Okay, well this is my story..
I’m quite young and I’m broken. I’m depressed and suicidal, clearly.. and i selfharm. I put on the fakest smile every single day. I’m miserable, I just want to be dead, to be free, to be happy. I have tried to take my own life many times, I don’t really have a massive story. But my depression has taken over me, my self eestem is horrible, I can’t leave the house without crying, I’m horribly fat and aswell so ugly. I hate leaving the house because I usually don’t have the nicest clothes because i’m not rich, my family struggles with money. I have never told anyone that, I feel like an embarrasment. My parents don’t live in the same house, they seperated a few months ago, I took it quite hard. I’ve seen them in physical fights, I don’t want kids nor a marriage, so whats the point in life? School is so hard, my grades are lowering and I feel like a disappointment, I get embarrased if i get in trouble or I get a low mark in a test. My life revolves around what people think of me, I hate it. I wish I had confidence, but i don’t. I do have friends but none of them really care about me, it would be so much better if I was dead. I’ve been cutting for about a year now, it helps but now I don’t feel like its enough anymore. I always get scared when people see my cuts, its the worst feeling. I’m weak, pathetic and useless. I’ve been seeing a counsellor, but I hate going I don’t like talking to her anymore, it’s hard for me to open up, I do tell her how I feel but she just asks me why I feel that way and I honestly can’t explain how I feel. But anyways, I don’t have much of a story but I’m fucked up and stupid.
2 comments
Well kid, I’m not too fat, but I’ve never weighted so much in my life as this year because I’ve been using lithium, so it’s hard to loose weight. I
Sorry, I did a mistake here. Post again.
Well kid, I’m not too fat, but I’ve never weighted so much in my life as this year because I’ve been using lithium, so it’s hard to loose weight. I’m not that ugly too, just my noise annoys me. But you know I have problems to get date. I always had. Comparing to my friends I was so lucky with girls like them. And you know, what’s the problem: it’s compaire yourself with others. I still do it today and that makes me sad, I think that may also happen to you. I had a friend wich was really fat while we were teens, and now, after he started practicing sports and the gym he is stronger and thinner than me. The problem is not how you like, the problem is INSIDE you. Why do you see pretty people suicide? Try to get help from psycologyst, she/he won’t ask you why you feel like that but can help. In many cases that help, maybe it can be usefull in yours.