Well, I guess, My story starts about 1 year ago… I had been struggling with Insomnia and would do anything to get a full nights rest. I was mean, angry and on the verge of tears constantly. My friend had the same issue, but not as bad, her mom had bought some all natural sleeping aids. They worked great for my  friend and I was envious! I had asked my mom as soon as I heard about the success, if she could maybe be open to me trying them out.. I was shut down so fast… I was angry and hurt that she had said […]

Well… I don’t know… I have three older brothers my first brother is 15 years older than me so I pretty much grew up without him, my second oldest brother is 12 years older hes nice sometimes but it seems like he’s always obsessing over me.. He calls me baby and says he loves me and gives me hugs and kisses most of the time forcefully and smacks my butt and I scream at him to stop and my youngest brother is 5 years older than me… He’s my closest brother.. It was so hard for me when he left for college.. I didn’t know […]

Can’t sleep. Can’t get out of bed. Can’t stop checking the windows. Can’t stop this feeling that someone’s watching me. Can’t stop thinking about it. And worst of all, I can’t do anything about it.

I just sometimes ending itall is so enticing because every single worry I have would go away I wouldn’t stress abouy my boyfriend friends, family, school and all of the dumb assignemtns I have, orchestra, band I wouldn’t have any more cares. And the relief that I would experience just is really appealing sometimes but that also wprries me, what of I actually do it it just sounds rrally nice right now. I can’t sleep and I want my emotions to go away they’re so stupis. To not feel amything wow and at rhis momwnt I look forward to absolutely nothing. I’m done

I’m in the exact same boat!  How can I help you?

I hate reading all these messages of optimism on these suicide sites. Especially when it’s in response to a teenager, “You have your whole life ahead of you!” Yeah right. If it’s anything like mine, you don’t want to live through it.

I’m 30, and I’ve wanted to die since I was 8. Too young? Not when you mother is psychologically abusive. I have a lifetime full of stories about her. The shortest example I can think of was when I was a teenager. I got my report card. It was 2 A’s, a B, and a C. She SCREAMED at me for over 2 hours. […]

I’m so ugly. So fat. I can’t help but feel naked without my make up on. I feel ashamed to go out in public. Like people will laugh at me and call me names. I feel bad for people who have to look at me all the time, I’m sorry. I’m 5’4 and 173 pounds, I’m huge. I need to stop eating my feelings. Why does everyone have to be so mean though? I’m so nice to everyone else and all I get in return is getting called emo, slut, whore, fatass, ****… like what the fuck man? And then my friends parents accuse me […]

I’m tired of such hypocrites and judgmental individuals. I have made mistakes in my life, I’ve done some screwed up shit. But guess what? SO HAVE YOU. There’s no reason to act as if you are a saint. It’s ridiculous.

I’m tired of drama. No one cares about your life. That’s one concept that nearly ALL of humanity cannot seem to grasp. The only reason they would care about or even acknowledge your life is if there were DRAMA. Doesn’t that kind of seem like a freak show? Like the audience (humans around you) are enjoying watching you struggle with some obstacle or watching you completely fuck your […]

i cant. everywhere i turn his name is mentioned or brought up. Everything reminds me of him. everyone knows him. i try to seperate myself but i cant. I LITERALLY CANNOT FORGET YOU. I loved him so much. I LOVE him so much. if i saw him idk what id do. id break down sobing. id run up to him and jump on him. id slap him and curse at him and let him know how much he hurt me. how much he is hurting me. i cant breathe when i think about him. i see pictures with him and his new girl on fb, […]

Last week I found this website and thought it might help to get all my feelings out because I kind of hold them back. Actually I hold them back a lot. For some reason I started to not sleep again and I know when I don’t get sleep things get bad. But they haven’t gotten this bad since my suicide attempt last year. I don’t know what I was doing but two days ago I just started taking some pills I had. My boyfriend could tell something was wrong and said he was coming over by the time he had gotten here I had taken […]

i havent been on here in months … im sorry if any of you left to soon .. lately i feel the same

i started talking to people who i guess you could say were a lot worse than me but i still understood how they felt .

6 months later i still feel tired and sad all the time and i dont know why

I like fighting, as a sport and life I guess.  I really want it all to end.  But I can’t bring myself to end it, I really want something out of my control to give me a fight I can’t win for my demise.  Apparently that’s tougher than it seems, I’ve been hit by 2 cars in 1 week and it left me with little more than some bruises.  I’ve survived 7 attempts (apparently I’m bad at it) and numerous accidents growing up and I wake up almost astonished that I’m still on the planet.  I seriously walk around miserable and I can’t do anything […]

Oklahoma This Is For You!

To help

If I won the lottery,

I would feel free;

I’d give it all to you,

Because it’d be up to me.

I don’t care how much the cost,

Don’t care how many there are;

Whether you’re nice, mean, in between,

I still hope it would go far.

Houses torn down everywhere,

People have no place to stay;

They could only sit and watch,

As their homes just blew away.

Kids were at the school,

Trying to take cover;

As it began to hit,

They were protecting one another.

Some didn’t make it,

Broken hearts all around;

Let’s take a moment of silence,

And please no make a sound.

Losing a loved one is painful,

Something everyone can feel;

Too bad […]

heavy duty shit in therapy yesterday. rejection, dismissal, self hatred etc etc. my psyche is fighting tooth and nail to keep some horrible thing secret. what that is i don’t know. saw the shrink last week. another appointment and a new script. losing faith in pharmaceuticals. there doesn’t seem to be anything out there for me. left the office angry and upset. felt rejected, dismissed, discarded. why exactly i don’t know. the doc didn’t do or say anything particularly egregious. it was like there was something i desperately wanted to communicate but i couldn’t find the words. then my 20 minutes was up. go away. […]

So i decided to share my suicide story with you.  I am 26 year old male from Europe. I had on-off strong suicide thoughts since my early teenage years. I hate myself a lot. i don’t think i should live on.
The reason for that is that i always end up in some really bad, shitty situations. Mostly due myself and my own stupidity,  laziness or my weak character. I mostly live from one emotional disaster to an other, some shit always happens to me, and i freak out and can’t take it easy. And i effect people around me, a lot of people got […]

This is a poem I made

Why do people expect the most
Why do people think you are made of steel
Why do people hurt me
Why do they have to push me down
Why do they hit me when im already down
why are people so crule
why are people make my life worse than it already is

I am suicidal and I have attempted suicide on many occasions. I have been to a treatment center for it but I don’t feel it helped at all. I still cut and I love it.

They say it’s going to get better. It isn’t. People who say it’s better to be alone than have bad company, have never truly been alone. They Don’t know how much it hurts. It hurts so much, I just want to rip my skin off so I can stop feeling it. One day, when I stop being a coward, I will be able to do it, and I will finally have peace and all the pain will go away. Life is too ugly for me to bear. People are too mean and I’m too stupid to not believe their lies.

It takes years to build,

Seconds to break

And forever to repair