Tag:

working

That moment when you realize you dont have the time you think you do.

by deadmanliving(hopefullyhopeful) 4/10/2016

written by deadmanliving(hopefullyhopeful)

Edit:
I like this video it makes me feel less sub conscious about my looks. The girl makes me a bunch of good points now onto the post

I said in a previous post that i would kill myself in 18 (now 17 1/2 months) then i realized its more like 11 1/2. You see if im in the home strech at the same point I’m at I’m going to do it. Don’t get me wrong im moving forward still working out i have an interview tomorrow in the new city im moving to (about an hour and a half away this makes the 3rd major […]

4/10/2016 18 comments

New Drawing – Unfinished

by JiminyCrispies 4/8/2016

written by JiminyCrispies

I know I’ve already posted tonight, but I couldn’t get rid of my energy. I ended up working on this drawing of Oliver Sykes and Josh Franceschi.

It’s not finished – I still need to work into their faces and tweak some of their facial features- but I’m about to move on to doing something completely unrelated, and I thought I’d post what I’ve done so far while I’m still somewhat focused on it. It’s good enough considering the state I’m in right […]

4/8/2016 9 comments

Mental Health Stigma

by TheHandle 4/8/2016

written by TheHandle

I suffer from Major Depressive Disorder, Existential Depression, with Suicidal Ideation. I’m from Detroit, MI. My primary full-time job has been working as an EMT for the past 10 years but I am also a DJ/producer. I’ve worked with, and been around some well known artists and I am moderately well known in the DJ community here in […]

4/8/2016 9 comments

The Whole Endorphins Thing is BS

by claritee 4/6/2016

written by claritee

Just had a nice sweaty workout and I feel nothing but dead inside. I just had to come home and cry right after working out. I like working out, it feels like I have blood running through my veins during that, but afterward there are no endorphins. Nothing makes me feel good. I still want to die, if not more. Fuck.

4/6/2016 3 comments

Frustrated.

by evildandelions 4/3/2016

written by evildandelions

These are all the (non-medication) “treatments” I’ve been told will help me feel less depressed in the last decade:

Exercise. Okay, yes, exercise is good for everyone. But I became depressed when I was running 15 miles a week and I’ve never seen any difference in my depression from periods of time where I was exercising regularly or wasn’t. I believe it can help with anxiety, at least to an extent, but I personally haven’t felt any effect yet. This is something I’ll continue to do regardless (I would like to run a 5k again), and maybe over a longer period of time I’ll notice a […]

4/3/2016 4 comments

So Much To Talk About… So Little Time

by PlzLetGo 4/1/2016

written by PlzLetGo

Since I was about three years old I was told my life would be become better for the events that played out later.

My parents split when I was three (no I am not heartbroken about it, I have not talked it him in almost 15 years). I was told that my life would take a step in a better direction now that a toxin was gone.

I was sexually and physically assaulted when I was five. No one in my life found out until I was 12/13 because hell at the time I didn’t even know what that was. It was my mom’s boyfriend at the […]

4/1/2016 1 comment

Haven’t been happy for the longest time..

by headupunderdarkcloud 3/28/2016

written by headupunderdarkcloud

It was roughly about this time last year that that darkness swooped in and took over.
It’s happened before, but in time would usually pass, this time, it’s remained.
Every day is a struggle, I’ve tried so many things to shake it..
Girls, drinking, exercise, working, everything just a temporary distraction, just clicking off the seconds, trying to make it through another day.
Finding this site has helped, a place to vent, to read other peoples experiences and feel a certain kinship, to know am not alone, dealing with a life that once promised so much potential, now, just a daily chore to remain,hoping for […]

3/28/2016 2 comments

I DON’T CARE IF THIS IS IN CAPS!

by GTSuicide_6 3/27/2016

written by GTSuicide_6

I was supposed to do my essay.

For weeks now.

Its not done.

Its not getting done.

I’m crying.

Why am I crying? I’m supposed to be working.

No no, I’m crying.

I’m crying I’m so sad.

I’m so sad. I am so alone. I am so sad I am so sad.

I am so sad. I hate myself.

I’m going to kill myself in a week or so.

I hate myself. I want to die.

I’m going to kill myself.

I hate myself.

I am a dumb fucking piece of shit ready to die.

I’m already rotten.

Nobody cares.

3/27/2016 3 comments

Long Time, No See

by NiDDA 3/24/2016

written by NiDDA

I haven’t been here in a while… Which sounds good. It means I am trying to move on and maybe I will succeed.

Since than I have started to work out. Here is my fatball face with my workout buddy:

And I got my dream catcher tattoo which I was really excited about.

I am still planning my working in London, I […]

3/24/2016 5 comments

What do you have to be afraid of?

by Gry 3/23/2016

written by Gry

I made some changes in my life. I wasn’t happy at my job, so I quit. I’ll need another job eventually, (I’m considering going back to school this fall, even) but for now I’m a house husband, blogger, working on some cosplay (because I wanted to grow up to be an Imagineer), preparing my first novel for self-pub via Amazon, and working on a second novel.

Life isn’t […]

3/23/2016 3 comments

Sorry for another post but Im a complet mess

by kupo95 3/23/2016

written by kupo95

Updat how fucked up is florida I went down the street to buy cigerrets and some random peson comes up to wanting to be “freinds and talk” when i kindly told him no im good .he tells my i was driveing i and i saw you walking and stop to say hi do you need a lift I can droo you off i said no now leave while waiting to a red light to cross the street he pulled up and opened his window and told him to fo fuck him slef and leave me alone .

Today I cried […]

3/23/2016 1 comment

Doing fine

by Moneypenny 3/23/2016

written by Moneypenny

So…

I am thinking, and searching on Google about it. And it feels good doing so because then everything becomes bearable: being scared of my future, being alone, being tired. I am thinking of staying on bed all day. I am sucking bigtime on my work and on my classes. I am trying and trying. But at the end nothing is working against my depression.

I am on therapy and on classes on how to deal with things. I am here. I called people and tried exercising. Tried being positive and living in present time. That’s what I am working on right now. But if I could […]

3/23/2016 9 comments

Untitled

by Drowning 3/22/2016

written by Drowning

so over the last new months iv been working on a song about how I feel being depressed suicidal still needs work but il share the first couple lines with u guys

– I keep trying to fill that fucking void inside it feels like life is just passing me by looking in the mirror iv totally lost who I am the cuts relieve the pressure can you save me from myself

alone and depressed anxiety stressed I’m hanging on for dear life but I dont see the reason why iv been thinking dose God really exist cause this is bull shit this is hell in living […]

3/22/2016 2 comments

Complete dread

by disgusting 3/22/2016

written by disgusting

I never thought I’d feel sick to my stomach with anger and dread, not wanting to go in to work. This has been the first full year that I’ve worked through a job, so I’ve never experienced anything like this before. And it’s the same thing I’ve heard my mom complain about why she absolutely loathes working. It’s because there’s always got to be some insufferable ***** there who makes everyone miserable!

So here’s what happened. The boss has been gone over a month now because she’s moving to another state. She’s supposed to be back at some point to tie up loose ends before she’s […]

3/22/2016 7 comments

The Sloth Falls Again

by Zetsumei 3/22/2016

written by Zetsumei

My apathy is starting to overpower me again. The meds don’t seem to be working anymore and counseling only turns the apathy to anger. An endless abyss or a destructive wrath: what is the lesser of two evils? Sure, I want to destroy humanity but I’m not an anarchist. I’m just a realist.

Even if humanity doesn’t wipe itself out with war, environmental destruction and overpopulation, cosmic forces will do it for them. Assuming humanity could transcend age one day and become cyborgs/androids, would there still be depressed people? Wishful thinking, that is.

I’m tired but I can’t die despite my wishes… I’m not meant to be […]

3/22/2016 2 comments

request a song

by darkwillow 3/22/2016

written by darkwillow

I play piano and it really helps take my mind off of things. I’m always running out of things to play, or stuck at current pieces I’m working on. So I thought, to help practice and to distract my mind, maybe i should start uploading piano request videos.

So, name a song, any song you would like to hear. Hopefully i can put something together within 24 hours.

(I also do guitar)

3/22/2016 41 comments

One of them days

by Drowning 3/18/2016

written by Drowning

Just having one of them days what’s the point ? What’s the purpose for being here what is the meaning of life the only thing promised is death right

I watch this film called wrist cutters the other night it’s about a guy who commits suicide but going to a place the same as earth but he’s just in a worster off depressed working a dead beat job searching for he lover etc

I believe that we have lessions to learn in this life and they keep repeating them self till we learn them but how can we learn something if we don’t know what it is […]

3/18/2016 7 comments

My heart keeps acting up and i wish it would stop.

by deadmanliving(hopefullyhopeful) 3/18/2016

written by deadmanliving(hopefullyhopeful)

I hate this fat unlovable unattractive unnecessary pimple filled lonely face. I hate being constantly reminded of my romantic/sexual irrelevance to women. Im tired of working out and eating better just to pig out and ruin it. Im tired of being ugly. The moments that give me peace are the moments where my chest/heart go funny. I know its just the caffeine and bronkaid effecting me. I wish I could just die. I’m tired of being poor irrelevant lonely fat and depressed. Im tired of it it makes me sick. Sick of living sick of everything. No one will ever want me. I try to […]

3/18/2016 9 comments

So beyond exhausted…

by disgusting 3/16/2016

written by disgusting

I feel like I’m several trillion spoons in debt… (if you get that reference)

So, the girl he was after rejected him. No, of course I don’t want him to be miserable but it would have been a bad situation for him to get involved with. He chases perfect little girls around or under 5′ tall and under 100 lbs. This one just so happened to be married (but in process of going to get divorced) with 2 little babies 9 months apart. It would have ruined everyone’s lives because of the things he has attached to his name. Which, could be the reason she had […]

3/16/2016 12 comments

I’m new.

by xx 3/16/2016

written by xx

Hi everyone,

I used to visit this site frequently years ago, but I was content to just read everyone’s struggles and think of them and relate… but since then just reading has become insufficient.

But I don’t want to tell my life story or make a long post, because I talk too much lately and I also just took my sleeping pill, so I would like to end this post coherently hahaha.

I’ll just say that I’ve been depressed since I was a child, and I noticed how different I was from everyone else, and after being abused and molested by 3 separate “friends,” at three separate points in my […]

3/16/2016 54 comments

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