I cant live a sad existence anymore, i feel separated from everything constantly. Wish i was still with my ex and I know i would be happy. Without her i dont have the will to carry on and live. I want to just be able to disappear and i know that noone would actually miss me.
i want to know what i have done that had been so bad for me to live like this, i just cant go on
Tag:
Existence
to die. So I’m pretty sure I’m done I am very serious but can’t become 100% certain. I can’t function around people, I have been deeply depressed for around 7 years, My motivation in life is to hurt those who hurt me nothing more and nothing less. I have no real goals or dreams in life, I have been on alot of medication, tried everything, have no reason to live and am almost sure I am incapable of love or happiness or even being content. I don’t want to live in any society and I wont do anything I don’t want to. I don’t want […]
Professional psychological counseling is still two weeks away, been treading water while friends hit me with oars. To help me, I guess. That’s what it feels like sometimes. The lies they tell me to “comfort” me have been exposed once more by their behavior and thoughtlessness and it sickens me and drags me deeper, even though it was meant to help. That life vest seems pretty appealing, then you put it on, and then they tell you “by the way, it’s made of concrete”. Down you go.
For longer than I can remember, I say I am a unhappy, existence is meaningless, people are deluded, the […]
I dont know why i am writing to this place, but im going to end this existence in 2 days. I going to to this by hanging because it seems quite peaceful way to go besides of jumping and cutting. Â I have read i think to many news and personal stories and i really do know what i am doing. I have a job and a loving family but i am an idealist, like my psychiatrist said and i just cant live like this anymore. My body i just a burden to me, i have tried everything to fix my life, make it near ideal […]
it will always be the person you least expect,nomatter how many times you dye your hair, or change your appearence,your still you and your nothing special, not like everyone els,life is overrated,so whats so special about making the best outa having nothing, having noone,being used consinly, every time you stick your face out the front door, you fail to make it any futher,everytime you stick your face out the front door, someone says there your freind, but they aint,they either use you, or call you once and find you worthless enough to never answer or call you again,the only person that has ever made me […]
no more depression starting today. At least, no more acknowledging it. I know why it’s there now, I know it. I’ve got the spotlight on my darkness. I’m no more better off but at least I’ve come to terms with this putrid existence. I’ve drowned in misanthropy, hatred for my fellow man. I’ve closed myself off to the world for the most part, spend every day miserable and unsatisfied.
I know now, nothing will please me, and that’s just fine. I feel that much more at peace with death and will fear it that much less when it comes, whenever it comes.
I’ve been doing the […]
I’m pretty much as broken and useless as it’s possible to be. I can’t do anything right – not exaggerating, it’s the truth. I’m barely human and don’t really do the things that normal humans do or feel the way normal humans feel. When I’m hurt or frustrated I get angry – but real people don’t feel anger, don’t express those things. Real people are happy most of the time, not unhappy or angry most of the time. I’m just wrong. Broken. Unfit for human consumption. God I wish my mother had aborted me. What is the point of me? There is none. The worst […]
I am a shell. I have been dealing with depression for about 4 years now, and it has eaten away at me till there is nothing left but the corporeal person you may meet, or not. I consider myself dead most of the time. I finally started to come to that realization after my girlfriend left me. We can call her Elizabeth. She was the one who initially saw that I needed help, real help. She convinced me to go out and seek medical treatment in any form. She wanted to stay with me and grow old together, but that required me to live to […]
I’m so tired of it all. My mother is putting me under an enormous amount of pressure to get all of this school work done by the end of may, but I know I cannot do it. Even if I stopped talking to internet friends and reading, I would still not get it done in time. With one of my classes, which conveniently, is the hardest one for me, I can do it through the summer. But my mother came into my room last night screaming her head off about me finishing it and that I would not do it over the summer. She is […]
I lack the ability to be persistent,so it’s the end of the line.
by jackraiden
written by jackraiden
Up till now, i have always tried to change my life.
I have tried to be consistent, in everything but failed..in everything.
Everything i try from losing weight to even brushing my teeth ends up not being done, and im sick of it, im sick of it all, life is a god damn chore that i don’t want to join, its sucks,i have no one else that understands me, no one, all i have are idiots around me, my family and friends will never understand me and how painful it is thinking this way, getting up to wash your face feels like climbing a mountain.
I will never […]
Sorry for my bad English, I’m Dutch/French (I’m a 18 years old, school dropout). I hope this all makes somewhat sense…
I was seen as a child prodigy when I was child (learned myself read at a young age and I went directly to second year of primary school), but everything went bad in secundary school. I feel totally useless. I have nothing to live for. The expectations that society has, the expectations I have of myself. The reality that doesn’t fit the expectations. My apathy towards humans, towards my family. I have no friends, I never needed friends, neither have I desired to have friends. I […]
There are only two things in life. Success and failure. Call them as you will, happiness and discontentment, power and disinfluence, or fame or obscurity. There is only one thing after life. Death. To those who want it, it comes too late. To those who don’t, it comes too soon. Life is the long winding road to death. After our deaths comes the death of all who we know, and then the death of all who they have ever met and so on. The chance that everyone you have ever influenced will be dead increases over time. But you already know that. We delude ourselves […]
I’ve come to the conclusion that im a complete waste of space, and i want to eliminate this pointless shitstain of an existence i call a life from the face of the earth.
My whole life i was labeled ugly and worthless, and any word that can add the prefix “un” would describe me. Im unathletic, untalented, unattractive, unimportant, unmotivated, uninteresting, unappealing, basically anything you can think of.
I grew up with my father always angry, and telling me i was a worthless human being. He would say it was his way of building me up to be a man, but all it did was make me […]
i have been betrayed by my so called friends am mad at the world and lost all hope for trust and this is developed into despair and depression. Everyday is painful I am reminded of how much this hurts every time I wake up in the morning and I ask myself how come am not dead yet. when i contemplate suicide something happens and i end up postponing it. For example, I might get a random call or visit from a friend and I have to “act” like am ok but this kinda makes me post pone it till later when I am trying to […]
To all who’ve loved me.
i leave this is in wake of my soul, as it has left my body.
I give you my utmost apologies, that i know will never suffice for the loss or troubles i’ve given you, in my life and in my suicide. I would not leave a note if it weren’t for the urge i feel even now to assure you that it was by nothing you’ve done, that i’m leaving my life this way. To my family and friends find solace in the fact that were it not for you, i would not have even made it this long. You loved […]
Some people on here post that they are ashamed to be complaining because they have a relatively comfortable life outside the specific troubles they are dealing with. There is no reason to be ashamed because you happened to be born in a developed country to people who can give you a decent lifestyle as far as food, clothing, and shelter. That is the fortune of your birth and you had nothing to do with it.
Sure you can help people who you consider less fortunate.  Still it does not help your mental state for you to add guilt or sadness to your already existing pain. Nothing […]
Em, to be quite frank I could give a toss about existing as a science form of a “human being”, who, at this point, feels as though I cannot connect to society on any sort of level that is going to be productive for myself, my future, interactions with others or work any harder than I have for financial security for when I am at an age whereas I cannot look after myself anymore. Personally, I find the world around us has screwed anyone that gives a sh*t about a decent life, it is obviously a mental f*ck of whereas I have no energy to […]
Hey kids, here’s some advice: if you feel like killing
yourself, do it. Do it as soon as you can, because life and society will take
everything from you as you get older. It will even take your desire to kill
yourself. That may sound like a good thing, but it isn’t. You will lose the
will to kill yourself, but not the root emotions that made you consider suicide
in the first place. You will still feel like shit, but will lack the passion
and ambition to actually solve it with suicide.
You may see signs of physical weakness in the adults around
you, but […]
turning 27 next month and what do i have to show for it? nothing. that’s pretty much it. yes, i seem to have a lot to be thankful for. pretty regular childhood, supportive family, awesome guy. what’s missing? well, me. a stupid job. no money. more than that, now i think no skills. looks like i’ve wastd 3 yrs working at something i havent understood at all. coz even tho the current employer seems pretty happy with my performance, i’ve failed three job tests for what i hav been doing for so long. i have ultra nice friends too. all of whom get at least […]
I was taught to believe you exist and you are the creator of all things.
Through my own thought and reasoning I do believe you exist and I do believe you created all things as everything is too intricate and complicated to have happened by chance.
But as you are the creator, the point of origin of all existence, I feel you have some explaining to do.
As God and creator even if you created the big bang and evolution, you are singularly responsible for all things. This means you are evil. This means you are good. As these did not exist otherwise. Yes evil is your creation. […]