, my best friend, to suicide on June 13, 2015.

I plan to post more at a later time, but felt incredibly compelled to post this now…. You are loved.

I don’t know you and you don’t know me, but I hope you read this (yes, I’m talking to …

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Life after Hell is possible

July 18th, 2016by pinkcoconut

Hi all.
Just remembered about this place in a melancholy moment.
I’m doing ok. Was very suicidal for a few hellish months a year and a half ago.
I’m not suicidal now. I think about self harm occasionally, but I manage it – I don’t act on it – I do something else, like arrange to see a friend. That used to sound stupid or unthinkably difficult, but I’ve done lots of training of myself to get to a place where I’ve got habits.
My life is not perfect and I did have a shitty start in some ways, but in others, my world is amazing and I’m incredibly …

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I think I’m going under…

July 15th, 2016by xashlerzx

I need help… I need to feel something again other than pain and sadness and heavy hearted. I’m falling apart and no one notices anymore because apparently I’ve been become too good at hiding. Ironic really that the only thing I’m good at anymore is hiding how I really feel. 22 years of doing it though, I better be fucking good at SOMETHING.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me… Why can’t I ever enter into a relationship where I’m not used, betrayed, or abused? Why can’t I feel happiness again, but REALLY feel it? I smile at my loved ones, I

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July 14th, 2016by CARLOSPEJUAN

I feel tired. And it’s no loner a lethargic exhaustion. It is no longer a physical over exhertion due to the lack of calories. I just am tired of everything. I am tired of being the wierdo in my family, friends, at work, and everywhere I go. I am tired of trying to make everyone laugh and happy, and then being called annoying and a fag. I am tired of doing things for people that have and will never be retured. I am tired of people hating me, for being slower than them. I am tired of not being able to unlock my full potential …

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I want to to tell people my story, hopefully it helps someone find hope

July 14th, 2016by JamalK02

So, I used to be a lowkey, small time drug dealer in the biggest city on the east coast. I’ve lived in the hood all my life and who I am is simply a product of my environment. One of my first drug deals was to some tall white kid who wanted a dub of weed. I could tell he didn’t do this often, he used as much slang as he could and even tried to sound “black”. The problem was that this kid wanted to meet at a train station and i didn’t have my metrocard. I hopped the turnstile to get to him. …

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I’m lost

July 12th, 2016by poetn.url

Hey, I’m a girl, to be perfectly honest I’ve tried everything on getting better at doing life and all I end up is putting myself into hospital and hurting people around me. Yes I want to die. And yes I wil. One day. I’ve ended up here seeking help, so who knows I wanna find […]


the first time.

July 7th, 2016by catsnap24

15 years old. in the middle of another scorching summer there was a heavy weight over my head. something dark pulling me under. i had soon seemed to notice how i didn’t want to do anything anymore and i didn’t know why. i myself at the time had a girlfriend, a best friend, and a few other friends a sibling and 2 parents. but as some people know its not because of them. i was always quiet when you first met me, it was till along time when i would finally shine for the true energetic person i am.  but that year i had chosen …


I Feel Depression Coming Back

July 1st, 2016by GerbzBaby


( Inspired by the beautiful animated films by Miyazaki. I present a drawing of Totoro and Catbus! Enjoy<3)

I’ve been happy or.. At least carefree for a while even though I barely had any communication with anyone for the past months.. I started to feel strong, like I could do anything and honestly not give a sh*t about what people think.. But all of a sudden i feel my depression creeping back up on me. I’m scared. I don’t want to feel depressed anymore. I WANT TO BE HAPPY. But how can I be happy when I have …


Four years ago today !!!!!

June 29th, 2016by noneedforaname

Hello to old friends and new. As you can see im not dead or in prison which i guess is a good thing. ( depending who you ask ) i haven’t been on in awhile, trying to be strong for eveybody else lmao. Anyways i do pop in to read post now and then but had to post today. Like many people, this is my vent. I get a lot of good advice, kind words, and a whole lotta ” shit ” off my chest. Its been 4 years today that GOD took my oldest son. He was 21 …


Is it my fate? (part 2)

June 27th, 2016by Gypsyguy93

In my last post I talked about my ex-fiancee (gay male) who committed suicide after we broke up four years ago, I think if he knew how much it would hurt those he loved and left behind he never would of done it, but then I also understand that the pain he was going through in his mind was intolerable to him and he just wanted the pain to end…

I didn’t know my ex was suicidal, we had been together for a couple of years, I know he had PTSD and Anxiety, but I never knew about the depression…. before we broke up he cheated …


First time on here..

June 26th, 2016by Tin_Cup


Y’all can call me Tin if you’d like.

My story and why I’m here?

Well, I was a victim of a very violent form of abuse. My father, a drunk sadistic bastard, would beat my brothers and I. Though I was left without an escape my brothers could run to school, as I was only 4 through 8 at the time.

My mother was framed for abusing us when we were young. I was 3, and my brothers were 4 and 7. Our church were the ones who framed her, and lied to DCFS which led to our being taken away from her.

I suffer from a form of PTSD, sort …


rewind for the weekend

June 24th, 2016by forward

weekend, more like a week now, that i have been in the same mood, state and motivational skill as i did last month when i swallowed pills to kill myself.

i dont know whats going on.

ive been a victim of depression, anxiety, PTSD and SAD for 2 years now, and yet i still have times where i dont know how to fight it.

i want to tell you that i will survive but i feel id be lying.

this week, the week after fathers day is the worst relapse ive had in a long time. I’m barely eating, barely drinking, not sleeping, im cutting again, im smoking way …


Suicidal and Confused

June 22nd, 2016by snugglepuff

Well, I never thought I would post something like this and honestly its kind of weird but what the hell. As I type this my husband is sleeping next to me, and has no care in the world. Me on the other hand, I carry the weight of all of the care and pain. This is my story.

I am 24 years old, and I currently do not see even a glimpse of a promising happy future. It weird because I am in college and successful at it; I’m smart,have tons of motivation, and can light up a room. But, just as much as I can …


Seeing the Demons

June 18th, 2016by xmwdhx

This is my story to tell and the story you should know.

Janaury of 2013, I was a suicidal trans male. I suffered depression almost 3 1/2 years. It’s very long time than you all expected. I was hurt, scared, tired, lost, abandoned, and many words I should describe myself of being sad. Every day during my middle school year and the year of my 7th grade, people treated me like an animal or a beast. I was beaten up by bunch of kids especially middle and high school boys. I was known as a freak, emo freak, tranny freak, or boy freak. I couldn’t stand …


People Are causing Me To suffer

June 13th, 2016by GerbzBaby


(A mini drawing I drew to help calm my nasty thoughts :/ )


All my friends and family are unsupportive and them not being here for me is causing me to suffer. Day after day after day all I think about is suicide but.. I’m to much of a chicken to fucking do it. I want to live but then again I want to die.. In the least painful way.. I’ve been waiting for so long to find those friends who finally care.. The day my family finally realizes I have a problem and I need their …


I’ve unblocked my posts

June 13th, 2016by LittleBead

I am convinced that I hold a very personal and unique legacy which is enclosed within the structure of my posts. By telling you about it, I want to inform you that I have unblocked all of my posts, if you were interested in things which had brought me to this website. They include, but are not limited to, the time before my suicide and the time when I was at the psychiatric hospital. I believe that my experience, sometimes positive experience, will help you deal with your own situations and personal issues. I found a few ways to go through my inner struggles and …


“You’re So Much Better Than That.” —Cassie, Suicide Survivor

June 7th, 2016by HERE4UOK


Please reconsider. If you can’t find motivation, it’s not because there aren’t reasons out there, out here. It’s because your state of mind blocks your view and your spirit from seeing ahead. And it’s ok, remember: IT’S OK TO NOT BE OK, as long as you ask for help.

I, unfortunately, am no genie. But like most of us here, I have my past. I have my experiences, and with all due respect, unless you’re terminally ill, you have every chance at witnessing how things really DO get better, but you need to do your part too. Help others help you.

Things most likely didn’t get bad …


“I Didn’t Want To Die, But I Felt That I Had To…” —Kevin Hines, Suicide Survivor

  SeeSmith on another post here on SP said it well: “You are the LEAST qualified person to judge yourself [when you are in an ill state of mind]”. Don’t make the mistake of thinking for others, don’t assume you’re a burden or that others are just too “busy with their own lives” to care […]


Don’t Be Sorry for Struggling. We All Do at Some Point. It’s NOT Wrong Asking for Help, Not Doing So Is..!

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