I have somethings to say before I go.
my life is not a sad story, no big loss(except my drug addict father, no big harm), no love story, no being poor, no child working, no lack of attention, no lack of caring people around me, no lack of friends, etc…
and I don’t exactly know why I’m heading this road since I remember.
I’ve lost my believe in Allah (muslims’ god) and then any form of god by the beginning of highschool, my father left me and my mom a year after, spending his Shit money on the drugs; we were waste of money and […]
Tag:
life
Pain is thay friend you keep close as you cut. It’s what’s needed to survive the depression. Pain grows and is fed through self hate. Self hate can be acquired through any means, although some self hate is stroger than others’ self hate. The difference between me and you is that when you wake up, your nightmare ends. I used to live in fear of death. But i turned that fear into self hate to feed the mature pain that has been accumulated inside of me since i was born. That pain gave birth to a hate of life and everything that falls within that […]
After middle school, Isaiah decides to do somethinf about the bullying. He works out everyday, starts getting his hair cut, and begins to change his overall appearance. At the age of 14, he begins to feel better about life. Why? Because not only is he looking and feeling different, but people are treating him differently. People begin to become nicer to him. For once he begins to feel love and attention that he never recieved as a child. He doesn’t know how to handle it so he eats the attention up and becomes a bully himself. He unconsciously wants to spread pain to other people. […]
Because Isaiah had no biological mother or father in his life, his grandparents and aunt claimed legal guardianship. Isaiah fears his legal guardians. Why? Because they gave him a lot of ass whoopings he did not deserve. During his elementary school years, Isaiah is bullied, teased, and harrassed constantly by his classmates and students of higher grades. Isaiah taught himself another skill besides lying. He taught himself how to withdraw himself. You see Isaiah knew that people didn’t want to be bothered with him, so he withdrew himself to reduce the chance of adding to the pain he was already enduring. One of the ways […]
I feel so alone b/c I am. tired of being the only one not living life in my household
I’m not a human being to anyone. All my friends are fake and liars, full of shit, false hopes and false promises.
The guy I had fallen for bitches endlessly about how alone he is, how bad he wants someone, and how he needs to be loved bit ignores me like I don’t exist. No response means that I don’t matter and I don’t count for shit. As I never have in life.
Even people here are wrong and full of it. My only replies are on what women want and how to get a woman when I have said I am not interested in women! I […]
it isnt loneliness that i feel anymore, its more than that. its the feeling you get when you realise your life was a lie, when you realise that everyone around you lied. its the feeling of being let down and rejected. where do i go from here? please help me..
Let me start off by saying that I am only 16 years old and currently in the 11th grade. I have been going through severe depression for about a few years now and everyday is a struggle for me. When I open my eyes the next morning knowing that I have to get up and start another day of this pointless life that I live. I have been going to the same school for eight years and as the years passed by and we all got older I still ended up having no friends and only having acquaintances and being used all the time for […]
I don’t know if I should be here. I feel as if I’m wasting their time; doctors, support systems, YMCA. I know they all say that it’s the reason they’re there, that you’re not wasting their time. But honestly, I’m just not mean enough to tell them that they are in fact, wasting their time.
It’s not their fault, it’s just the state of mind I have gotten myself into. I guess only I can get myself out of it.
Don’t get me wrong, I do see a point to life. But it contradicts it’s self. I thought the meaning of life was to give it a meaning, but then […]
The title explains who I am. The list of things wrong with me doesn’t stop at the age of 18. -Do nothing every single day my entire life but play video games. -Eat nothing but fast food. -have 0 friends. […]
God is boring . boring God . why human’s imagination & fantasy is better than God boring reality ? why God is boring ?
by niki
written by niki
God is boring . boring God .
why human’s imagination & fantasy is better than God boring reality ?
why God is boring ?
I hate this world . I hate this life . I hate life .
This world is so boring , boring world !
This life is so boring , boring life ! life is boring .
Why movies , games , anime / manga, & fantasy / imagination is better than this world / better than life / real life / real world / reality ?
everyday life is the same : wake up, eat, go to school/work, boring, then go back home, […]
How long have you been depressed and when did you first start getting treated for it?
by gwerg
written by gwerg
I’ve been extremely depressed for 4 years now (basically my entire teenage life) and have yet to seek any medical attention, like an idiot. So out of curiosity, how long have you been depressed, when did you start getting therapy and how has it been so far? Will be looking forward to every response. I am extremely depressed and closed to the edge but I doubt anything will truly help me.
My life is shit for many reasons and i am destined to suffer until the last second that i will live in this hell. And the worst thing is that i honestly believe that i don’t deserve this kind of life. I was always a good person, respected & help others and NEVER done anything bad to anyone. So why i am living this hell? I want to enjoy what others are enjoying… but instead i will never have a girlfriend because i am so fucking short, ugly and child looking, i will never have a family and i will become a fucking miserable 80 […]
I want so many things in life. I want to be the one that makes a difference. I want to be the person that will be there for you no matter what. I want to be someone useful. I want to be liked and accepted. I mean, who doesn’t? I want to fit in. I want to be happy.
I want a normal life with a normal family. I wish I had someone I could call mom. Have someone to call dad. I never had a dad growing up so it makes me want one even more. I see girls with their dads and those are […]
I should be naturally happy and enjoying life instead I’m wishing I was dead all the time.
I got close again to my ex and it’s clear as daylight can be when you go from the dark to the outside…she is my doom. I know what I can do to be okay. I simply do not like this life and find it boring… So I should shit on other people to be happy myself… So I need to lower my standards….
Side note… I know depression And cancer are caused by foods that we eat (stress also helps) and I wonder these rich companies… We’re they aware ? Or should we believe in their stories when the time comes that they get unmasked? […]
I wish I could believe in God. I wish I could convince myself that there was some omniscient, all loving being with the power to guide me and influence my circumstances for the better. I wish I could believe that there was a perennial force looking out for me and giving ubiquitous company. I wish I could believe that everything concludes with justice, that those who commit significant transgressions receive a punishment proportional to their crime. I wish I could believe that there is meaning in suffering, that the pain endured produced a reward to make it worth it.
I wish I could believe that life […]
…its hard… It’s harder…and occasionally it’s on super extraordinary hard mode…
I’m an old member who thought I was done with this place…. Right… Not even close. I won’t say I wish I was dead. But I wish I could free myself ….
After retrospectively examining every second prior to this I now understand that it all boils down to choices….
There isn’t anything stopping us from making better choices.
Seriously just think of a few choices in your everyday life that could drastically change your life. Something as simple as a bus ticket can change your life. If you are underage a new book, look, game or friend […]
Title says what i want to say….so i’ll just add this. Live a life of independance not dependance….thanks to all who helped and (she knows who she is) love you 🙂
I get a lot out of this website. I remember during my darkest years I never wanted to talk about suicide with anyone even though it was the only thing on my mind. I never wanted to talk to them because I felt like their first reaction would be to talk me out of it. I’m not at all angry at them for reacting this way. I know they loved me and they didn’t want to lose me but I never wanted to talk about suicide because….I don’t know. Maybe because they would never see it as an option. Because they would have their own agenda. […]