Category:

Family & Friends Effects

The effects of suicide on family and friends.

A prayer to the floor

by Once 12/25/2021

written by Once

I’ve been on a journey of recovery, so to speak, for a while now. Part of the experience is journaling. Todays entry, as it is scribbled in my small notebook.

Dec 24 2021

Well. Christmas Eve tonight. I went to Eva’s and Brad’s house. I met Lee, Mark and Amber, Em, Jon, Steve, and Pepper, the family dog. We ate brisket, and various side dishes while christmas music played on a stereo. The atmosphere was friendly and happy. I learned that Amber had a run in with a lady at a laundromat. She tried to utilize new found principles of decency to remain calm. I learned that […]

12/25/2021 3 comments

read this if you’re struggling.

by zy 12/6/2021

written by zy

I was procrastinating on my homework when I came across this website. I’m writing this all off the top of my head so just stand by. So I read so many peoples stories on here and noticed one thing, everyone on here is going through the SAME THING. I myself often have bad mental health and breakdowns, but you know what? nobody is perfect. AND DON’T SKIP, I know everyone uses this as a pity sentence but just spend a minute of your life reading this because you need to open your eyes. Think to yourself, do you think there is a single […]

12/6/2021 8 comments

Parents

by idontbelonghereanymore 12/5/2021

written by idontbelonghereanymore

I overheard my mom talking about my mental state (because it had gotten so bad at this point, that I have to come back home for a while) and at that moment I felt like such a burden. She clearly said that I was too much for her right now with her new job and her mom also being in an old peoples house. My dad never even called me when I was in the hospital for 5 days. I don’t understand why they brought me into this world if I’m just gonna be a burden to them their whole life. I didn’t want to […]

12/5/2021 0 comment

No One to Blame

by mmmm 12/3/2021

written by mmmm

Maybe, it is me who is my own culprit, it is my fault that I did not act the way I was supposed to in order to survive in this cruel world. Maybe, everything that is bothering me is just an illusion, it is a noise coming from my mind that is making me feel worthless, reminding me constantly of all my flaws and insecurities. Maybe, I wronged myself by having expectations on others, hoping they would understand me, hoping that they will turn out the way I want , hoping they will bring happiness and well-being in my life. Maybe, I should have learned […]

12/3/2021 2 comments

love sucks

by wasabi_peas 11/29/2021

written by wasabi_peas

I had been wanting to die for about 6 years now. It still feels so normal. The intrusive thoughts of self harm, the gut wrenching pain of existing, the struggle to be productive, and my self hatred all feel like they have always been there, I forget what life was like without them. It took me a very long time to realize I needed help, to realize that I was allowed to feel this way and to begin to alter my mindset. However, now that I have, I am scared that it might have been too late. My boyfriend has helped a lot. I feel […]

11/29/2021 1 comment

Fuck It.

by Melon_Lord 11/28/2021

written by Melon_Lord

I’m so angry.
I’m SO ANGRY ALL THE TIME.
I feel like the whole world is against me, but you know what?
At this point, I’ve had the biggest epiphany. I don’t care anymore.

Imagine that.
Do, whatever the fuck you want.
Be a slut, dress how you want. Be an asshole, be kind, go out at night. get drunk, fall in love, make huge mistakes, lose and gain friends, burn bridges.
I don’t care what your parents say.
Do it.
Fucking do it, cause you know what, you only live once and no one is going to hear about us in those […]

11/28/2021 1 comment

Hello, how low

by Virus.Found 11/27/2021

written by Virus.Found

Today I woke up with a stomach ache. Want to know why.? Because the past few days have been a walking nightmare. My government decided on some Covid measures, on which I can’t take the public transportation anymore, even though I rely on it.

I live in a capital city. No, I am not vaccinated, ’cause I don’t trust it yet. In 3 years.? Maybe. (Please, if you have a toxic opinion about that, don’t drag me down even more) I just want that person, who clearly didn’t think about ill or old people who have risks taking it, to suffer. It’s without logic. A few […]

11/27/2021 0 comment

This really tripped me up

by doePrince 11/14/2021

written by doePrince

Im 30, never known my father other than he abused my mom till the day she gave birth to me. I found out hes been in prison since he was 21. Hes 50-something or other…point being i thought i didnt care. How could i? Someone so cruel to physically hurt the mother of their child even after giving birth to said child-thats not man. So why should i care? Recently outta the blue my mom shows me a picture of him for the first time in all my life and now- i dont know how to feel. Its weird, a numb kinda feeling. Like im […]

11/14/2021 3 comments

who knows what goes on in people’s heads

by plasticflower 11/7/2021

written by plasticflower

it sure has been a week. honestly it feels like years have gone by between monday and today, days feel kinda blurred? who knows. my head feels like a cat’s litter box.
food is still kinda difficult; i found my body feels hungry but i have no appetite and honestly not enough energy to actually eat, so there’s that.
at some point this week i found myself crying because for a few days i’d been craving a milkshake, or something like that? but just thinking about having to go downstairs, prepare it, wash the dishes and then drinking it was too much effort, so i […]

11/7/2021 0 comment

need some help with family issues.

by elkadaia_ 11/1/2021

written by elkadaia_

I’m going to do a psych eval soon, per my mother’s wishes. I’m— excited? Kind of? I’m happy that after three years I can finally rest easy and get these diagnoses. But I’m also, somewhat, scared? It’s understandable, the last psych eval I did ended in chaos — with me only getting a diagnose of unspec-anxiety and getting off with no therapy. My mother is slightly worried, but believes I’m “a-okay” and am just having a reaction to allergies (which makes. zero. sense in my book). I want to tell her that I’ve attempted eight times but I’m scared that if I do, she’ll disown […]

11/1/2021 0 comment

lately

by plasticflower 11/1/2021

written by plasticflower

i’m pretty tired. life’s been quite rough lately. honestly i just want to actually feel like i’m talking to someone, since people are busy with their own lives.
when i was younger, sleeping and eating came so easily to me, i could sleep and eat whenever i felt like it with no issue. that’s honestly the only fact that made me realize i’m kinda going downhill lately lol. ate a little bit of cereal for breakfast since i wasn’t hungry but knew i had to eat /something/. then, a bit ago i though i should eat a snack but felt like throwing up as soon […]

11/1/2021 2 comments

Disappointment.

by Melon_Lord 10/25/2021

written by Melon_Lord

I don’t want to disappoint them.
It’s to the point where I don’t even care about my own health and well being anymore.
Although….when will it be enough for you?

When will I be enough?

10/25/2021 0 comment

Suicidal

by emana 10/18/2021

written by emana

I have a girl friend who is suicidal and I’ve been by her side but I know she needs a therapist after reading a few comments I feel a little hopeless I just want her to be happy and I don’t want to lose her her family is the cause of her pain and she has told the school counselors and they notified her parents but her mom and dad aren’t taking any steps I’m on the phone with her rn and I know she feels like there’s no hope or reason to keep living in agony and I know she thinks that she doesn’t […]

10/18/2021 2 comments

I don’t understand myself either

by lostcase 10/15/2021

written by lostcase

the thing is, i don’t understand myself either. i am also a stranger to my own emotions and my own thoughts, my memory doesn’t work anymore too. they ask me what i mean and why i am like this as if i do know, they get mad as if i like being unbearable. i don’t think i have truly talked to anyone is a long while now.. i’ve spoken but not actually talked. i’m always mad too.. and hopeless, and frankly i want to punch every person that tells me it’ll get better.. no it won’t, the problem isn’t that i’m just not trying hard […]

10/15/2021 1 comment

Life is just boooooring

by deathonnile 10/15/2021

written by deathonnile

Hey there! This is deathonnile. New here, always wanted someone to share my story with, luckily I found this site the thing is I have range of diseases not the serious ones but minor ones like asthma, allergy and yea ocd. It also looks like maybe my parents want me dead you know so they could be happy coz you know they are tired taking care of me ,to them am just an investment , my parents have been supportive my entire teenage life but the thing is they expect so much from me yea both my parents are doctors earning loads of money so […]

10/15/2021 0 comment

Ugly

by sova 10/5/2021

written by sova

That’s just what echoes in my head. People/parents/friends/former didn’t left and that was the saddest part . Remember the day when I used to have panic attack and my parents dragged me to get on my ass. My mom exactly knew when I would shout back and thanks her for conferencing with all my family members(uncle/aunt/grandmother) and just waiting for the moment to trigger me to shout back and say them to leave me alone. Nice team you got with all your saddist/narcissistic friends. Been a looser/pathetic. My soulmate left. Just murmers inside my head. I am left with no purpose atleast I want to […]

10/5/2021 2 comments

Life goals and living for others

by chris_mgt 10/2/2021

written by chris_mgt

My death wish is the only constant thing through my life, bad days, good days, best days, my secret wish is always right here through all of them.

I have conquered most of the challenges that came my way through my 35 years yet my main goal still eludes me due to the knowledge of its consequences to others.

I don’t want to hurt those who care for me but on the other hand I live an unwanted (and empty) life because of them.

Should I estrange myself first? Is it better to be hated, missing, gone or plain dead? And why do I care for the difference, […]

10/2/2021 1 comment

I wish I wasn’t so goddamm soft and weak!

by lonewolf23 9/25/2021

written by lonewolf23

I’m 24 years old and I still struggle with having some decent self esteem. I’m a fucking joke of a man! It hurts so bad. I swear when I get my own place and leave this place……my mom and dad need to learn that I don’t want their protection. Overprotective parents ruin a child’s life especially if that child is a boy! I’m leaving one of these days and when I do I won’t be telling em. I’ll just be gone some morning. I know exactly what I need to do. It’s only a matter of time now. Im actually thirsty for some hardship in […]

9/25/2021 3 comments

Soulmates as Teenagers

by Virus.Found 9/23/2021

written by Virus.Found

Almost 8 years of friendship brought to an possible end, by not being appreciated by the better half… Your focus seems to be on new demeaning acquaintances, some crush you won’t conquer and some heavy veil of depression. I understand, yes I do.

Do you know, what freedom feels like.? I know. I have tasted it’s beauty, while taking exactly 7 days of radio silence from you. It has not peaked, like it does, when we laugh together. However, it is constant. A constant in my life, is what I need the most. And it is not you.

It was supposed to be airplanes, to visit each […]

9/23/2021 1 comment

Bye Bye

by linus 9/14/2021

written by linus

Heute ist der Tag der Tage, dachte ich; vor ein paar Tagen, an meinem Geburtstag; da wollte ich es beenden. Das Leid, das sich durch mein Leben zieht. Hat leider nicht geklappt. Nochmal auf diese Weise werde ich es nicht probieren. Heute wird es drastischer.
Ich denke das ich schon mein ganzes Leben suizidal bin, nur hätte ich es bis vor 9 Jahren nie zugegeben; aus Angst meinen Schöpfer, den ich sehr liebe zu verletzen. Liebe die ich erst für mich finden müsste. Dich dieser Glauben ist passe und ich glaube an keinen anderen Gott als den in mir.
Wie ich in diese Welt […]

9/14/2021 4 comments

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