Hello,
I am gonna leave SP pretty soon. Somehow this site triggers my sadness.
If anyone wants to talk via email, id love to.
sui_rc@yahoo.com.
Be happy, to anyone and everyone who reads this. You will have realised by now that life moves pretty fast, and its to short to be sad over something. I use sad a s a generic word for anxiety, depression etc.
This site has provided me a lot of support when no one near and dear to me understood why i cut.
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
Such a short fix. But a long list of consequences.
Why do we overeat knowing full well the price we’ll pay later? Especially since it happens again and again and again and again? Do we never learn?
I didn’t eat “bad” food per se (the place I wanted to go to was closed, and I didn’t eat bad junky food yesterday either, but overdid it on the quantity). I know I should eat lunch, stop, then not eat till dinner. So simple, and yet why so hard to follow? Why we humans such fools?
I had a large lunch, (a super giant entree-sized bowl of chicken spinach soup, […]
I feel like I’m different .
I don’t have an opinion on anything . Nor do I have a passion. I’m not good at anything . Not having a opinion for anything is boring .I’m so fucking bored.
And I’m tired . I had a short class today before the holidays and i got home at 10 and slept until now (7pm) I’m debating whether or not to sleep again. I can feel my eyes drooping.
I just hate that I feel like I don’t feel for anything and I feel nothing . & these thoughts make me feel like a looser .
I can’t even explain […]
What is it in people that keep them around? I see so much suffering, grief. Awful things- and I think- why do they keep on going? Why don’t they just end the misery?
Why haven’t I ended the misery. I’ve tried to be optimistic. These feelings will pass, the vice will loosen it’s grip upon my neck. And it does, for short while. But, for the past 2 years, the pain has been ever present. The desire to disappear grows with each hour. I look for a cure, for a reason to stay, but cannot find one.
I’m a below average statured man, yet i htink my looks may be not that bad. at a certain point in my life i began that noticing sometimes in public setting women would notice me.
Like this morning i went for lunch with my parents at a fine restaurent when then this gorgeous girl walked in with (i think) her Grandparents and they sat in a table next to us and it happened she noticed me.
Maby its the reason i’m feeling so bad today knowing that i’m a socially awkward fuck, that i dont have the guts and even if i had no woman whats to […]
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
I’m sorry everybody, I’m sorry I keep posting my short stories. I know you don’t want to read them, and I don’t want to distract from this site’s purpose. I’m so surprised that even though I’ve posted quite few stories by now I’ve had no active complaints. I won’t keep posting these stories. I tried to rationalize it, I tried to tell myself it was okay because people would say they’re beautiful or that they enjoyed them, but I shouldn’t be doing this I came back because I’m in a living hell. A hell where I can’t feel anything anymore. Instead I post these stupid […]
It’s been some time since my first post. I think I can stop myself from killing myself on my pre-set suicide date (Nov 30). I think I just need a bit more hope. I hope I don’t fall back into despair because I want to live. Sorry that this post is short.
I know I’m usually a rambler so I’ll keep this brief. After ages of debating, of hoping, of begging, I’ve decided to give up. I don’t feel like there’s anything good about me, I feel as if I’ll never be loved or supported and I’ll never achieve anything that I want. I’ve spent the past 19 years trying to feel happy. Thanks for being kind to me in my brief time here. I intend to shoot myself tomorrow morning, when everyone in my family is gone. I’ll make sure no one, but a cop or medical personnel finds me, so won’t worry about that.
…you are in love with a girl and you know that you will never be able to do anything with her because you are the ugly, short idiot that nobody cares about? I am so depressed and desperate all the time because of that and because i know that i will be alone forever. I feel terrible so much that i lock myself in my room and i hate everyone. I don’t want to speak to anyone… i was starting to get used to the fact that i am unattractive and that i will never find the special one but now… now i feel so […]
The tears just wont stop coming
Every day now – I cry
I ask God to take me – to give me some relief from this hell I live in
For a very short time, I thought there was hope
But just like everyone else, he left me alone
I was stupid to even believe in a glimmer of happiness
It never comes
I don’t want to be here anymore
2 nights ago I dreamed I was torn apart by a mountain lion – and that peace, that you only find in death – I felt that in the dream.
And then I woke up […]
I’m a 23 year old guy. Finished My Uni degree last year. The last year of uni was rough to say the least. Went through a lot of cutting and now my left arm is a ruined mess, scars so big and ugly that there is no hope in hell of ever wearing short sleeves again.
I felt so defeated by the time I completed my degree that I didn’t go to my graduation ceremony and I only picked up my certificate 5 months later. I haven’t gotten any jobs since then, been unemployed for a whole year. My family ridicules and demeans me at every […]
I just got to writing a good steam of conciousness for a change, about how no one listens to me. Long story short, everyone else is always telling their stories about their life and no one is willing to listen to mine. Even the people closest to me who see me the most don’t listen, so how can I ever matter in this world? I don’t, and I can’t. Anyway, I guess this will be the book to look for when I’m gone. I bought it at least a few months ago but haven’t kept up with writing in it. It was my intention to […]
Things are not good for me. More or less I am nothing more then a dissapointment in everything I do. I am a failure as a boyfriend,father,friend,son,grandson…you name it. I am falling apart in every way imaginable. I hate to look at myself,and no matter what I do I can’t seem to pull out of this. I tried to end it once,but was “saved” by 2 friends….not this time. I have a short period of time before my 2 year suicide clause is up on my life insurance,I have a storage unit large enough to fit my truck in it rented so no one can […]
This is probably my last online interaction.
It makes me appreciate every little thing that happens. Such a short stay here. This is beginning to sound like a suicide note so without wasting more time, I’m logging out to wallow in memories and experience this remaining span of life.
We met, we fell in love. Loved for a short time, broke up. I cried, he didn’t care. He loved again, I died…
counts in life but the way you feel and your sense of self. To think any less is to be lying to yourself. Never sell yourself short.
Life is caving in around me… the life I have has changed. The girl I love and the children I’ve raised don’t give me the time of day, the love has just vanished. I’ve done everything right but I have nothing more to give. I can’t take what this feeling is anymore… I’ve lost her once and now it’s happening again and I can’t go through it twice…Everyone tells me life is to short to dwell on this but I know i can’t do this without her… tomorrow doesn’t seem to look any brighter.
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