Suicidal Survivors

For those who have survived suicide.

4

I hate reality ! reality is boring ! Doctor Strange , Marvel MCU , Avengers , Sword Art Online , Virtual Reality , games , movies , novels , anime manga , comics is better than reality !

  October 29th, 2016 by niki

I hate reality ! reality is boring !

Doctor Strange is better than reality !
Marvel MCU (Marvel Cinematic Universe) is better than reality !
Avengers is better than real world !
Sword Art Online is better than real life !
Virtual Reality is better than boring reality !
video games is better than reality real life real world !
movies is better than real-world real-life reality !
novels is better than real-life real-world reality !
anime manga is better than boring real life real world reality !
comics is better than boring real world real life reality !

Why Human’s Imagination is much better than reality ??
movies , games …

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6

Missing Suicidal Thoughts

  October 20th, 2016 by conflictedcollegekid

In May, I tried overdosing. Well, it obviously didn’t work. I ended up being sent to a psych hospital for 11 days. Then I did a partial hospitalization program for 3 weeks, and then did an intensive outpatient program for 5 weeks. During that time, I quit self harming, quit abusing prescription drugs, and quit having suicidal thoughts.

It’s been 5.5 months since I first wound up in my inpatient place. But now that I’m “healed” or whatever the hell you want to call it….I feel weird. And I don’t like it. For whatever reason, I miss being how I used to be. I miss being …

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1

Message to kissy_93

  October 10th, 2016 by RuinsOfTheVoid

I have seen you pop up in the community in the last few days and I just want to say you are not alone. Everyone on this site knows what its like to hurt. You are not alone.

You keep asking for a reason to live, but life is not that simple. There are things in my life that I love and cherish and things I give no value to. I love my GF and my laptop, I don’t love my clothes, if I lose them I can just get more clothes. I cannot replace my GF. So she gives my life meaning, I fight everyday …

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0

My first attempt…

  October 9th, 2016 by starrynights14

I hated how my community view suicide as an cowardly, attention seeking and impulsive act. At least when I tried that several years ago, it wasn’t anything like that.

It’s a long story if you want me to talk about what lead to my attempt. My life has been absolutely exhausting, and there’s just no way for it to get any better. I had contemplated and planned my for my death for a very long time. However, committing to my decision to kill myself actually required a great deal of time and determination. It was actually pretty difficult to drown out that little voice in my …

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3

At this point, just looking for a peaceful exit.

  October 2nd, 2016 by princess_switters

I attempted suicide back in May, and while certainly not my first attempt (I’ve lost count) it was the most serious.  I OD’d on phenobarb and diazepam, was intubated and in coma for 10 days, and 5 months later my left leg is still paralyzed from the knee down from sciatic nerve damage sustained while unconscious.

I was naïve enough to think that returning to university this Fall would make me happy and give me a renewed sense of purpose, but class started last week and since then my desire to be dead has resurfaced and intensified to the point where it’s all I think about. I …

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6

It feels so weird to be back…

  September 17th, 2016 by Within Evanescence

Hi everyone,

I’m guessing that most of you don’t recognize me, but I made this profile about two years ago. Though, I haven’t posted anything in half a year. Just like you, I was at the bottom of the deepest bottle… At some point I started making actual plans for attempting suicide, and I once came very, very close to making an attempt, but I never actually tried anything for real. Here’s a simple explanation of why:

First of all, my school had sent me to a psychologist. That was one of the scariest experiences of my life, but it turned out to be one of the …

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5

Kathy’s Silent Cry for Help!

  September 15th, 2016 by blackberry2

Hello,                            9-14-2016

I am submitting a true story about my childhood and attempted suicide at 10 years old with hopes that my experiences may encourage open communication regarding this painful topic for parents, youngsters, and professionals. Please, we must try to prevent children and teens from feeling a need to end their lives. I hope that I may be able to help even one child, teen, or adult from feeling so alone having had such a traumatic childhood, and to help them realize that if they get help they will certainly smile again.?? …

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0

Reopening the project…

  September 12th, 2016 by 2sadhappy

It’s been about a year or so since I was here but something tells me it’s time to come back for a bit. I want to be here to be a lifeline for somebody. I used to receive emails from around the world and hear amazing stories. I had to step away for a while to catch my own breath but I like to hear from you guys.

I don’t consider myself suicidal at the moment although I have cut before and sometimes think about the silence of death as peaceful. I probably stand out a little in that I see death I’d say at least …

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3

Giving up

  August 27th, 2016 by Sach77

So… Im alive sadly. But I’m going to treatment on monday and I think I’m just gonna give up. I’m gonna lay in bed and not do anything. I’ll see what they do, I wonder. I wonder what will happen. No matter what they do I have nothing to live for. They can’t threaten anything if I have nothing to be threatened with. Idk I’m curious. well thats my rant thing today.

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3

I’m always being compared to my sister/ being left out

  August 24th, 2016 by GerbzBaby

In my family I’m the oldest of my two sisters (we are going to call them:) C and A. C being the first at 17 and A being the second youngest at 15. Me being of the age of 18 you’d think I wouldn’t be compared to my little sister (in this case my sister C)… But I am… A lot! I’m never just “Amanda” I’m just “C’s sister”.

“Oh! You are very shy compared to C.” “Your nothing like C is!” “You don’t look like C or A at all!” “You and C have nothing in comman.” These are just the few I can think …

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3

It will never get better

  August 20th, 2016 by Goneandforgotten

Two years ago I tried to kill myself. I had been in therapy for over a year before that and it did not help. After a hellish week in the hospital, a 10 day outpatient program and 3 months of twice weekly outpatient and continued therapy (still going) things were “better”.

But they weren’t. I have put on a facade for so long that I don’t even know who I am anymore. After my attempt I promised my kitty I would stay here for him. He died July 6th. I was in a newish relationship with someone who I really liked, and he could not handle my …

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2

Malaise

  August 20th, 2016 by anothernoone

First time posting here.

I’ve been, I guess you could say “actively suicidal” in the past.  Perhaps not currently.  But, on some level, I’m always thinking about it.

I feel tired.  old.  most of all, worthless.

I’m not who I set out to be.  I was reading someone else’s post on here about how it could take just one big thing to fuck up your life forever.  and yeah.  but, breaking it down, it’s probably not one thing or one event, but a whole series of things over a whole series of years.  or you hit so many setbacks, fallen off the proverbial horse so many times, you …

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2

Scared to Live, Not to Die

  August 19th, 2016 by FlaminJoy

Ever since I was a little girl, living was an issue. I’ve wanted to die since I was 8 yrs old. My mother was/is evil and doesn’t have feelings like most people do. Common traits of a Sociopath; she would have a lot of sex with a lot of people just so she could feel something… Or at least I tell myself that’s the reason why. She married my dad while she was still married and had 2 sons with someone else. My dad didn’t know, but her first husband soon found out and divorced her. My dad in turn raised my two older brothers …

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1

Why Do I Do This

  August 13th, 2016 by justonemorecut

Why? Why do I do this to myself? Why do I keep making myself suffer? Why don’t I have the courage to do it?

This is my life and I can do it if I want to, I’m tired of people saying don’t, I’m sick of them telling me to stop being so damn selfish and to think of others. Like I’m a person too damnit why cant they think of what I’m going through, Why cant they see the pain I see why do they have the strength I don’t have. Where the hell am I supposed to go a damn hospital doesn’t help I …

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3

There is nothing more for me, need the end to set me free. Trapped in myself, body my holding cell.

  August 10th, 2016 by fadetoblack

I met you in my junior year of high school. its been almost 7 years since then, and exactly one month now since I last saw you. From the moment we met I knew there was something special in you, it didn’t take me more than a week to confess my love to you. From the very start I knew you were the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, you were just different than everyone else. Even after you moved away for school, I was always there when you needed me. I was in a dark place when you moved …

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1

My Soul Flies (And Fly It Will)

  August 6th, 2016 by Counting The Days Until I'm gone

Trapped inside this ominous receptacle,

Eighteen years, eight months, six days, ten hours, fifty minutes and forty seven seconds beyond my best before date,

I stand hollow and cavernous-as the wind cascades itself amidsts my masts, creating sweet tunes and great form;

My eyes have been spectators to such mesmerising beauty, humbling devastation and horror;

My ears have beared witness to great orchestrated melodies, profound speeches and bone wrenching pleas for intervention;

My skin has felt the sweet caress of a caring hand, the firm- corrective thump of life, the allure of a sexual pulse and the sterility and inamimacy of iron.

My heart has endured the thrills of young love, …

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13

This is where my life ends, Tonight

  July 29th, 2016 by Sach77

I’ve been on this site for a awhile now, but I just created an account and I guess this is where I’ll send my goodbyes to the world…

The past three days I was supposed to commit suicide. It ended up not happening, it almost did last night but my boyfriend ended up just talking to me like usual and I felt guilty for going to leave and have our last conversation be so boring. the two days before that I had set every detail in place, I’ve cleaned my room to the T and printed out all my suicide letters. I finished a lot of …

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3

You are loved

  July 25th, 2016 by honoringtrent

This is my first post, though I’ve perused many over the past few months. I have found a lot of comfort here, but have also felt so much despair seeing so much pain put into words.

You see, I was shocked and blindsided by the loss of my husband, the father of my children, my life partner for 11 years, my best friend, to suicide on June 13, 2015.

I plan to post more at a later time, but felt incredibly compelled to post this now…. You are loved.

I don’t know you and you don’t know me, but I hope you read this (yes, I’m talking to …

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3

Life after Hell is possible

  July 18th, 2016 by pinkcoconut

Hi all.
Just remembered about this place in a melancholy moment.
I’m doing ok. Was very suicidal for a few hellish months a year and a half ago.
I’m not suicidal now. I think about self harm occasionally, but I manage it – I don’t act on it – I do something else, like arrange to see a friend. That used to sound stupid or unthinkably difficult, but I’ve done lots of training of myself to get to a place where I’ve got habits.
My life is not perfect and I did have a shitty start in some ways, but in others, my world is amazing and I’m incredibly …

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1

I think I’m going under…

  July 15th, 2016 by xashlerzx

I need help… I need to feel something again other than pain and sadness and heavy hearted. I’m falling apart and no one notices anymore because apparently I’ve been become too good at hiding. Ironic really that the only thing I’m good at anymore is hiding how I really feel. 22 years of doing it though, I better be fucking good at SOMETHING.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me… Why can’t I ever enter into a relationship where I’m not used, betrayed, or abused? Why can’t I feel happiness again, but REALLY feel it? I smile at my loved ones, I

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